Parks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Focus on answering directly with a clear topic sentence, correct tense, and concise structure. Use past tense consistently, avoid filler words, and give one or two specific details (what you did, who you went with). Keep it to no more than 3–4 sentences and use linking words such as “because” or “and” appropriately.

例: Yes. I loved going to parks as a child because my parents often took me to a nearby Navy Park on weekends. There were two large playgrounds where I played on swings and slides with my cousins, so weekends were always fun and busy.

提案: Give a direct topic sentence in present tense, then add a brief specific reason and an example. Use linking words (however, but, so) correctly and avoid fragmented sentences. Mention frequency (e.g. weekends) and the effect (e.g. reminds me of childhood).

例: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks, but I rarely go during the week because of my busy schedule. However, I try to visit on weekends, since walking there reminds me of my childhood and helps me relax.

提案: Answer directly and avoid unclear vocabulary or invented words. State a clear opinion, then give specific reasons and examples (e.g. benefits: exercise, family space, different kinds of parks). Use simple, correct sentences and linking words like “because” or “for example.”

例: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they provide safe places for families and children to play. For example, larger parks could include sports fields for teenagers, while smaller playgrounds would be good for younger children.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence about whether you want to visit them, then give specific reasons (e.g. design, cost) and a short consequence or plan. Use correct grammar for costs and time references, and keep it concise (2–3 sentences).

例: Yes, there are two or three nearby parks I would like to visit because they are well designed and interesting. However, they charge high entrance fees right now, so I am saving money and plan to go when I can afford the tickets.

× Hey, yesterday when I was a child, I usually like to walk and go to the park and there is a Navy park or home and I remember I was both there on the weekends and because and weekends I have a more time to explore it and there are two worthy playgrounds and.

✓ When I was a child I usually liked to walk and go to the park. There was a nearby park I remember. I used to go there on weekends because I had more time to explore. There were two good playgrounds.

The student mixes past and present tenses and uses incorrect temporal adverbs (yesterday when I was a child). Use the simple past or 'used to' for habitual past actions (liked, used to go, had). Also replace 'there is' with 'there was' for past context. Remove redundant words and fix word order for clarity.

× Yes, still like to go to the park but due to the busy schedule I have no time to go in there on a daily basis routine. But still on my weekends I can go there and explore it. That can Remember Me, my childhood memories and.

✓ Yes, I still like to go to the park, but because of my busy schedule I do not have time to go there daily. On weekends I can go and explore it, which reminds me of my childhood memories.

Use present simple for general present habits (I still like, I do not have). Use 'because of' for reason, not 'due to' followed by a noun phrase is acceptable but restructure for clarity. 'Go in there' is incorrect; use 'go there'. Use 'reminds me of' to express that something brings back memories.

× Yes I am explorer person so I really want to see the more boxer in my city and there are many parks in my city as as some of them are big and some of them are for raksha children's and other one for the younger ones. The mostly are for the children's way the children can go and play.

✓ Yes, I am an exploratory person, so I really want to see more parks in my city. There are many parks: some are large, some are for older children and others for younger ones. Most are designed for children so they can go and play.

Articles and adjective forms were incorrect ('an exploratory person' rather than 'explorer person'), 'more parks' not 'the more boxer'. Use 'large' instead of 'big' optionally and correct plural forms. 'Mostly are for the children's way' is ungrammatical; use 'Most are designed for children' and correct possessive/plural usage.

× Are there any parks you want to go to in the future? Student: Yes, there are two, three parks nearby to my home, but there ticket fees are more and more that I cannot afford at that time because some financial issue but they are designed in a good way.

✓ Yes, there are two or three parks near my home, but their ticket fees are so high that I cannot afford them at the moment because of financial issues. However, they are well designed.

Use 'two or three' instead of 'two, three'. Use 'near my home' not 'nearby to'. Correct possessive pronoun 'their' for 'ticket fees'. Use 'so high that' for result clauses. Use plural 'issues' and 'at the moment' for present reference. 'Designed in a good way' becomes 'well designed' for natural phrasing.