Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 文をより自然で簡潔にするため、冗長な表現を避け、語順や前置詞を正しく使いましょう。具体的には“while I sit by the window”や“scenery of the nature under eye”は不自然なので、“because I can enjoy the scenery”や“watch the passing landscape”などシンプルで自然な表現に直すと良いです。また、接続詞（for example, because, so）や短い補足情報を使って一文内で明確に理由を述べる練習をしてください。

例: Yes, I prefer to sit by the window because I enjoy watching the passing landscape. For example, I like seeing mountains and rivers as we travel, which makes the journey more relaxing.

提案: 文法と語形を正しく使い、情報を組み合わせて一貫した答えにしましょう。過去形や進行形の一致（例：“my father drove the whole time”）や時制（“it took about twenty hours”）に注意してください。また、場所名や移動手段の詳細を加えると具体性が増します。接続詞（for example, because, and）を使って文を繋げ、全体で3文以内に収めることを意識しましょう。

例: Yes, I did. When I was a child my family drove from Skuka to Tama, which took about twenty hours. My father drove the whole way, so we spent a lot of time playing games and listening to music to pass the time.

× Yes, I prefer to sit by the window when travelling because while I sit by the window I can enjoy watching the scenery of the nature under eye.

✓ Yes, I prefer to sit by the window when travelling because when I sit there I can enjoy watching the natural scenery around me.

The sentence has awkward and incorrect phrasing: 'while I sit by the window' is repetitive and can be simplified to 'when I sit there'; 'the scenery of the nature' is ungrammatical—use 'natural scenery' or 'the scenery' and not both; 'under eye' is incorrect and unclear—use 'around me' to indicate what can be seen. Also improve flow by avoiding repetition of 'by the window'. Suggestion: Use concise, natural collocations (e.g., 'natural scenery', 'around me') and avoid repeating the same phrase twice.

× Yes, I had a long journey with my family as a child. It was from Skuka to Tama. My father drive all time and it would take about twenty hours.

✓ Yes, I had a long journey with my family as a child. It was from Skuka to Tama. My father drove the whole time and it took about twenty hours.

There are two verb tense/agreement issues. 'My father drive all time' is incorrect because the past-tense subject 'father' requires the past form 'drove' (third-person singular in past uses irregular form). Use 'the whole time' rather than 'all time'. 'It would take about twenty hours' should be simple past 'it took about twenty hours' to match the past narrative. Suggestion: Keep past-tense verbs consistent when describing past events and use correct irregular past forms (drive → drove).