Clothing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific details (occasions, favorite items, or reasons). Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' to connect ideas.

例: I like both Indian and Western clothes, but I prefer Indian wear because I find it more comfortable and culturally meaningful. For example, I often wear kurtas for family gatherings and sarees for special occasions.

提案: Avoid hesitation and correct grammar. Give a clear topic sentence, then explain with one concise reason and a short example. Use linking words like 'because' and 'for example' and avoid repeating words.

例: I prefer comfortable, casual clothes because I can move and concentrate better in them. For example, I avoid tight shoes or stiff shirts as they make me distracted during work.

提案: Clarify your meaning and avoid contradictory or unclear phrases. Give one clear reason why you like T-shirts and a simple supporting detail. Use correct vocabulary (e.g. 'confident' or 'comfortable' instead of 'sure' and do not say 'stressful').

例: Yes, I love wearing T-shirts because they are comfortable and easy to wash. For instance, I usually choose cotton T-shirts for casual outings because they keep me cool and relaxed.

提案: Reduce filler words and repetition. State your answer clearly, then give a specific reason and an example of how you decide. Use linking words like 'because' and 'for example'.

例: Yes, I spend a lot of time choosing clothes because I am picky about comfort and style. For example, before going out I often try on two or three outfits to make sure I look neat and feel comfortable.

× Well, I love to. Well, I love to wear both Indian and Western clothes, but more specifically, I love to wear Indian wear.

✓ Well, I love wearing both Indian and Western clothes, but more specifically, I love Indian wear.

Use of 'love to wear' is acceptable but repetitive 'love to. Well, I love to wear' is awkward and the gerund 'loving wearing' or 'love wearing' is more natural here; remove the repeated fragment and the redundant 'to' for fluency. Also 'Indian wear' is fine without 'to wear' after it.

× Uh, well I prefer to wear more comfortable and casual clothes than the smart clothes because when when you are not comfortable in your clothes then there is no need of a smart clothes.

✓ Uh, well I prefer to wear more comfortable and casual clothes rather than smart clothes because if you are not comfortable in your clothes, there is no need for smart clothes.

Problems: repeated word 'when when' and incorrect comparison structure 'more ... than the smart clothes' — use 'rather than smart clothes'. Article error 'a smart clothes' (plural) should be 'smart clothes' or 'a smart outfit'. Preposition 'need of' is incorrect; use 'need for'. Use consistent second person 'you' and conditional 'if' to express the idea clearly.

× For for instance, if you are wearing a shoes but that is not fitting you properly and making you uncomfortable, then these kinds of smart clothes or smart.

✓ For instance, if you are wearing shoes that do not fit you properly and make you uncomfortable, then those so-called smart clothes are not useful.

Issues: repeated 'for for'; article error 'a shoes' (plural should be 'shoes' without 'a'); verb agreement 'is not fitting' should be 'do not fit' for plural 'shoes'; mixed tense and awkward fragment 'these kinds of smart clothes or smart' — rephrase to 'those so-called smart clothes are not useful'.

× Yes, I love to wear T-shirts, and T-shirts always make me feel sure, always make me feel comfortable and stressful, and tissues are my favorite.

✓ Yes, I love wearing T-shirts; T-shirts always make me feel confident and comfortable, and T-shirts are my favorite.

Problems: 'love to wear' repetitive; 'make me feel sure' is unnatural — use 'confident'; 'comfortable and stressful' contradicts (stressful means causing stress) — likely intended 'stylish' or remove 'stressful'; 'tissues are my favorite' is incorrect word choice and probably meant 'T-shirts are my favorite'. Adjust vocabulary and parallel structure.

× Yes, I do spend a lot of time in choosing my clothes.

✓ Yes, I do spend a lot of time choosing my clothes.

The preposition 'in' is unnecessary with 'spend time' followed by a gerund. Use 'spend time choosing' rather than 'spend time in choosing'.

× Uh, well, I am a very picky person and I, I take my proper time to choose my clothes, what I want to wear and in which clothes I can feel comfortable.

✓ Uh, well, I am a very picky person and I take my time to choose my clothes: what I want to wear and which clothes will make me comfortable.

Problems: repeated 'I, I'; awkward phrasing 'take my proper time' — use 'take my time'; word order 'in which clothes I can feel comfortable' is unnatural; rephrase to 'which clothes will make me comfortable' for clarity and correct word order.

× So definitely I spend a lot of time in choosing my clothes.

✓ So definitely I spend a lot of time choosing my clothes.

Same 'spend time in choosing' error: remove 'in' before gerund. Keep tense consistent and concise.