Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise, correct grammar and organize into a clear topic sentence plus one or two supporting details. Avoid repetition and fix tense and article errors. Use linking words like 'however' or 'instead' to show contrast.

例: As a child, I didn't enjoy going to parks. Instead, I preferred staying at home and painting with my father, so I rarely went outside to play.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence about your current habit, correct verb forms and avoid filler words. Use one linking phrase to explain the reason and give a time reference (e.g., 'recently', 'on weekends').

例: Yes, I do go to parks now. Recently I started running in parks because I want to exercise more, so I usually visit a park at the weekends.

提案: Answer directly and give specific reasons. Remove hesitations and unclear phrases. Use linking words ('because', 'so', 'for example') and specific vocabulary (atmosphere, greenery, walking paths).

例: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because I enjoy the peaceful atmosphere and greenery. For example, I like walking among trees and sketching landscapes, so more parks would give me more places to relax and draw.

提案: Respond with a clear statement about whether you have specific parks in mind. If not, explain how you choose parks (recommendations, online research). Use correct phrasing and avoid repetition; finish the sentence with a concrete criterion (e.g., 'nice atmosphere' -> 'quiet, green spaces').

例: I don't have a specific park in mind, but I usually rely on friends' recommendations and Instagram to find nice places. I would choose parks that have quiet, green areas and good walking paths.

× Actually when I was child, I hate to exercise, even work or even work and of course going to the park.

✓ Actually, when I was a child, I hated exercising, doing chores, and of course going to the park.

Singular and plural: 'when I was child' needs the article 'a' (singular noun). Verb tense also fits past (see ID 5) so 'hate' should be 'hated' and gerunds required for activities: 'exercise' -> 'exercising', 'work' -> 'doing chores' to be natural. Suggestion: use 'a child' and match past tense and gerunds for activities. Note: This correction primarily addresses the singular article error and aligns verb forms to past tense and gerund use.

× So usually I stay home and paint or drawing with my dad.

✓ So usually I stayed home and painted or drew with my dad.

The original mixes bare infinitive and -ing: 'paint or drawing' is inconsistent. Also tense should be past to match 'when I was a child'. Use past simple verbs 'stayed', 'painted', or use parallel forms 'painted or drew'. Suggestion: keep consistent tense and parallel verb forms.

× So yeah, definitely I'm not person going to the park.

✓ So yeah, definitely I'm not a person who goes to the park.

Missing article 'a' before 'person' (article error ID 22) and relative clause needed. Also subject-verb agreement: 'person going' is awkward; use 'person who goes'. Suggestion: include 'a' and add 'who' with correct verb form 'goes'.

× Umm, even if I don't like used to go to the park when I was young, recently I feel like I need to do some exercise and best exercise is the running or work work in the nature.

✓ Umm, even though I didn't use to like going to the park when I was young, recently I feel like I need to do some exercise, and the best exercise is running or working in nature.

Multiple issues: 'don't like used to' is incorrect—use 'didn't use to' for past habitual dislike (past tense ID 5). 'go to the park when I was young' needs 'going' as a gerund. 'best exercise is the running or work work in the nature' contains article and word choice errors: use 'the best exercise is running' and 'working in nature' (no 'the' before nature). Suggestion: use 'didn't use to', gerunds for activities, and natural collocations 'running' and 'working in nature'.

× So yeah, I try to go to the park when I have time, especially in the on the weekend.

✓ So yeah, I try to go to the park when I have time, especially on the weekend.

Preposition error: 'in the on the weekend' is redundant. Use 'on the weekend' or 'at the weekend' depending on variety. Suggestion: remove extra words and use correct preposition 'on' for weekend.

× Yes, if I can, I want to go more, more other park, uh, because I like the atmosphere about the park and nature and all they they have a lot of trees.

✓ Yes, if I can, I want to visit more parks because I like the atmosphere of parks and nature; they have a lot of trees.

Awkward phrasing 'go more, more other park' — use 'visit more parks'. 'Atmosphere about the park' should be 'atmosphere of parks'. Repetition 'they they' is a mistake. Modal 'if I can' is acceptable but sentence needed clearer structure. Suggestion: use 'visit more parks' and 'atmosphere of parks' and remove repeated words.

× So yeah, actually I love the painted tree or drawing something.

✓ So yeah, actually I love painted trees and drawing things.

Mismatch of noun forms: 'the painted tree' is oddly specific; if meaning the activity use plural 'painted trees' or 'painting trees'. 'drawing something' is vague; use 'drawing things' or 'drawing pictures'. Gerund forms or plurals should be consistent. Suggestion: use plural nouns or gerunds consistently: 'painting trees' or 'love painted trees'.

× So I want to explore other park and want to see many trees.

✓ So I want to explore other parks and see many trees.

Singular/plural mismatch: 'other park' should be 'other parks' or 'another park'. Repetition 'and want to' is redundant. Suggestion: use 'other parks' or 'another park' and avoid repeating verbs unnecessarily.

× Actually I don't know which park is good, I just recommendation.

✓ Actually I don't know which park is good; I just have a recommendation.

'I just recommendation' lacks a verb and article. Add 'have' and use 'a recommendation' (article error ID 22). Suggestion: include verbs and correct articles: 'I just have a recommendation.'

× I just get the recommendation from my friend and when I have time I just search the Google or on the Instagram for the information.

✓ I just got the recommendation from my friend, and when I have time I search Google or Instagram for information.

Tense: 'get' should be past 'got' to match context (past tense ID 5). Prepositions: 'search the Google' and 'on the Instagram' are incorrect: use 'search Google' and 'Instagram' without 'the' or 'on'. Also 'for the information' -> 'for information'. Suggestion: use correct verb tense, omit unnecessary articles and prepositions with platform names.

× So I don't know the park's name but I want to go if somewhere nice atmosphere and.

✓ So I don't know the park's name, but I want to go if it has a nice atmosphere.

The sentence is incomplete and ungrammatical: 'if somewhere nice atmosphere and' lacks subject and verb and connector. Use 'if it has a nice atmosphere.' Suggestion: complete the conditional clause with subject 'it' and verb 'has' and remove trailing conjunction.