Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cải thiện phát âm và ngữ pháp cơ bản; trả lời trực tiếp bằng một câu chủ đề rõ ràng, tránh câu lặp và thông tin không liên quan; bổ sung các chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ hoạt động bạn làm ở công viên) và dùng liên từ để mạch lạc.

例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I used to go there every weekend with my father, where we would fly kites and play football together. These outings were very special to me because they helped us bond and created lasting happy memories.

提案: Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp và sắp xếp câu cho tự nhiên; tránh lặp từ; dùng liên từ để nối ý; cung cấp thông tin cụ thể về hoạt động hoặc cảm xúc khi đi công viên.

例: Yes, I still enjoy visiting parks. Usually my best friend and I go on weekends; we have breakfast together and then walk around the park while catching up about our work and plans for the weekend. This routine helps me relax and recharge.

提案: Trình bày ý rõ ràng và hoàn chỉnh; sửa ngữ pháp (số nhiều/ít, word order) và câu cuối thiếu hoàn chỉnh; đưa ví dụ cụ thể về lợi ích (ví dụ: không gian để tập thể dục, khu vui chơi cho trẻ).

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they provide public space where people can exercise, relax and spend time with family. For example, new parks with playgrounds and walking trails would give children a safe place to play and help adults unwind after a long workday.

提案: Cải thiện cấu trúc câu và trật tự thông tin; tránh lặp và tiếng đệm (uh, I really); nêu tên cụ thể hoặc mô tả rõ hơn và lý do vì sao muốn đến; dùng liên từ để liệt kê động vật một cách đúng ngữ pháp.

例: Yes, I would love to visit a large park in Hanoi that I have heard about, which includes a zoo area. It houses animals like giraffes, lions and tigers, and I am especially keen to see the seals. I want to go there with my family because it would be both entertaining and educational for everyone.

× Yes, when I washed dry.

✓ Yes, when I was a child.

The original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. It likely attempts to refer to childhood; use a time clause 'when I was a child.' This provides a clear subject-verb structure and correct tense.

× Going to parks is my favorite part of my life.

✓ Going to parks was my favorite part of my childhood.

The speaker refers to childhood, so the past tense 'was' is appropriate. Also 'part of my life' is vague; specify 'childhood' to match context.

× I always go there with my father.

✓ I always went there with my father.

Because the context is childhood, use past simple 'went' instead of present 'go.' The preposition 'with' is correct.

× We have so much fun in there and it was a nice memory of my life.

✓ We had so much fun there, and it is a nice memory of my life.

For past experience, use past 'had' and omit 'in' before 'there.' 'It is a nice memory' keeps the memory present; alternatively 'it was a nice memory' is also acceptable but mixing past and present is inconsistent. Use consistent verb tense.

× Yes, I usually go to the park at the weekend with my best friend.

✓ Yes, I usually go to the park at the weekend with my best friend.

This sentence is grammatically correct. No change needed. (Kept present habitual tense appropriate for current habits.)

× We always wake up at the morning in the morning and have breakfast.

✓ We always wake up in the morning and have breakfast.

Use 'in the morning' not 'at the morning.' Remove the repeated phrase 'in the morning.'

× While walking around the parks we always chat about what we have in all the all the weekend about the work.

✓ While walking around the park, we always chat about what we did over the weekend and about work.

The original is repetitive and has incorrect tense and prepositions. Use past 'did' for activities that happened over the past weekend or 'will do' for future; 'over the weekend' is the correct phrase. Also remove duplicate 'all the' and use singular 'park' if referring to the place they visit.

× Yes, I really prefer to see more parks in my city because it has more place for everyone to reduce their stress after the hard working day and we can go with our family and enjoy an evening.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because there would be more space for everyone to reduce their stress after a hard day's work, and we could go with our family and enjoy an evening.

'Prefer to see' is awkward; 'would like to see' is more natural for wishes. Use 'space' not 'place' in this context. 'After a hard working day' should be 'after a hard day's work.' Use conditional/modal 'would/could' to express possibility and desire.

× A beautiful evening with my.

✓ I imagine having a beautiful evening with my family.

The original is a sentence fragment missing the object. Expand to a complete sentence with subject and verb and specify 'family.'

× Yes, there is park.

✓ Yes, there is a park.

'Park' is a singular countable noun and requires the indefinite article 'a.'

× I really want to go in the future uh this park located in Hanoi city,

✓ I really want to go in the future to the park located in Hanoi city,

Add the preposition 'to' after 'go' when indicating destination. Use a comma or restructure sentence to improve flow.

× It has a lot of wild animal such as a giraffe, lion, tiger are my favorite animal is seal.

✓ It has a lot of wild animals such as giraffes, lions, and tigers; my favorite animal is the seal.

Use plural 'animals' with 'a lot of.' Use plural forms for the list (giraffes, lions, tigers). Separate the clause about a favorite animal with a semicolon or new sentence and include the definite article 'the' before 'seal' when specifying a particular favorite.

× I really I really want to go there with my family.

✓ I really want to go there with my family.

Remove the duplicated phrase 'I really.' Use present simple 'want' for desire about the future; this is acceptable. Alternatively 'I really want to go there with my family in the future.'