Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is natural and relevant, but slightly repetitive and occasionally awkward (e.g., "It feels fascinating"). To improve, give a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Vary vocabulary (e.g., "enchanted" or "comforted") and avoid extra phrases that repeat the same idea.

例: Yes — I loved going to parks as a child because I enjoyed watching squirrels and listening to birds. For example, I used to spend hours following a family of squirrels and reading under a large oak, which made me feel calm and connected to nature.

提案: The answer is clear but contains awkward word choices ("squirrels grumping") and repeats ideas from the previous response. Improve by using precise vocabulary, one linking word to expand, and a concise topic sentence. Add a brief example or reason to make it specific.

例: Yes, I still enjoy parks because they help me unwind. For instance, I often sit on a bench and listen to birds while watching squirrels dart across the lawn, which helps me de-stress after a busy day.

提案: This answer is conversational but unfocused and contains errors ("squirrels Curry", awkward phrasing). Keep the response concise: state whether you want more parks, then give one clear reason with a linking word. Correct grammatical issues and avoid irrelevant personal details beyond a short example.

例: Yes, I would — more parks would give people space to relax and exercise. For example, my partner and I often cycle to nearby green spaces to unwind, so additional parks would make that easier for more residents.

提案: Good willingness to explore, but the answer repeats "discover" and uses an unclear word ("squirrels Curry"). Improve by giving a specific kind of park or a named feature you want to visit, and use linking words to add one clear reason or plan.

例: Yes — I'd like to visit the botanical gardens nearby because they have rare tree species and quiet walking paths. I think exploring there would be relaxing and would let me see different plants and birds.

× 'I loved going to parks as a child to watch squirrels and to hear the birds singing.'

✓ 'I loved going to parks as a child to watch squirrels and to hear the birds sing.'

'singing' is a present participle used like a noun; after verbs of perception (watch, hear) the base verb (bare infinitive) is preferred when the action is perceived whole. Use 'hear the birds sing' for correct verb form and natural English.'

× 'It feels fascinating to be surrounded by nature.'

✓ 'It felt fascinating to be surrounded by nature.'

'Feels' is present tense while the rest of the sentence refers to childhood (past). Maintain tense consistency by using past tense 'felt' when describing feelings as a child.'

× 'Even now, I still visit parks to enjoy the greenery and relax among the trees in the grass.'

✓ 'Even now, I still visit parks to enjoy the greenery and relax among the trees and grass.'

'in the grass' is awkward with 'among the trees'; using 'and grass' is more natural and keeps present tense correct. This also avoids unnecessary preposition repetition.'

× 'Yes, I still enjoy going to parks and relaxing among the trees and the grass as I love listening to bird singing and watching squirrels grumping over the grass.'

✓ 'Yes, I still enjoy going to parks and relaxing among the trees and grass, as I love listening to birds sing and watching squirrels scurry across the grass.'

Change 'bird singing' to 'birds sing' following perception verb pattern and pluralize 'birds'. 'Grumping' is not correct for squirrel movement; 'scurry' is the appropriate verb. Also remove the extra 'the' before 'grass' for natural phrasing.'

× 'Yes for sure. I'd like to see more parks in my city and every time I miss my boyfriend we go for a walk or we ride the bike and go to discover new nature or new parts in general by riding the bike.'

✓ 'Yes, for sure. I'd like to see more parks in my city. Whenever I miss my boyfriend, we go for a walk or ride a bike to discover new natural areas or new parts of the city.'

'Every time' is better as 'whenever' for habitual actions. 'Ride the bike' should be 'ride a bike' or 'ride bicycles.' 'Discover new nature' is unnatural; use 'discover new natural areas' or 'parts of the city.' Split into two sentences for clarity and correct prepositions.'

× 'We love watching squirrels Curry and listening to bird singing.'

✓ 'We love watching squirrels scurry and listening to birds sing.'

'Curry' is a capitalized noun and incorrect here; the intended verb is 'scurry' meaning to move quickly. 'Bird singing' should be 'birds sing' following perception verb usage and plural form.'

× 'Yes, definitely. I'd like to go to discover some other parks in the future and discover new green areas, new trees and relaxing while hearing singing birds and watching squirrels Curry.'

✓ 'Yes, definitely. I'd like to discover other parks in the future and find new green areas and trees, relaxing while hearing birds sing and watching squirrels scurry.'

Remove the unnecessary 'go to discover' and use 'discover' directly. Keep conditional/wish with 'I'd like' and maintain parallel structure: 'discover... and find... relaxing while...' Replace 'singing birds' with 'birds sing' after perception verbs and correct 'Curry' to 'scurry.' Ensure verb forms match the intended future desire.'