Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and correct grammar: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid unnecessary phrases like 'As for me', use correct verb forms and concise details. Add one specific memory with linking word to enrich the answer. Keep to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. For example, my aunt and I would walk in the nearby park every weekend, where we fed ducks and played on the swings.

提案: Avoid repeating the previous answer and correct sentence structure. Give a clear frequency phrase and a reason using a linking word. Remove fillers and finish sentences fully.

例: Yes, I still enjoy visiting parks; I go about every two weeks because they are peaceful and good for exercise.

提案: Answer directly, reduce hesitations ('umm') and support your opinion with a brief reason or comparison. Use linking words to connect your points and be specific about why the current number is sufficient.

例: No, I wouldn’t want more parks because each neighborhood already has one, which makes green space accessible and well distributed across the city.

提案: Be specific and clear about the park name and why you want to visit. Avoid repetition and unclear names; if a park has an English name, use it accurately. Provide one or two specific activities you plan to do there.

例: Yes, I’d like to visit Moscow Sparks and especially the Barbie of Agori, because it has a large lake and scenic paths where I can walk with friends or relax alone.

× I remember how my aunt and I walking in the parks every weekend and also I have a lot of parks near my house and near my apartment.

✓ I remember how my aunt and I used to walk in the parks every weekend, and I had a lot of parks near my house and my apartment.

This sentence has an incorrect verb form after 'remember how' and inconsistent tense. 'walking' is a present participle but the context refers to past habitual action; use 'used to walk' or 'walked'. Also 'have' should be past 'had' to match 'as a child'. Split ideas with a comma and use parallel possessives for clarity. Grammar problem type ID: 10

× As I said at the first question, I have a lot of parks near my home, so yes, I do it I think every two weekends or once a month. So it's so wonderful for.

✓ As I said in the first question, I have a lot of parks near my home, so yes, I go there about every two weeks or once a month. It's wonderful.

Preposition 'at' is incorrect with 'the first question'—use 'in'. 'Do it' is vague; use 'go there'. 'Every two weekends' is nonstandard—use 'every two weeks'. Remove the extraneous 'for' and redundant 'so'. Ensure adverb placement: 'about every two weeks'. Grammar problem type ID: 6

× Actually, in my city we have a lot of parks, umm, and in every neighborhood we have one park.

✓ Actually, in my city we have a lot of parks, and every neighborhood has at least one park.

Use more natural subject-verb order: 'every neighborhood has'. 'In every neighborhood we have one park' is awkward; change to 'every neighborhood has at least one park' for clarity and idiomatic usage. This fixes preposition/structure issues. Grammar problem type ID: 11

× I truly like Moscow Sparks. So yeah, I think my favorite one is the Barbie of Agori, and this is my favorite place for walking with friends or alone, so I think yeah.

✓ I really like Moscow parks. I think my favorite one is the Park of Agori, and it is my favorite place to walk with friends or alone.

'Sparks' is likely a misspelling of 'parks' and 'Moscow' should be followed by the common noun 'parks' without capitalization for 'parks'. 'The Barbie of Agori' seems incorrect; use 'Park of Agori' or the correct park name. 'Truly like' is acceptable but 'really like' is more natural. Use 'place to walk' rather than 'place for walking'. Also remove filler 'so I think yeah' for clarity. This fixes article/name and adjective usage. Grammar problem type ID: 13

× I remember how my aunt and I walking in the parks every weekend and also I have a lot of parks near my house and near my apartment.

✓ I remember how my aunt and I used to walk in the park every weekend, and I had many parks near my house and my apartment.

The phrase 'in the parks' can be plural or singular; if referring to habitual visits to a local park, 'in the park' is more natural. Also 'a lot of parks' is plural but later 'near my house and near my apartment' sounds redundant—combine and clarify. Use 'many parks' if plural intended. This addresses singular/plural nuance. Grammar problem type ID: 12

× As for me, yes I liked going to parks as a child.

✓ Yes, I liked going to parks as a child.

'As for me' is unnecessary and can make the sentence wordy; remove it for a more natural response. Pronoun use is fine but the phrase is redundant in context. Grammar problem type ID: 16

× So it's so wonderful for.

✓ It's wonderful.

The original fragment 'It's so wonderful for.' is incomplete and uses the conjunction 'for' incorrectly. Remove 'for' and the sentence becomes a complete, natural comment. This fixes sentence structure and conjunction misuse.