Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer more direct and fluent. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes/No and reason), keep sentences short (max 5), use correct tense and articles, and add one specific detail with a linking word. Avoid redundancy and correct word order (e.g., "went to a park for a walk" and "did some exercise").

例: Yes. I loved going to parks as a child because I often woke up early to go for a walk and do simple exercises. For example, I used to jog around the pond and do stretching, which helped me feel refreshed and concentrate better on my studies.

提案: Answer directly and improve grammar and word choice. Use linking words to connect points (for example, "because" and "also"). Correct phrases: "go to parks," "stay healthy and fit," and "helps me meditate." Add a brief specific example of what you do in parks now.

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they help me stay healthy and fit. For example, I walk for 30 minutes and do breathing exercises there, and this also helps me meditate and reduce stress.

提案: Be concise and respond directly to the question. Use linking words (however, but) if contrasting ideas. Correct phrasing: "There are many parks, but the most popular is..." Mention whether you would like more parks and give one specific reason or example.

例: There are already many parks in my city, but I would like to see more small parks in residential areas. For example, a neighborhood park near my home would make it easier for elderly people to exercise daily.

提案: Improve clarity and sentence structure. Start with a clear statement saying which park you want to visit and why. Correct distance phrasing ("about 100 kilometres away") and avoid filler words. Add one specific detail about the facilities and use a linking word to explain your reason.

例: Yes. I would like to visit Nandali Park, which is about 100 kilometres from my house, because it is unique and has many facilities. For instance, it has well-maintained walking trails and a botanical garden, so I can enjoy both exercise and sightseeing.

× As well as I remember that when I was a child and I woke up early in the morning and went to a park for walk and some do some exercise because it helped me to concentrate in my studies.

✓ As far as I remember, when I was a child I would wake up early in the morning and go to a park for a walk and to do some exercise because it helped me to concentrate on my studies.

The sentence has tense and phrasing problems: 'As well as I remember' is incorrect; use 'As far as I remember'. The sequence of actions describing habitual childhood activities is best expressed with 'would wake up' or 'used to wake up' plus base verbs: 'go to a park for a walk and to do some exercise'. Also use 'concentrate on' rather than 'concentrate in'. Suggestion: use 'As far as I remember, when I was a child I would wake up early and go to the park for a walk and to do some exercise because it helped me to concentrate on my studies.'

× Yes, I prefer to go in park nowadays because it is helpful for to stay healthy and stay fit mentally and physically. It also helps to meditation.

✓ Yes, I prefer to go to the park nowadays because it is helpful for staying healthy and staying fit mentally and physically. It also helps with meditation.

Errors: wrong preposition 'in park' should be 'to the park' and 'for to stay' is incorrect; use 'for staying' or 'to stay'. 'Helps to meditation' is ungrammatical; use 'helps with meditation' or 'helps me meditate'. Also article 'the' is needed before 'park' when referring to a specific or habitual place. Suggestion: 'I prefer to go to the park nowadays because it helps me stay healthy and fit, both mentally and physically. It also helps with meditation.'

× Mostly there are many parks in my city but most popular park is Rajiv Gandhi Park which is very close to my house and every day I go for a walk in the early morning and it helps me to stay mentally and physically.

✓ There are many parks in my city, but the most popular park is Rajiv Gandhi Park, which is very close to my house, and every day I go for a walk early in the morning and it helps me stay mentally and physically fit.

Errors: unnecessary 'Mostly' and missing article before 'most popular park' — use 'the most popular park'. Run-on sentence needs commas and clearer structure. 'For a walk in the early morning' can be simplified to 'for a walk early in the morning'. Add 'fit' after 'mentally and physically' for completeness. Suggestion: split into shorter sentences or add commas to improve clarity.

× If they I will get it sounds to go in future in on pal, I will go to the Nandali park which is around 100 kilometer away from my house. The park is very unique and the there are many facilities available so.

✓ If I get the chance to go in the future, I will go to Nandali Park, which is about 100 kilometres away from my house. The park is very unique and there are many facilities available.

This sentence contains several structure and word choice errors: 'If they I will get it sounds to go in future in on pal' is unintelligible; the intended meaning is conditional 'If I get the chance to go in the future'. Use 'Nandali Park' without 'the' if it's a proper name, or 'the Nandali Park' if local usage requires it. Use 'about 100 kilometres' (plural and 'about' sound natural). Remove extraneous words 'so' and duplicate 'the'. Suggestion: 'If I get the chance to go in the future, I will visit Nandali Park, which is about 100 kilometres from my house. The park is unique and has many facilities.'