Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cevabınız açık ama biraz düzensiz ve tekrarlayıcı. Daha doğal olmak için gereksiz tekrarları çıkarın, net bir konu cümlesi kurun ve bir-iki destekleyici detay ekleyin. Ayrıca dolgu kelimelerini azaltın ve zaman uyumuna dikkat edin (past tense kullandığınız için tüm cümlede geçmiş zaman tercih edin).

例: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks when I was a child because I loved playing games there. For example, I often played hide-and-seek with my friends and tried different playground equipment, which made the visits really fun.

提案: Cevap kısa ve biraz belirsiz; "changed my routine" ne anlama geldiğini açıklayın. Ayrıca gündelik ifadeleri ("you know") azaltın ve nedenleri bağlaçlarla bağlayarak daha mantıklı açıklayın. Maksimum 3–4 cümleyle net bir görüş ve bir örnek verin.

例: Yes, I still like going to parks, but my routine has changed; these days I usually go to relax rather than to play. For instance, I often sit on a bench to read or listen to music because I find it peaceful after work.

提案: İyi bir fikir sundunuz ama dil bilgisi hataları ve tekrar var. Tek cümlede fikri belirtin, sonra nedenini bağlaçlarla açıklayın ve spesifik bir fayda ekleyin. "is" yerine "are" gibi uyuma dikkat edin. Gereksiz eklemeleri çıkarın.

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because green spaces are better than busy streets. They are more relaxing, improve air quality, and provide safe places for families to exercise and socialize.

提案: Cevabınız kararsız ve eksik; doğrudan soruyu yanıtlayıp gerekçenizi kısa ve mantıklı bir şekilde verin. "I don't know any parks" yerine daha doğal ifadeler kullanın (e.g. "I'm not familiar with many parks in my area"). Ayrıca olumlu bir alternatif sunun: gezilecek park türleri ya da koşullar belirtin.

例: I don't have a specific park in mind because I'm not familiar with many parks in my area. However, I'm open to visiting parks in the future, especially ones with walking trails or picnic areas if I have the chance.

× Yes, I did in my childhood.

✓ Yes, I did when I was a child.

The student used 'in my childhood' which is not incorrect but unnatural. Use 'when I was a child' for clearer English. Also 'Yes, I did' is acceptable but adding the clause 'when I was a child' clarifies time reference. Suggestion: replace 'in my childhood' with 'when I was a child' for natural phrasing.

× Childhood.

✓ (Remove this fragment)

Single word 'Childhood.' is a sentence fragment and does not form a complete sentence. It should be integrated into the previous sentence or removed. Suggestion: say 'I loved going to parks in my childhood' or delete the fragment.

× Uh, I love going to parks because I like to play some games in the parks.

✓ I loved going to parks because I liked playing games there.

The student mixes present and past. The question asked about childhood, so past tense should be used. Use past tense verbs ('loved', 'liked') and use 'playing' (verb + -ing) after 'liked' for activities. Also 'in the parks' is awkward; 'there' is more natural. Suggestion: keep tense consistent and use gerund after verbs like 'like'.

× Yes, I do, but I changed my routine.

✓ Yes, I do, but I have changed my routine.

The student uses simple past 'changed' while the context (now) implies a change that affects the present. Use present perfect 'have changed' to show a past action with present relevance. Suggestion: say 'I have changed my routine' when describing a recent or relevant change.

× I'm just sitting around looking for something new and chilling, you know?

✓ I'm just sitting around, looking for something new and relaxing, you know?

'Chilling' is informal and can be acceptable, but in this context 'relaxing' is clearer. The comma separates actions. 'Looking for something new and chilling' could imply both verbs modify 'something'; use 'relaxing' as adjective. Suggestion: use 'relaxing' or keep 'chilling' in casual speech; ensure punctuation clarity.

× Yes, I would like, I would like to see new parks because the park areas is much better than streets, It's more relaxing or.

✓ Yes, I would like to see new parks because park areas are much better than streets; they are more relaxing.

Errors: repeated phrase 'I would like' is redundant. 'The park areas is' has subject-verb agreement error; plural 'areas' needs 'are'. 'It's more relaxing or' is incomplete and colloquial. Suggestion: remove repetition, use 'park areas are', and finish the idea with 'they are more relaxing.'

× No, because I don't know any parks in my life.

✓ No, because I don't know of any parks in my area.

'In my life' is incorrect here; it implies lifetime experience. The student likely means 'in my area' or 'near me'. Use 'know of' when referring to awareness. Suggestion: use 'I don't know of any parks in my area' for clarity.

× I just don't think about it.

✓ I just don't think about them.

Pronoun reference: 'it' is vague; grammatically refer to 'parks' (plural), so use 'them'. Suggestion: use correct pronoun matching number and clear reference.

× But uh, I'm not negative about that.

✓ But I'm not opposed to that.

'Not negative about that' is awkward. Use 'not opposed to that' or 'not against it' to express willingness. Suggestion: use standard expressions like 'not opposed to'.

× If I go somewhere there's a park, I would go.

✓ If I go somewhere that has a park, I will go.

Mixed conditional/modal issue: 'If I go... I would go' mixes present simple with conditional 'would'. For a real future possibility use 'will'. Also clause order and clarity improved: 'somewhere that has a park'. Suggestion: use 'If I go somewhere that has a park, I'll go.'