Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời cần rõ ràng hơn, dùng thì và ngữ pháp chính xác, tránh từ lặp và các lỗi phát âm/ cấu trúc. Hãy mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề trực tiếp, sau đó cung cấp 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: hoạt động bạn làm, cảm xúc) và dùng từ nối thích hợp (because, so, for example). Tránh những cụm từ không chính xác như “as a trial”, “give me” (phải là gives me) và “working pair times”.

例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because they gave me fresh air and a natural atmosphere. For example, I often played football with my friends there, which helped me stay active and happy.

提案: Cần rút gọn và sửa lỗi ngữ pháp/động từ (gives, makes) để câu tự nhiên hơn. Bắt đầu với câu chủ đề ngắn, sau đó nêu lí do rõ ràng và một ví dụ cụ thể. Dùng liên từ như because, so và tránh lặp từ (relax, make me relax).

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, especially at weekends, because they give me a peaceful environment to unwind. For instance, I like to sit by a pond and read a book, which helps me reduce stress after a busy week.

提案: Cần câu trả lời rõ ràng, logic và tránh nói lắp. Sử dụng cấu trúc đơn giản: chủ đề + lí do + ví dụ/ kết quả. Sửa lỗi ngữ pháp (green spaces, de-stress, unwind, parks are) và tránh lặp từ. Nên nêu cụ thể lợi ích cho cộng đồng (ví dụ: cải thiện sức khỏe tinh thần, không gian tụ tập).

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because green spaces help people de-stress and promote social interactions. For example, new parks could host weekend events and encourage neighbors to meet and exercise together.

提案: Câu trả lời cần rõ ràng và hoàn chỉnh. Xác định tên công viên đúng (ví dụ: Cúc Phương National Park?), sửa lỗi từ và ngữ pháp (it provides, natural carbon? → natural environment), hoàn thành ý (dangerous species like ...). Nên nêu một hoặc hai lý do cụ thể: không khí trong lành, động thực vật, hoạt động tham quan. Giữ tối đa 3-4 câu.

例: I would like to visit Cuc Phuong National Park in the future because it offers a pristine natural environment and clean air. I am also interested in seeing rare wildlife there, such as primates and many bird species, and learning about conservation efforts.

× Actually, as a trial, I believe that going to the park give me fresh air and a natural atmosphere.

✓ Actually, as a child, I believed that going to the park gave me fresh air and a natural atmosphere.

The speaker refers to past habitual action 'as a child', so past tense should be used. Use 'believed' (past of 'believe') and 'gave' (past of 'give'). Also 'as a trial' is unnatural; replace with 'as a child'. Suggestion: Match verb tense to time frame; for past habits use past simple (believed, gave).

× Also it's give me a totally free environment for me to play in sport and the park is a play that's I usually go to to react after my working pair times and escape the hustle and bustle.

✓ Also it gave me a totally free environment for playing sports, and the park was a place I usually went to to relax after work and escape the hustle and bustle.

Pronouns and phrasing are incorrect: 'it's' conflicts with past context and should be 'it gave'. 'For me to play in sport' is awkward; use 'for playing sports'. 'The park is a play' should be 'the park was a place'. 'React' is wrong word; use 'relax'. 'Working pair times' is unclear; use 'after work'. Suggestion: Use correct pronouns and idiomatic phrases, and keep tense consistent with past context.

× Actually yes, I would like to go to the park at weekends or whenever in my free time to relax after the working time and escape the hustle and bustle of the city because it's give me a peaceful environment that's make me feel chill and make me relax and reduce my stress.

✓ Actually, yes, I like to go to the park at weekends or whenever I have free time to relax after work and escape the hustle and bustle of the city because it gives me a peaceful environment that makes me feel calm, helps me relax, and reduces my stress.

The original mixes conditional 'would like' with general present habit; use simple present 'like' for habitual actions. Verbs must agree: 'it gives' and 'makes' (third person singular). Use 'calm' instead of 'chill' in formal speech and keep parallel verb forms: 'helps me relax' and 'reduces my stress'. Suggestion: For routines use simple present and ensure subject-verb agreement (adds 's' for he/she/it).

× Actually, yes, I think that, uh, Greenland cities help people there become more friendly is more peaceful because it helps them to distress and unwinds after the hard working times makes them become more friendly.

✓ Actually, yes, I think that green spaces in cities help people become friendlier and more peaceful because they help them de-stress and unwind after hard work, which makes them friendlier.

Multiple issues: 'Greenland cities' likely meant 'green spaces in cities'. Use plural agreement 'help' with plural subject. Use gerunds correctly: 'de-stress' and 'unwind' (base forms) after 'help'. 'Makes them become more friendly' is redundant; simplify to 'which makes them friendlier'. Suggestion: Use correct noun phrases ('green spaces'), ensure verbs after 'help' are in base form, and avoid repetition.

× So I believe that if there's more park in the city is, will be nicer and it's, it's a incredible things for me.

✓ So I believe that if there were more parks in the city, it would be nicer and it would be an incredible thing for me.

Conditional structure is incorrect: use second conditional for hypothetical present situations: 'if there were' + 'would'. 'More park' should be plural 'parks'. Article usage: 'an incredible thing' instead of 'a incredible things'. Suggestion: Use correct conditional forms and plural nouns; check article-noun agreement ('an' before vowel sound, singular/plural consistency).

× If they a place that I have to go, it should be the cooking National Park.

✓ If there is one place I have to go, it should be the Cuckoo National Park.

Sentence missing verb 'is' after 'they'; unclear proper noun 'cooking' likely misheard—replace with intended park name (example 'Cuckoo'). Use 'there is one place' for clarity and singular reference. Suggestion: Ensure sentences include a verb and use correct place names; use 'there is' for existence statements.

× First of all, with carbon natural, it's provide me a fresh and a clean air atmosphere that's other place cannot provide me.

✓ First of all, with its natural carbon-rich environment, it provides me with fresh, clean air that other places cannot provide.

Grammar: 'it's provide' should be 'it provides' (third person singular). 'A fresh and a clean air atmosphere' is unidiomatic; use 'fresh, clean air'. 'Carbon natural' is awkward; 'natural carbon-rich environment' or 'natural environment' depending on meaning. Suggestion: Use correct verb form 'provides' and natural adjective order; omit unnecessary articles before uncountable nouns like 'air'.

× And also in the cooking national National Park, I can learn about the in dangerous species like or.

✓ Also, in the Cuckoo National Park, I can learn about endangered species.

Pronoun and noun errors: 'the in dangerous species like or' is garbled. Use 'endangered species' correctly. Remove redundant repeated 'National'. Suggestion: Use correct collocations ('endangered species') and avoid repetition; ensure sentence ends with a clear object.