Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and grammatically correct: state a clear topic sentence, give one or two specific reasons with linking words, and use past tense consistently. Avoid vague phrases like "I don't usually" without context. Also correct vocabulary and articles (e.g., "a park").

例: No, I didn't like going to parks when I was a child because my family rarely had time for outings and we had very little money. As a result, I stayed home most weekends and played with toys instead.

提案: Answer directly, avoid repeating the question, and use correct tense and phrasing. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give a specific reason and an example. Use linking words (e.g., "because", "so") and correct articles ("the park" or "parks").

例: Yes, I enjoy going to parks now because they help me relax and clear my mind. For example, I often walk in the park after work to unwind, and the fresh air and greenery make me feel more focused.

提案: Be precise about your preference and use correct tense and reasons. Provide a brief specific benefit or reason and avoid vague statements like "because I wanted to." Use linking words to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they provide recreational space and improve air quality. For instance, additional parks would give families places to exercise and children somewhere safe to play.

提案: Clarify your response and correct vocabulary mistakes ("parks" not "perks"). Start with a clear sentence stating whether you have any specific parks in mind, then add a brief reason or plan. Keep it concise and coherent.

例: I don't have any specific parks in mind right now, but I would like to visit a large botanical garden or a national park in the future because I enjoy nature and photography.

× No, I didn't like going to park when I was a child because I don't usually. I don't have money.

✓ No, I didn't like going to parks when I was a child because I didn't usually. I didn't have money.

The noun 'park' should be plural 'parks' to match the general activity 'going to parks'. Also tense inconsistency: the sentence describes the past, so 'don't usually' and 'don't have' must be changed to past forms 'didn't usually' and 'didn't have'. Use consistent past tense when talking about past habits. Suggestion: Use plural for general places ('parks') and keep verbs in past tense for past habits ('didn't usually', 'didn't have').

× Do you still like going to parks now? Yes, I still like going to parks now. Since I am I grow older, I realize that going to park makes my brain fresh.

✓ Yes, I still like going to parks now. As I have grown older, I realize that going to parks refreshes my mind.

Sentence had several problems: remove duplicate question echo and keep only answer. 'Since I am I grow older' is ungrammatical; use present perfect 'have grown older' to indicate change over time. 'Going to park' needs plural 'parks' for general reference. 'Makes my brain fresh' is awkward and unidiomatic; use 'refreshes my mind' and match present simple 'refreshes' for a general truth. Suggestion: Use present perfect for changes over time ('have grown older'), plural 'parks' for general activities, and a natural verb phrase ('refreshes my mind').

× Yes, I would love to explore different parks in our city because I wanted to.

✓ Yes, I would love to explore different parks in our city because I have wanted to.

The clause giving the reason should match the modal 'would' and refer to a continuing desire. 'Wanted to' is simple past and suggests the desire is only in the past. Use present perfect 'have wanted to' to show the desire started earlier and continues to now, or use 'want to' to express current desire. Suggestion: Use 'have wanted to' to indicate an ongoing desire, or simply 'want to' for a current desire.

× Oh, I don't have any perks. I want to go in the future.

✓ Oh, I don't have any particular parks in mind. I want to go in the future.

The word 'perks' is incorrect in this context; likely intended 'parks'. Also 'any parks' or 'any particular parks in mind' is clearer. Keep tense consistent: 'I want to go in the future' is acceptable as a future intention. Suggestion: Use the correct noun 'parks' and a clearer phrase 'any particular parks in mind' when expressing not having specific places.