Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Старайтесь давать краткий и структурированный ответ: начните с прямого утверждения о своём отношении, затем добавьте 1–2 конкретных примера. Избегайте лишних повторов и ошибок времени (например, смешение past и present). Также улучшите грамматику («I liked» вместо «I really like» для детства) и порядок слов («do there plenty of activities» → «do plenty of activities there»).

例: I liked going to parks as a child. They were fun places where I could play on swings and ride my bike with friends, which helped me stay active and make memories.

提案: Работайте над беглостью и устранением заполнителей («umm», «uh») и завершённостью мысли. Давайте прямой ответ, затем конкретику: как часто и с кем вы ходите, чем занимаетесь. Исправьте грамматические ошибки и неполные предложения («when I have no homework and. Studies a lot of» → «when I have no homework and need a break from studying»).

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks. I usually go on weekends with my family or friends to relax, have a picnic or take a short walk when I need a break from studying.

提案: Упростите и проясните мысль: сначала ответьте прямо (yes/no), затем объясните причину. Избегайте повторов («because» три раза) и слова «funny» в неподходящем контексте. Сформулируйте чёткую позицию: либо вам достаточно парков в городе, либо вы предпочитаете видеть парки за границей, с объяснением почему.

例: I wouldn't necessarily want more parks in my city because we already have several good ones. Instead, I'd prefer to visit parks abroad to see different landscapes and plant varieties that we don't have at home.

提案: Давайте более связный и точный ответ: назовите место, даже если не знаете названия, опишите конкретно, что привлекает (например, цветы, ландшафт) и завершите мысль. Избегайте повторов и разговорных вставок («uh», «I don't actually»). Исправьте грамматику и порядок слов («it located in South of France» → «it's located in the south of France»).

例: Yes. I would like to visit a park in the south of France that I have seen in photos. The park looked full of colorful flowers and beautiful walking paths, and I think it would be a peaceful place to enjoy nature.

× Yes, I really like going to parks as a child and still today I love going there because it's a lot of fun and I can do there plenty of activities and hang out with my friends.

✓ Yes, I really liked going to parks as a child and still today I love going there because it's a lot of fun and I can do plenty of activities and hang out with my friends.

The sentence mixes past and present tenses incorrectly. 'As a child' indicates past, so 'like' should be 'liked'. Also the phrase 'do there plenty of activities' has wrong word order; 'do plenty of activities' is correct. Suggest using consistent tense and correct word order.' Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Yes, I still like going to parks umm, because it's a lot of fun and I can have a great time with my family and friends. Uh, normally I go to parks at weekends when I have no homework and. Studies a lot of.

✓ Yes, I still like going to parks because it's a lot of fun and I can have a great time with my family and friends. Normally I go to parks at weekends when I have no homework and I can relax or study less.

The fragment 'and. Studies a lot of.' is ungrammatical and unclear. 'Studies a lot of' is wrong form and missing subject; likely intended meaning is that they do not study much on weekends. Also remove filler 'umm' and 'Uh' for clarity. Ensure complete clause with subject and verb.' Grammar problem type ID: 6

× I wouldn't say that I would like to see more parks because I would like to see the parks abroad somewhere, because I've seen many parks in my hometown, in my city, because it was funny.

✓ I wouldn't say that I want more parks here because I would rather see parks abroad; I've already seen many parks in my hometown and my city, and I enjoyed them.

Sentence repeats 'would' and 'because' too often and uses 'because it was funny' which is odd. 'Would like' repetition makes structure awkward. Rephrase to concise structure and use 'enjoyed' instead of 'funny' to express positive experience. Remove redundant clauses.' Grammar problem type ID: 26

× Yes, there is, uh, actually it located in South of France.

✓ Yes, there is. Actually, it is located in the south of France.

Missing verb 'is' after 'it' and incorrect capitalization/usage of 'South of France'. Use 'the south of France' and include the linking verb 'is located'. Also avoid fillers for clarity.' Grammar problem type ID: 3

× I don't actually, I don't remember the name of the park, but it is in France. Uh, I see I've seen many picture of the nature and beautiful parks there.

✓ I don't actually remember the name of the park, but it is in France. I've seen many pictures of the natural scenery and beautiful parks there.

Redundant 'I don't actually, I don't remember' — remove duplication. 'I've seen many picture' uses singular 'picture' incorrectly; should be plural 'pictures'. 'Of the nature' is unnatural; use 'natural scenery' or 'nature' without 'the'. Also keep present perfect 'I've seen' consistent. Remove filler 'Uh'.' Grammar problem type ID: 5

× Uh, there are also plenty of flowers, so I think it gives some special.

✓ There are also plenty of flowers, so I think it makes the place special.

Phrase 'it gives some special' is incomplete and uses 'gives' with an adjective incorrectly. Use 'makes the place special' or 'gives it a special atmosphere' to complete the idea and correct verb-object usage. Remove filler 'Uh'.' Grammar problem type ID: 12