Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cải thiện điểm ngữ pháp và độ tự nhiên: tránh lặp từ, dùng thì đúng (past tense), sửa từ không chính xác (“back box” → “backyard” hoặc “park”), và làm câu ngắn gọn hơn. Thêm liên kết logic (because, so) hợp lý và cụ thể hóa chi tiết (ví dụ: how often, who with, what games).

例: Yes, I did. I often went to the local park with my friends and family to play football and have picnics, so I enjoyed the peaceful atmosphere and fresh air.

提案: Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp và lược bỏ lặp từ: tránh trùng lặp (“parks are parks”), dùng cấu trúc tự nhiên hơn (e.g. “because they have a peaceful atmosphere”). Nên cho biết tần suất và hoạt động cụ thể để làm câu phong phú hơn.

例: Yes, I do. I usually visit a nearby park at the weekend because it has a peaceful atmosphere where I can relax, read a book, or go for a walk.

提案: Tránh nói mơ hồ và lặp ý (curious, know more). Nên nêu lý do rõ ràng vì sao cần thêm công viên (ví dụ: sức khỏe cộng đồng, không gian xanh), và sử dụng linking words (for example, because, so) hợp lý hơn.

例: Yes, I would. I think more parks would be beneficial because they provide green space for exercise and relaxation, and for example I could try different parks to find the most convenient one for weekend walks.

提案: Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp (have/has), dùng từ chính xác (theme park là loại công viên giải trí), và cụ thể hóa lý do (nêu hoạt động cụ thể bạn muốn thử). Thêm liên từ để câu mạch lạc hơn.

例: Yes. I would like to visit the nearby theme park because I heard it has many rides and attractions, and I think it would be a fun way to unwind after a busy week.

× Umm, yes I did. I like to, I like going to the back box as a child because I can, I could play football with my family or my friends and and the park is very clear so I can enjoy a peaceful atmosphere there.

✓ Umm, yes I did. I liked going to the park as a child because I could play football with my family or my friends and the park was very clean so I could enjoy a peaceful atmosphere there.

The speaker mixes present tense with past context. The question asks about childhood (past), so verbs should be past: like -> liked, can -> could, is -> was. Also 'back box' seems incorrect; likely meant 'park'. Use 'clean' instead of 'clear' for describing a tidy park. Suggestion: maintain past tense consistently when talking about past experiences and choose appropriate vocabulary. Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Yes, I do. I still like going to parks now because parks are parks have clear and peaceful atmosphere so I can relax at the weekend.

✓ Yes, I do. I still like going to parks now because parks have a clear and peaceful atmosphere, so I can relax at the weekend.

There is an extra repeated word 'parks' and a mix of singular/plural and article usage with 'atmosphere'. Use 'parks have' for plural and 'a clear and peaceful atmosphere' to refer to the quality. Keep present tense 'like' and 'can' because this is about now. Suggestion: remove redundant words and include the article 'a' before 'clear and peaceful atmosphere'. Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Yes, I would. I would like to see more parks in my country because I am a bit curious so I want to know more about parks so I can know which places are suitable for me.

✓ Yes, I would. I would like to see more parks in my country because I am a bit curious, so I want to learn more about parks and find out which places are suitable for me.

Verb choices and tense are generally fine, but repetition 'so I can know' is awkward. Use 'want to learn' and 'find out' for natural English. Maintain modal 'would like' for preference. Suggestion: avoid repeating 'so' and use more natural collocations like 'learn about' and 'find out'. Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Yes there are. I want to go to the theme park because I heard it is very nice and have has a lot of things for me to play and relax after a busy week.

✓ Yes there are. I want to go to the theme park because I heard it is very nice and has a lot of things for me to do to play and relax after a busy week.

There is a subject-verb agreement and auxiliary confusion: 'have has' is incorrect; the singular subject 'it' requires 'has'. Also 'a lot of things for me to play' is awkward; use 'a lot of things for me to do, to play and relax' or 'activities for me to enjoy'. Suggestion: use correct verb form with the subject ('it has') and choose natural expressions like 'things to do' or 'activities to enjoy'. Grammar problem type ID:27