Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct with a clear topic sentence, correct verb tenses and reduce repetition. Use one or two supporting details with linking words. Focus on clarity: say when (as a child), how it felt, and one example. Correct grammar: past tense for childhood memories and singular/plural agreement.

例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I felt free there because the park was very large, so I could run around and play games with my friends. For example, we used to play hide-and-seek near the big trees every weekend.

提案: Answer directly and use correct present tense and countable/uncountable forms. Give one or two clear reasons linked with linking words (e.g., because, so). Avoid repetition and long hesitations.

例: Not really. I don't usually go to parks now because I am very busy with my homework and part-time work, so I rarely have free time. If I finish my tasks early, I sometimes go for a short walk in a nearby park.

提案: State your opinion clearly and provide specific reasons with linking words. Use correct noun phrases (more parks) and clear expressions (people can relax and recharge). Give a concrete effect or example of benefits to the city.

例: Definitely. I would like to see more parks in my city because they give people places to relax and exercise, which improves public health. For instance, a new park could provide walking paths and benches where residents can unwind after work.

提案: Be coherent and avoid contradicting statements. If you mean you don't want new parks because you miss a specific park abroad, say that clearly using the past tense and a short reason. Provide one specific memory or reason to support your answer.

例: No, there aren't any particular parks I want to visit in the future because I miss the park from my hometown and hope to return there. For example, I loved the lakeside park back home where I used to meet my family on Sundays.

× Yes I do like going to the park when I would try because it make me feel like I can run away far so far in that park because that apart that park is so long and I will enjoy to play.

✓ Yes, I liked going to the park when I was a child because it made me feel like I could run far in that park; that park was very big and I enjoyed playing there.

Errors: incorrect tense usage and verb forms (present vs past), subject-verb agreement, and unnatural phrasing. The question asks about childhood, so past tense should be used (liked, was, made, could, enjoyed). 'Make' should be 'made' to agree with past time. 'I can' should be 'I could.' 'I will enjoy to play' is incorrect: use 'I enjoyed playing.' Improve by keeping consistent past tense and using appropriate verb forms and natural collocations. ID:6

× No, I don't usually go into park nowadays because I have too much thing to do like home works, how works and my my deadline I I have to I have to complete complete so I don't have too much free time to go into park.

✓ No, I don't usually go to parks nowadays because I have too many things to do, like homework and work, and I have deadlines I have to meet, so I don't have much free time to go to the park.

Errors: incorrect article use and countability (article errors and quantifiers). Use 'go to parks' or 'go to the park'; 'park' needs an article or plural. 'Too much thing' should be 'too many things.' 'Home works' is uncountable 'homework.' 'How works' unclear, corrected to 'work.' 'My deadline' pluralized to 'deadlines' and verb phrase simplified. Improve by using correct articles, pluralization for countable nouns, and correct uncountable nouns. ID:22

× Oh definitely, I really want to see more park in my city because the the more and more park will make a city season can relax and recharge object their their battery. So I think that's so convenient with them.

✓ Oh definitely, I really want to see more parks in my city because more parks will help the city relax and allow people to recharge their energy. I think that's very convenient.

Errors: incorrect article and pluralization. 'More park' should be 'more parks' (plural). Awkward and incorrect phrasing 'make a city season can relax and recharge object their their battery' corrected to natural expression 'help the city relax' and 'allow people to recharge their energy.' Remove redundant words and fix pronoun use. Improve by using plural for countable nouns and clearer idiomatic expressions. ID:22

× No, there are not any park I want to go to in the future because whenever I go I always miss my country and the park when I was I enjoy and I really want to return to that park. I don't I don't need any park.

✓ No, there aren't any parks I want to go to in the future because whenever I go I always miss my country and the park I enjoyed, and I really want to return to that park. I don't need any other parks.

Errors: singular/plural mismatches and tense consistency. 'There are not any park' should be 'there aren't any parks.' 'The park when I was I enjoy' mixes tenses; use past 'the park I enjoyed.' 'I don't I don't need any park' should be 'I don't need any other parks.' Improve by matching plural/singular forms and keeping tense consistent. ID:1