Headphones— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct and structured. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No), then give one or two concise reasons with specific examples. Reduce hesitation sounds (uh) and avoid repetition.

例: Not really. I only use headphones occasionally, mainly when I want to practice listening to English or when I’m outdoors in noisy or cloudy weather. For example, I wear them for about an hour each evening to follow English lessons on my phone.

提案: Begin with a clear sentence naming the type, then give a brief reason with one specific detail. Avoid repetition and incomplete phrases.

例: I usually use Apple AirPods. They are compact and lightweight, so they’re easy to carry in my pocket when I travel or go for a walk.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence about typical situations, then support with two specific examples and a precise time reference. Use linking words (for example, or usually) to improve coherence and avoid vague phrases like 'cloudy area'—clarify whether you mean noisy places or outdoors.

例: I use headphones in a few situations. For example, I wear them when I’m in noisy places to talk to friends or family, and I also use them to practice listening to English lessons—usually for about one hour a day.

提案: Start with a clear negative statement (I don’t use headphones when...), then give one or two specific conditions and a short reason each. Clarify ambiguous terms like 'cloudy area' and avoid run-on sentences.

例: I don’t use headphones in situations where I need to stay alert, such as when I’m walking in busy streets or waiting for an important phone call. Also, I avoid using over-ear models because they feel uncomfortable after a long time.

× Not really, sometimes I use it and sometimes no uh, sometimes in cloudy area I need headphones and for more practice I need my headphones but uh, sometimes I feel it's not comfortable from my ears.

✓ Not really. Sometimes I use them and sometimes I don't. In cloudy areas I need headphones, and for extra practice I need my headphones, but sometimes I feel they are uncomfortable on my ears.

Pronoun and agreement: 'headphones' is plural, so use the plural pronoun 'them' instead of 'it'. Use 'don't' for negative with subject. Use plural form 'cloudy areas' or 'in cloudy weather/places'. 'Not comfortable from my ears' is incorrect; correct is 'uncomfortable on my ears' or 'they are uncomfortable for my ears'. Also split run-on sentence into shorter sentences for clarity.

× Usually use the Airpods headphones because it's a small easy easy to take until.

✓ I usually use AirPods because they are small and easy to carry.

Pronoun and subject: include subject 'I'. 'AirPods' is plural so use 'they are' not 'it's'. 'Easy to take until' is incorrect phrasing; use 'easy to carry'. Remove redundant word 'easy' repeated.

× I use it in cloudy area when I talk with my friend and my family sometimes for practice or practice and listening English. But you can see exist one hour a day usually.

✓ I use them in cloudy areas when I talk with my friends and family, sometimes for practice or for listening to English. Usually I use them for about one hour a day.

Pronoun agreement: 'headphones' is plural so use 'them'. Use plural for 'friends' and 'cloudy areas' or better 'in cloudy weather'. 'Practice and listening English' needs preposition: 'listening to English'. The phrase about duration should be 'about one hour a day' or 'for one hour a day'.

× I have headphones, airport headphones already but I'm not use it always because I feel it is not comfortable for me if I need it for emergency calling, cloudy area for listening English just in this case.

✓ I already have airport headphones, but I don't use them all the time because I find them uncomfortable. I only use them for emergency calls or for listening to English in noisy areas.

Pronoun and verb issues: use 'don't use them' for plural 'headphones'. 'I'm not use it always' is incorrect; correct 'I don't use them all the time'. 'I feel it is not comfortable for me' should be 'I find them uncomfortable'. 'Emergency calling' -> 'emergency calls'. 'Cloudy area' likely means 'noisy areas' or 'crowded/noisy places'; use clearer phrase. Also simplify and split sentence for clarity.