Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your response more natural and concise: begin with a direct topic sentence, correct grammar (e.g. "nature" singular), and use one or two specific supporting details linked clearly. Avoid redundant phrases like "I did like" + "I loved."

例: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child. I especially liked exploring the trees and plants and riding my bike there with friends, which created happy memories.

提案: Improve grammar and coherence: start with a clear topic sentence, use correct expressions (e.g. "a small forest" not "soul forest"), and link ideas with a connector. Be specific about how parks help you and keep the answer within 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. There is a small forest near my neighborhood where I walk my dog; the greenery and fresh air help me relax and reduce stress after work.

提案: Be more precise and use correct vocabulary: replace vague phrases like "so poorest" with clearer descriptions (e.g. "limited facilities"). Provide a reason and one specific benefit of more parks, using a linking word to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I would. The parks near me have limited facilities, so I'd like more parks with different layouts and plant varieties so I can explore new places and enjoy more recreational options.

提案: Make the answer direct and grammatically correct: start with a clear response, correct errors ("I don't know which parks are the most popular"), and state a simple plan. Use a linking phrase to show intention and give one specific action you will take.

例: Not at the moment because I don't know which parks are the most popular, but I plan to research nearby parks online and visit a few this month to find new favorite spots.

× Yes, I did like going to parks when I was young since I like the natures and plants, trees.

✓ Yes, I liked going to parks when I was young because I liked nature and plants, such as trees.

Tense consistency and word choice: 'Did like' is unnecessary for simple past; use 'liked'. 'Since' can mean cause but 'because' is clearer. 'The natures' is incorrect: 'nature' is uncountable. 'Plants, trees' should be expressed as 'plants, such as trees' or 'plants and trees'. Ensure past tense throughout when referring to childhood.

× I loved going to parks, riding my bikes and chatting with my friends.

✓ I loved going to parks, riding my bike and chatting with my friends.

Number agreement in noun with activity: 'bikes' implies multiple bikes; when referring to the student's own bicycle, use singular 'my bike'. The gerund forms 'riding' and 'chatting' are correct. Ensure subject possession matches singular/plural.

× Yes, I'm also currently enjoying going to park actually there is a soul forest in my neighborhoods and I walk my dog there.

✓ Yes, I'm currently enjoying going to the park. Actually, there is a small forest in my neighborhood and I walk my dog there.

Article and word choice: 'going to park' needs the definite article 'the park' for a specific place. 'Also' is redundant with 'currently'. 'soul forest' seems to be a typo for 'small forest'. 'neighborhoods' should be singular 'neighborhood' if referring to where the student lives. Punctuation into two sentences improves clarity.

× Enjoying the plants, trees is so relaxing and I can also get the fresh air which reduce my stress.

✓ Enjoying the plants and trees is so relaxing, and I can also get fresh air, which reduces my stress.

Subject-verb agreement and relative clause verb form: 'which reduce my stress' should be 'which reduces my stress' because the noun 'fresh air' is singular. 'Enjoying the plants, trees' should use 'plants and trees' for coordination. Also remove 'the' before 'fresh air' because 'fresh air' is uncountable.

× I love it.

✓ I love it.

Sentence is correct. It expresses present preference appropriately; no change needed.

× Yes, of course I would love to see more parks in my city as I'm little bit bored about going the same place which is so poorest in my neighborhoods.

✓ Yes, of course I would love to see more parks in my city because I'm a little bored of going to the same place, which is one of the poorest in my neighborhood.

Article and adjective use, preposition choice: 'I'm little bit' should be 'I'm a little'. 'bored about' is incorrect; use 'bored of' or 'bored with'. 'going the same place' needs 'going to the same place'. 'so poorest' is wrong; use 'one of the poorest' for comparative. 'neighborhoods' should be singular if referring to the student's area.

× That's why I want to explore more parks, see different variety of plants and trees.

✓ That's why I want to explore more parks and see different varieties of plants and trees.

Count noun and parallel structure: 'different variety' is incorrect; use 'different varieties' (plural) or 'a different variety'. Also make the verbs parallel: 'explore more parks and see...'.

× Not really, it's because I don't know which parks is one of the most published and but I want to search more parks in the near future and I want to check and actually explore and visit the parks so I can feel more.

✓ Not really. It's because I don't know which parks are the most popular, but I want to look for more parks in the near future and actually explore and visit them so I can experience them more fully.

Multiple errors: subject-verb agreement 'which parks is' should be 'which parks are'. 'most published' is incorrect word choice; use 'most popular'. Remove redundant 'and' and improve verb collocation: 'search more parks' -> 'look for more parks'. 'check and actually explore and visit the parks' is repetitive; simplify to 'actually explore and visit them'. 'feel more' is vague; use 'experience them more fully'. Ensure punctuation and sentence splitting for clarity.