Paper— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答基本切题，但有明显的时态、语法和搭配问题。“No, I don't I didn't”应改为“No, I haven't”或“No, I didn't”；“craft of paper”应改为“paper crafts”，“time consuming”应写作“time-consuming”。建议先直接回答，再给出一个简短、自然的原因，并避免重复表达。

例: No, I haven’t made many paper crafts because I find them quite time-consuming. I usually prefer activities that are more practical or creative, such as drawing or cooking.

提案: 回答提到了折纸飞机这一具体活动，但语法和表达不自然。“I would like”应改为过去时“I liked to”或“I used to”；“make an aeroplane have a competition”应改为“make paper planes and have competitions”；“the simple ways for gathering”表达不清楚，可改为“a simple way to spend time together”。建议使用过去时，并加入比赛结果或个人感受，使细节更完整。

例: When I was a child, I liked making paper planes and having competitions with my friends. We would see whose plane could fly the farthest, so it was a simple but enjoyable way to spend time together.

提案: 回答立场明确，但存在较多词汇和语法问题。“using mobile phones could allow me”不够自然，可改为“I use my mobile phone”；“a instance test”应改为“instant messages”；“WhatsApps or Instagrams”应改为“WhatsApp or Instagram”。建议直接说明现代通讯工具更快捷，并使用正确的不可数或专有名词表达。

例: No, I rarely write physical letters nowadays. I usually use my mobile phone because apps like WhatsApp and Instagram allow me to send instant messages and photos much more quickly.

提案: 回答有明确观点和原因，但“the elderly groups of people”应简化为“elderly people”，“have handwriting letters”应改为“keep handwritten letters”，“the latest technology of smartphone”应改为“the latest smartphone technology”。此外，并非所有老年人都不熟悉科技，可以使用更谨慎的表达，如“some elderly people”。

例: Yes, some people still keep handwritten letters, especially older adults. They may value them because letters feel personal and meaningful, and some of them are less comfortable using the latest smartphone technology.

提案: 回答包含工作中的具体原因，但句子结构较混乱。“carry out a pen”应改为“carry a pen”，“in my work”可改为“at work”，“in case of any certain situations”应改为“in case I need to write something down”，“pen tour record”应改为“record something in my notebook”。建议用“First... Also...”连接两个用途，并控制句子长度。

例: Yes, I usually carry a pen and a small notebook with me. I often need a pen to sign documents at work, and I also use it to write down important information when I am out.

× No, I don't I didn't make any craft of paper because it's so time consuming and boring for me.

✓ No, I haven't made any paper crafts because they're so time-consuming and boring for me.

问题中的“don't”和“didn't”重复且时态不符合问题。问题使用现在完成时“Have you made...”，因此回答应使用“haven't made”。另外，“crafts”是可数名词，前面有“any”时可以使用复数形式。

× No, I don't I didn't make any craft of paper because it's so time consuming and boring for me.

✓ No, I haven't made any paper crafts because they're so time-consuming and boring for me.

“I don't I didn't”把两个句子结构错误地连接在一起。一个完整的回答只需要使用“No, I haven't made...”即可。

× I would like to make an aeroplane have a competition with my friends because it is the simple ways for gathering.

✓ I liked making paper aeroplanes and having competitions with my friends because it was a simple way to get together.

“as a child”表示过去的经历，所以“is”应改为过去式“was”，“would like”应改为更符合语境的过去式“liked”。“making”和“having”分别作“liked”的宾语，使用动名词形式。

× I would like to make an aeroplane have a competition with my friends because it is the simple ways for gathering.

✓ I liked making paper aeroplanes and having competitions with my friends because it was a simple way to get together.

“like”后面表示喜欢做某事时，通常接动名词，因此应使用“liked making”。为了保持并列结构，“have”也应改为“having”。

× I would like to make an aeroplane have a competition with my friends because it is the simple ways for gathering.

✓ I liked making paper aeroplanes and having competitions with my friends because it was a simple way to get together.

这里是在描述通常的童年活动，所以“aeroplane”和“competition”应使用复数形式“aeroplanes”和“competitions”。但是“a simple way”表示一种简单的方法，因此使用单数形式“way”。

× I would like to make an aeroplane have a competition with my friends because it is the simple ways for gathering.

✓ I liked making paper aeroplanes and having competitions with my friends because it was a simple way to get together.

“the simple ways”使用冠词和复数形式不恰当。这里表达“一种简单的方法”，应使用“a simple way”，而不是“the simple ways”。

× No, I don't write physical letters because nowadays using mobile phones could allow me to have a instance test to others such as WhatsApps or Instagrams.

✓ No, I don't write physical letters because nowadays I can send instant messages to others using mobile phones, such as WhatsApp or Instagram.

“nowadays”表示现在的情况，表达现在具备的能力时，使用“can”比“could”更合适。“can”后面直接接动词原形“send”。

× No, I don't write physical letters because nowadays using mobile phones could allow me to have a instance test to others such as WhatsApps or Instagrams.

✓ No, I don't write physical letters because nowadays I can send instant messages to others using mobile phones, such as WhatsApp or Instagram.

元音音素开头的“instant”前面应使用“an”，不能使用“a”。此外，正确的表达是“instant messages”，意思是“即时消息”。

× Yes, the elderly groups of people would like to have handwriting letters to others because they are not familiar with the latest technology of smartphone.

✓ Yes, elderly people still like to keep handwritten letters because they are not familiar with the latest smartphone technology.

“handwriting”表示“书写”这一动作，不能用来修饰“letters”。表示“手写的信”时，应使用过去分词“handwritten”作为形容词。

× Yes, the elderly groups of people would like to have handwriting letters to others because they are not familiar with the latest technology of smartphone.

✓ Yes, elderly people still like to keep handwritten letters because they are not familiar with the latest smartphone technology.

“technology of smartphone”中的介词“of”使用不自然。表示“智能手机技术”时，应使用名词复合结构“smartphone technology”。

× Yes, I need to carry out a pen for signing a lot of documents in my work besides in case of any certain situations I need to have a pen tour record on my notebook.

✓ Yes, I need to carry a pen to sign a lot of documents at work. Besides, in case of certain situations, I need to have a pen to record things in my notebook.

“carry out”表示“执行”或“完成”，不能表示“随身携带一支笔”，所以应改为“carry a pen”。“at work”是表示“在工作中”的常用介词搭配。

× Yes, I need to carry out a pen for signing a lot of documents in my work besides in case of any certain situations I need to have a pen tour record on my notebook.

✓ Yes, I need to carry a pen to sign a lot of documents at work. Besides, in case of certain situations, I need to have a pen to record things in my notebook.

原句把两个完整意思直接连接在一起，缺少清晰的句子边界。“Besides”后面应开始一个新句子，并且“a pen tour record”结构错误，应改为“a pen to record things”。

× Yes, I need to carry out a pen for signing a lot of documents in my work besides in case of any certain situations I need to have a pen tour record on my notebook.

✓ Yes, I need to carry a pen to sign a lot of documents at work. Besides, in case of certain situations, I need to have a pen to record things in my notebook.

“in case of”后面这里表示某些特定情况时，不需要使用“any”。“certain situations”已经能够表达“某些情况”。