Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make the answer more concise and natural by avoiding redundancy (e.g., "like" + "for example") and expanding slightly with a specific reason or brief example. Use one clear topic sentence then one supporting detail with a linking phrase.

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views such as mountains, beaches and sunsets because they capture changing light and moods. For instance, I once took photos at sunrise on a beach and the colors were incredibly dramatic.

提案: Good structure and relevant reasons. Improve by using more natural phrasing (e.g., “unlimited access” is slightly awkward) and include a specific example or short comparison to strengthen the point. Keep it within 3–4 sentences and use linking words smoothly.

例: Although I lived in an urban area while at college, I prefer rural views because they offer more open, breathtaking scenery. For example, the rolling hills and quiet lakes are far more peaceful than city streets, so I can relax and take better photos.

提案: Clear and balanced answer with a good example. To improve, tighten phrasing (avoid filler like “well”) and link the two parts more smoothly with a linking phrase to show contrast. Add one concise specific detail about a foreign landscape for balance.

例: I prefer views in my own country because they are familiar and easy to access; for instance, I know the best nearby beaches for relaxing. However, I also enjoy foreign landscapes when I travel, such as the dramatic fjords I saw in Norway, because they offer a different and exciting perspective.

× Yes, I like taking pictures of different views like for example mountains, beaches or the sunset. Nature is so fascinating and amazing.

✓ Yes, I like taking pictures of different views, for example mountains, beaches, or sunsets. Nature is so fascinating and amazing.

The original sentence contains a redundant phrase 'like for example' and mixed singular/plural in 'the sunset' when listing general types of views. This is a style/grammar issue related to the use of -ing noun phrase and list consistency. Remove redundant words and make items parallel and plural when speaking generally: use 'for example' (not 'like for example') and 'sunsets' (general plural). Also add commas to separate list items for clarity.

× Despite living in an urban area when I was studying for college, I prefer the rural areas because there is an unlimited access to breathtaking sceneries.

✓ Despite living in an urban area when I was studying for college, I prefer rural areas because there is unlimited access to breathtaking scenery.

The phrase 'there is an unlimited access' mixes singular 'is' with countable 'access' and uses the uncountable noun 'scenery' incorrectly as plural. Correct usage: 'there is unlimited access' (no article) and 'scenery' is uncountable, not 'sceneries'. Also 'the rural areas' is fine, but 'prefer rural areas' is more natural here.

× Furthermore, you are also away from the noise, the traffic and the busy streets in the urban areas.

✓ Furthermore, you are also away from noise, traffic, and busy streets in urban areas.

Definite articles ('the') are unnecessary when speaking generally about noise, traffic, and busy streets. Remove 'the' and 'the urban areas' to make the sentence general: 'in urban areas.' Parallel list punctuation improved with commas.

× Well, I prefer views in my own country because they feel familiar and easier to reach.

✓ Well, I prefer views in my own country because they feel familiar and are easier to reach.

The original uses 'feel familiar and easier to reach' which omits the verb for the second adjective, creating a parallelism issue. Insert 'are' before 'easier' to maintain correct parallel verb structure with 'feel.' This keeps tense and meaning consistent.

× For example, I often visit the nearby beaches and I know the best spots for spending quality time.

✓ For example, I often visit nearby beaches and I know the best spots for spending quality time.

The phrase 'the nearby beaches' is acceptable, but when speaking generally it's more natural to say 'nearby beaches.' This is a minor article/usage adjustment; present tense 'visit' and 'know' are correct and kept. Removed unnecessary 'the' for natural generalization.

× But sometimes I also like foreign landscapes when I travel because they are unique and interesting.

✓ But sometimes I also like foreign landscapes when I travel because they are unique and interesting.

This sentence is grammatically correct. It uses present simple appropriately to express general preference. No correction needed.