Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Reduce hesitations and finish sentences clearly. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Use accurate grammar (e.g., plural/singular agreement) and avoid filler sounds like “uh”.

例: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. For example, when I go hiking I often take photos of mountain ridges and waterfalls because their colors and textures are striking. Also, I sometimes take portraits of myself against those backdrops, which makes me happy and helps me remember the trip.

提案: Use a clear topic sentence and link supporting details with words like “because” or “for example.” Correct verb forms and plural nouns, and complete your last thought. Keep responses concise (max 5 sentences).

例: I prefer rural views to urban ones because I find nature more relaxing. For example, I enjoy photographing mountains, rivers and sunsets since they offer peaceful scenes and vivid colors. Also, I often unwind there after a busy week, which helps me recharge.

提案: Be more organized: give a clear answer, then justify it with specific reasons or examples. Avoid repetition and fillers, and correct geographic phrasing. Aim for two to three concise sentences with one specific example.

例: I prefer views in my own country because Iran has a wide range of landscapes. For instance, the lush forests in the north and the warm coastal scenery in the south provide very different and memorable photo opportunities.

× I see beautiful scenery and breathtaking view.

✓ I see beautiful scenery and breathtaking views.

The word 'view' should be plural to match 'scenery' and to sound natural when referring to multiple sights; use the plural 'views'. Use 'breathtaking views' or 'a breathtaking view' if singular.

× I tend to uh, take uh, some photo from nature and also uh, myself, uh, it's uh, make me happy when I.

✓ I tend to take some photos of nature and of myself; it makes me happy.

Use plural 'photos' for countable nouns and the preposition 'of' for source/subject. 'It's make' is incorrect; the correct verb is 'it makes' (third person singular). Also remove incomplete fragment 'when I.'

× Actually I prefer go going to rural area, it makes me delighted and I'm interested in taking photo from mountain, rivers or sunset.

✓ Actually I prefer going to rural areas; it makes me delighted, and I'm interested in taking photos of mountains, rivers, or sunsets.

Use the gerund 'going' after 'prefer'. 'Rural area' should be plural 'rural areas' for general preference. Use plural 'photos' and plural nouns 'mountains, rivers, sunsets'. Use preposition 'of' not 'from'. Also join clauses correctly with punctuation.

× Also sometimes I unwind in.

✓ Also sometimes I unwind there.

The original ends with a preposition 'in' but lacks an object; use 'there' to indicate the place previously mentioned (rural areas) or restate the place: 'I unwind in rural areas.'

× Umm, Iran, uh, has a lot of uh, beautiful, uh, breathtaking views, uh, especially in north-south, Iran and South.

✓ Umm, Iran has a lot of beautiful, breathtaking views, especially in the north and the south of the country.

Remove unnecessary pauses and commas. Use article 'the' with 'north and the south' and clarify 'of the country' for natural phrasing. Avoid repeating 'Iran' unnecessarily.

× So, umm, if I uh, want choose, I prefer umm, my country because we find.

✓ So, if I had to choose, I would prefer my country because we have many beautiful places.

'Want choose' is incorrect; use 'had to choose' or 'want to choose'. To express preference in hypothetical choice, use conditional 'would prefer'. 'We find' is incomplete and unnatural; replace with 'we have many beautiful places.'