Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Clarify and organize your response. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then give one or two specific supporting details. Use correct verb forms and simple connector words to make the meaning clear.

例: Yes, I liked going to parks when I was a child. I often went there with my mother because it was relaxing and we could meet other people from our neighborhood. I especially enjoyed playing on the swings and feeding the ducks.

提案: Use correct tense and clearer vocabulary. Give a concise reason and one specific detail about your routine. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' properly and avoid unclear phrases.

例: Yes, I still go to the park every day because I walk there for about 30 minutes to stay healthy. I usually meet neighbors and sometimes do light exercises, which helps me feel refreshed.

提案: Answer directly and explain why more parks are needed, using clearer vocabulary (e.g., 'places', 'green spaces'). Provide a specific reason and one example of benefit to residents.

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because there are many new buildings and few green spaces. More parks would give people places to relax and children places to play, which would improve air quality and community life.

提案: Be specific about which park and why you want to visit. Use clear descriptions and connect your ideas with linking phrases. Avoid vague phrases like 'look at the wheel'—name the attraction if possible.

例: In the future, I would like to visit Griffith Park in Los Angeles because I have seen photos of the observatory and panoramic city views online. I think hiking there and seeing the skyline would be an exciting experience.

× Yes I did when I was a kid I went to war with my mom because is can relax and see a new people around my neighborhood.

✓ Yes, I did. When I was a kid, I went to the park with my mom because it was relaxing and I could see new people around my neighborhood.

Multiple past tense and word choice problems: 'went to war' is incorrect word choice (should be 'went to the park'). 'is can relax' mixes present and modal forms; in past context use 'it was relaxing' and 'I could' (past ability). 'a new people' is incorrect article and plural noun; use 'new people' or 'a new person'. Suggestion: keep past tense consistently, use correct nouns and modal forms. Grammar problem type ID: 5

× Yeah, I still going to park every day because I can go for war social 30 minute for my healthy which allow me to resume my ways.

✓ Yeah, I still go to the park every day because I can go for a 30-minute walk for my health, which allows me to resume my routine.

Incorrect verb form 'still going' should be simple present 'still go' for habitual action. 'go to park' needs article 'the park'. 'go for war social' is wrong word choices; likely 'go for a social walk' or simply 'go for a 30-minute walk'. '30 minute' needs hyphen as adjective '30-minute' and 'my healthy' should be 'my health'. 'which allow' must agree 'which allows' (subject-verb agreement). Suggestion: use simple present for routines, correct article usage, choose appropriate nouns and ensure subject-verb agreement. Grammar_problem_type_id: 6

× Actually I want to see more pots because today there are many buildings which allows me to see some green trees and close to the nature.

✓ Actually I want to see more parks because there are many buildings now, so I would like to see more green trees and be closer to nature.

Wrong word 'pots' should be 'parks'. 'today there are many buildings which allows me to see' is ungrammatical and mismatched: 'there are many buildings now, so I would like' is clearer. 'close to the nature' should be 'closer to nature' (no article with 'nature' here). Also 'allows me to see' is awkward; better to express desire. Suggestion: use correct noun 'parks', simplify sentence structure and use comparative 'closer to nature'. Grammar_problem_type_id: 13

× In the future, I want to go to a park in LA. That's very interesting. When I see people on the Internet sit and look at the wheel, I think it's very cool.

✓ In the future, I want to go to a park in LA. That sounds very interesting. When I see people on the Internet sitting and looking at the Ferris wheel, I think it's very cool.

Tense and form issues: 'That's very interesting' is acceptable but 'That sounds very interesting' fits better. 'see people on the Internet sit and look' needs gerunds 'sitting and looking' after 'see' when describing ongoing actions. 'the wheel' is vague; likely 'the Ferris wheel'. Suggestion: use gerund forms for ongoing activities and choose precise nouns; adjust the comment phrase to match speaker intention. Grammar_problem_type_id: 6