Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答需要更直接并且语法准确。先用一句话回答问题（肯定或否定），然后提供一至两句具体细节作为支持。注意时态一致（过去时）、主谓一致，以及去掉冗余与重复。可练习使用简单的连接词如“because”和“for example”。

例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because being outdoors made me feel relaxed. For example, I often played games with my family, such as throwing a ball, and we spent hours walking around the park.

提案: 回答含糊且有许多不相关或错误的表达。先直接回答（现在时），然后给出一两个清晰的理由或具体活动。避免无关细节（例如“apologize”和“accomplishment”在此不清楚）。练习用连词如“because”或“and”来组织句子，并注意人称和时态一致。

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they help me relax and exercise. For instance, next Sunday my best friend and I plan to walk around the park and enjoy the fresh air.

提案: 回答与问题关联性不强，内容偏离主题。应先明确表示愿望（想或不想），然后给出具体原因或期望（例如更多绿地、更好设施）。避免与网络浏览或朋友关系无关的泛泛陈述。使用连接词（because, so, therefore）让表达更连贯。

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they provide green space and improve residents' health. For example, new parks with playgrounds and walking trails would encourage more outdoor activities.

提案: 回答较为模糊且有语法错误。应先给出肯定或否定，并说明具体想去的公园或类型（例如有湖泊、山景的公园）。提供一两个具体理由并使用合适时态与词形（例如“attracted”或“attractive”）。减少填充词“umm”。

例: Yes, I would like to visit more parks in the future. Last weekend I discovered a park with beautiful natural scenery, and I was very attracted to its lakes and walking paths, so I hope to explore similar parks to feel happier and relaxed.

× Yeah, I definitely.

✓ Yeah, definitely.

句子缺少谓语，且“definitely”不单独作为完整回答。应省略不必要的主语或补充动词，如“Yes, I definitely did.”或简洁回答“Yeah, definitely.”。建议用简短肯定回答或补全动词。

× I like going to parks when I was a child because the outside can makes me feel relaxing, such as I can play around the city and play a catch with my family and I'm enjoying it.

✓ I liked going to parks when I was a child because being outside made me feel relaxed. I could play around the neighbourhood and play catch with my family, and I enjoyed it.

原句时态混用（现在时“I like”与过去时间“when I was a child”矛盾），动词形式错误（“can makes”应为“made”），形容词/副词使用错误（“relaxing”应为“relaxed”表示感受）。建议：叙述过去习惯用一般过去时，动词保持一致，形容词用来描述感受时用过去分词或形容词。

× Yeah, I actually still like going to parks now I just remember next Sunday I will apologize and get accomplishment from my best friend and we decide to spend all the time to around the park and feel the wind we are.

✓ Yeah, I actually still like going to parks now. I remember next Sunday I will apologize to my best friend and receive forgiveness, and we have decided to spend the whole day walking around the park and enjoying the breeze.

原句有时态和用法混乱：先用现在时描述喜好，然后混入未来计划。动词搭配错误（“apologize and get accomplishment”意不明，改为“apologize... and receive forgiveness”），“decide”应与过去或现在完成时一致（改为“have decided”或“decide”并调整结构），“spend all the time to around the park”语法错误，正确为“spend the whole day walking around the park”。建议：明确时间线并使用合适的时态和短语搭配。

× Oh yeah, to be honest the Internet is very widely and I often see the different parks on Internet and look for more interesting with my friends.

✓ Oh yeah, to be honest the Internet is very widespread and I often see different parks on the Internet and look for more interesting ones with my friends.

“very widely”用法错误，应为形容词“widespread”。“on Internet”缺定冠词，应为“on the Internet”。“look for more interesting”缺宾语，需加“ones”。建议：注意形容词/副词的使用，以及固定搭配（on the Internet）和代词指代完整。

× So my friend is my good partner.

✓ So my friend is a good companion.

原句语义虽可理解但用词不自然，“my good partner”在此语境更自然的表达为“a good companion”或“a good partner”取决于语境。建议用更地道的搭配。

× Oh yeah it definitely, I found a park with natural scenery last weekend and the beautiful scenery are attracts me a lot.

✓ Oh yeah, definitely. I found a park with natural scenery last weekend, and the beautiful scenery attracted me a lot.

句首表达“it definitely”不完整，应为“definitely”。句中时态应为过去时“found”和“attracted”，且“scenery”为不可数名词，不能用复数谓语“are attracts”，应改为单数形式并用过去式。建议：注意不可数名词的单复数和动词时态一致。

× Umm, I think I can umm find more parks in the future because I think the things makes me feel happy.

✓ Umm, I think I can find more parks in the future because I think these things make me feel happy.

主谓不一致：复数主语“these things”需用动词复数形式“make”，原句“the things makes”时态和主谓数不匹配。建议：用“these things”或“those things”指代复数，并确保动词为复数形式。