Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve grammar (past tense and articles), reduce repetition, and organize into a clear topic sentence plus brief supporting detail. Use linking words for coherence and give one specific example.

例: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child. I used to go almost every weekend with my friends, where we played tag and swung on the swings. Those visits were fun and helped me make close friends.

提案: Correct verb forms and prepositions, avoid filler words, and state a clear reason with one specific activity. Use a linking word to connect past and present.

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks now. Nowadays I usually have picnics there with my family, so I can relax outdoors and enjoy nature.

提案: Fix countable noun and plural forms, improve word choice (greenery, parks) and give a precise reason. Use a linking phrase to make the opinion clear.

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because more greenery would improve air quality and provide relaxing spaces for exercise and socializing.

提案: Use correct article before proper nouns, fix pronoun agreement, avoid vague phrases like 'lyrics'. Give one clear reason and a specific expectation. Keep it within a few concise sentences.

例: Yes, I'd love to visit Central Park in New York because I have heard it is very beautiful and full of trees and lawns. I hope to walk around the lakes and relax there to feel refreshed.

× Yes I like going to parks as a child because I like I used to play tags and like swings.

✓ Yes, I liked going to parks as a child because I used to play tag and use the swings.

The sentence mixes present and past tense. The question asks about childhood (past), so use past tense: 'liked' and 'used to'. Also 'play tags' should be 'play tag' (singular name of the game) and 'like swings' should be 'use the swings' to show correct verb and article usage.

× When I was child I went park like almost every weekend with my friend and pray at park.

✓ When I was a child I went to the park almost every weekend with my friend and played at the park.

Missing article: 'a child'. Preposition and article errors: 'went park' should be 'went to the park'. 'Like' as filler removed. Verb tense: use past 'played'. Also 'pray at park' is likely intended 'play at the park' (spelling error); corrected to 'played at the park'.

× Yeah, I like going to the parks now too, because I like spend time in at outside that We changed how to spend time in at the park, but now like I spend time picnics.

✓ Yeah, I like going to parks now too, because I like spending time outside. We have changed how we spend time in the park, and now I like to have picnics.

Mix of tense and form errors: 'like spend' should be gerund 'like spending'. Remove redundant prepositions 'in at outside' -> 'outside'. Use present perfect 'have changed' to indicate change from past to now, and 'we spend' for subject-verb agreement. 'spend time picnics' corrected to 'have picnics' or 'like to have picnics'.

× Yes, I'd like to see more park in my city because park has many green and green helps us to keep healthy and relaxing so I think we need more perks in my city.

✓ Yes, I'd like to see more parks in my city because parks have a lot of greenery, and green spaces help us stay healthy and relaxed, so I think we need more parks in my city.

Pluralization: 'more park' -> 'more parks'; 'park has many green' should be 'parks have a lot of greenery' or 'green spaces'. 'keep healthy and relaxing' wrong verb/adjective forms -> 'help us stay healthy and relaxed'. Also 'perks' is wrong word; should be 'parks'.

× Yes, I'd like to go Central Park in New York because I heard that they're so nice place and like they have so many green.

✓ Yes, I'd like to go to Central Park in New York because I heard that it's such a nice place and that it has a lot of greenery.

Missing preposition 'to' after 'go'. Pronoun and number: 'they're so nice place' should be 'it's such a nice place' (Central Park is singular). 'they have so many green' -> 'it has a lot of greenery' (correct noun and count).

× So I like to go and lyrics and feel healthy.

✓ So I would like to go and relax and feel healthy.

'lyrics' is incorrect word choice; likely intended 'relax'. Use 'would like' to politely express desire. 'and feel healthy' is fine but 'relax' corrects the verb meaning.