Headphones— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and clear. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail. Avoid unclear words (e.g. “cohe”) and redundancy.

例: Yes. I often use headphones when I study English online to focus on pronunciation. For example, I wear them while watching lessons on BBC Learning English so I can hear pronunciation clearly.

提案: Give a clear, short description and one reason. Use precise vocabulary (comfortable, noise-cancelling, over-ear) and avoid repeating the same idea.

例: I prefer comfortable over-ear headphones with good padding and noise-cancelling features. They are better for long study sessions because they reduce background noise and prevent ear discomfort.

提案: Answer directly, then give one or two specific situations. Use linking words like "for example" or "also" and avoid repeating reasons.

例: I use headphones when I watch BBC Learning English videos to concentrate on pronunciation and vocabulary. I also wear them when watching movies, because they improve sound quality and block out distractions.

提案: Make your point clear and polite. Start with a topic sentence about when you wouldn’t use headphones, then briefly explain why. Avoid odd or irrelevant descriptions (e.g. “green haired peoples”).

例: I avoid wearing headphones when I’m sitting with older relatives because it can seem rude and make conversation difficult. However, in very noisy places I would use headphones or earphones to hear better.

提案: Give a clear general statement, then one specific reason and an example. Use correct terms (e.g. "comfort", "sound quality", "hearing health") and avoid absolute claims about damage without explaining volume or duration.

例: Comfort depends on the design and quality of the headphones. For instance, high-quality over-ear models with soft padding are comfortable for long use, while cheap in-ear models can be uncomfortable and may encourage listening at high volume, which can harm hearing over time.

× Yes, I usually use headphones from my educational products such as learning English to improve my communication skills and I use the headphones to see movies as a particular cohe.

✓ Yes, I usually use headphones for my educational activities, such as learning English to improve my communication skills, and I use headphones to watch movies.

The sentence uses incorrect prepositions and awkward phrases: 'use headphones from my educational products' should be 'use headphones for my educational activities'; 'see movies' should be 'watch movies'. Also 'as a particular cohe' is unclear and removed. Use 'for' to indicate purpose and 'watch' for movies.

× The headphones that are more comfortable and provide flexibility to the ears are most preferred by me as headphones that are very high quality that can provide peace and flexibility to ears instead of any discomfort that are being caused by the low quality.

✓ I prefer headphones that are comfortable and gentle on the ears, preferably high-quality ones that provide comfort instead of the discomfort caused by low-quality models.

The original has article and word choice issues ('the headphones that are more comfortable' is awkward). Use plural noun without repeated article: 'I prefer headphones' and 'high-quality ones'. Also 'provide flexibility to the ears' is unnatural; 'gentle on the ears' or 'comfortable' is clearer.

× Whenever I go to see the BBC learning English videos to improve my English skills, I prefer to use headphones despite of earphones or any other things as headphones provide my ears more comfortability and flexibility and while I go to watch movies.

✓ When I watch BBC Learning English videos to improve my skills, I prefer to use headphones instead of earphones because headphones are more comfortable for my ears, and I also use them when I watch movies.

'Go to see' should be 'watch'; 'despite of' is incorrect—use 'instead of'; 'comfortability' is nonstandard—use 'comfortable'. Reorder for clarity and correct preposition use.

× In the noisy place I will prefer to use headphones, but instead of that, whenever I sit with the elder ones like the old aged green haired peoples with my grandmother grandfather, I do not prefer to use headphones as it will symbolize the ignoring to the surroundings.

✓ In noisy places I prefer to use headphones, but when I sit with older family members such as my grandparents, I do not use headphones because it would seem rude and show that I am ignoring my surroundings.

Use plural 'places'; 'elder ones' and 'old aged green haired peoples' are incorrect and possibly offensive—use 'older family members' or 'grandparents'. 'Symbolize the ignoring to the surroundings' is ungrammatical; use 'seem rude' or 'show that I am ignoring my surroundings'. Correct prepositions and article use.

× Usually it depends on the quality of the headphones as the high quality headphones will provide flexibility and comfortability to ears, but the low and cheaper headphones will not provide any qualities to the ears and will damage the hearing condition of our ear.

✓ It usually depends on the quality of the headphones: high-quality headphones provide comfort for the ears, but cheap, low-quality headphones may not and can harm our hearing.

'High quality' should be 'high-quality' (hyphenated when used as an adjective); 'comfortability' is nonstandard—use 'comfort'; 'low and cheaper' is redundant—use 'cheap, low-quality'. 'Damage the hearing condition of our ear' is awkward—use 'harm our hearing'.