Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cevap daha net bir konu cümlesiyle başlamalı, dolayısıyla gereksiz tekrarlar ve duraksamalar azaltılmalıdır. Detay verirken ‘yacht for park’ gibi belirsiz ifadeler yerine daha spesifik tanımlamalar kullanın (ör. bir gölet veya çocuk oyun alanı). Bağlaçlarla cümlenizi genişletin ve maksimum 5 cümleyi aşmayın.

例: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child. In particular, my local park had a small lake with paddle boats which I loved. I often went there with my parents on weekends, and we usually had picnics by the water. Those visits are some of my fondest childhood memories.

提案: Cümleleri daha açık ve akıcı kurun; gereksiz 'uh' seslerini azaltın. Net bir konu cümlesiyle başlayın (ör. ‘I don’t usually go to parks alone’), sonra gerekçenizi bağlaçlarla açıklayın ve mümkünse alternatifleri belirtin. Dilbilgisi hatalarını düzeltin (want to go, we are usually busy vs 'is as we're always').

例: I don't usually go to parks alone because I prefer spending my free time with friends. My girlfriend and I are often busy, so we rarely visit parks together. Instead, we tend to choose indoor activities or cafes when we have free time.

提案: Cevabınızı doğrudan belirtin ve nedenlerinizi açık, spesifik örneklerle destekleyin. 'Exorcist' kelimesi bağlama uymuyor; muhtemelen 'exercise' demek istemişsiniz. Bağlaçlar kullanarak neden-sonuç ilişkisini güçlendirin ve 3-4 kısa cümleyle sınırlandırın.

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they provide space for exercise and outdoor activities. For example, people could go running, practice yoga, or play team sports. More parks would also improve air quality and offer a place for families to relax.

提案: Cevabı daha düzenli ve dilbilgisi kurallarına uygun verin. 'Aqua park' gibi yer isimlerini tanımlayın ve neden gitmek istediğinizi spesifik olarak açıklayın (ör. su kaydırakları, eğlence, iklim). Gereksiz tekrar ve duraksamalardan kaçının.

例: Yes, I would love to visit an aqua park in the future, especially the one in Dubai. It is famous for its large water slides and modern attractions, and I think it would be a lot of fun. I hope to go there on a holiday with friends.

× Yes, of course. Uh, I like going to park as a child, uh, especially there was a yacht for park in the city where I lived.

✓ Yes, of course. I liked going to the park as a child, especially there was a yacht at the park in the city where I lived.

The noun 'park' needs the definite article 'the' when referring to a specific park. Also, the sentence refers to a past habit, so 'liked' fits the past tense context. Use 'at the park' rather than 'for park' to indicate location. Suggestion: use 'I liked going to the park as a child' and 'there was a yacht at the park'. Grammar problem type ID: 22

× Uh, I don't prefer going to parks, uh, alone.

✓ I don't prefer going to parks alone.

The original sentence is mostly acceptable but has extra pauses and redundant commas. Keep the present simple 'don't prefer' for current habit. Remove unnecessary commas and filler words for clarity. Suggestion: say 'I don't prefer going to parks alone.' Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Uh, and I can't say that my girlfriend wants to going to, uh, park together.

✓ I can't say that my girlfriend wants to go to the park with me.

Use the base form 'go' after 'wants to' (not 'wants to going'). Use the definite article 'the' when referring to a specific park in context, and use 'with me' for clarity rather than 'together.' Suggestion: 'My girlfriend wants to go to the park with me.' Grammar problem type ID: 12

× Uh, is as we're always, yes.

✓ I mean, we usually go together, yes.

The original fragment is ungrammatical and unclear. Rephrase to a complete clause: 'we usually go together' fits the intended meaning that they often go as a pair. Suggestion: use clear phrases like 'I mean, we usually go together.' Grammar problem type ID: 26},{