Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答要更自然且更简洁，注意用词和语法准确。第一句可直接表明观点并用一两句具体理由支持；避免重复和口头填充词（如 "umm"）。注意动词时态和名词用法（例如不要说 "take out my" 未指明物品），并控制在不超过五句内。可以用连接词（because, so, for example）来使句子更连贯。

例: Yes, I always look out the window when travelling by bus or car because I enjoy seeing local life and architecture. For example, I often spot interesting shops or parks that I plan to visit later. I also sometimes take photos with my phone to remember the views.

提案: 回答要更准确、语法更规范并避免重复。不要重复强调“always”两次；注意冠词和名词复数（例如 "some beautiful moments"），动词形式（"it make"→"it makes"）。尽量给出具体细节，比如拍什么类型的景色，用什么方法保存照片，并把句子控制在三到四句内。

例: Yes, I often take photos when I'm the passenger, especially of interesting buildings or landscapes. I usually use my phone to capture colourful scenes or unique details. These pictures help me remember my trips and plan places to visit later.

提案: 回答要更清晰、语法正确并提供具体对比。先给出总体立场（例如没有强烈偏好），然后用两到三个清晰、具体的理由分别描述山和海的优点。注意单复数和词汇选择（"mountain"→"mountains", "it have"→"they have", 用正确词汇替换错误的词如 "waste" 应为 "waves"）。避免模糊表达如 "some are coming atmosphere"。

例: I don't have a strong preference, because both have their advantages. Mountains offer fresh air, greenery and peaceful hiking trails, which are great for relaxing. The sea is relaxing too, with the sound of the waves and wide open views that help me unwind.

× Yes, I always do that 'cause it is pressure time for me to take in the scenery and learn about the local culture and I often spot interesting places I want to visit later.

✓ Yes, I always do that because it's a precious time for me to take in the scenery and learn about the local culture, and I often spot interesting places I want to visit later.

句子结构混乱，使用了不合适的词汇（pressure → precious）且未正确连词分隔从句。建议：使用恰当词汇并用逗号或连词分隔并列部分，使句子更清晰。

× And sometime I will also take out my and take a photo of the beautiful scenery I have obsessed and I think it is a good way to umm.

✓ Sometimes I will also take out my phone and take a photo of the beautiful scenery I'm obsessed with, and I think it is a good way to...

原句缺少名词（my → my phone）且短语顺序错误（obsessed 应与介词 with 连用）。建议：补全名词，使用固定搭配 'be obsessed with'，并将句子分段或用逗号连接以避免冗长。

× Yes, I always do that when I'm the passenger. I always take out my phone to capture the some beautiful or interesting moment outside the car window and it make me feel like I am making record of every pressure moment I have met and I can look after to this picture after I finish my trip.

✓ Yes, I always do that when I'm the passenger. I always take out my phone to capture some beautiful or interesting moments outside the car window, and it makes me feel like I am recording every precious moment I experienced; I can look back at these pictures after I finish my trip.

存在名词单复数和动词形式错误：'the some' 多余定冠词，moment 应为复数 moments；'make' 应与单数主语 it 一致用 makes；'making record' 表达不自然，应为 'recording' 或 'make a record'；'pressure' 用词错误，应为 'precious'；'have met' 用法不当，描述过去经历用 'experienced' 更合适；'look after to' 不正确，应为 'look back at'。建议：注意定冠词与不定冠词的使用，主谓一致，以及常用固定搭配（recording, look back at）。

× I always take out my phone to capture the some beautiful or interesting moment outside the car window

✓ I always take out my phone to capture some beautiful or interesting moments outside the car window.

错误使用冠词'the'与限定词'some'同时搭配（'the some' 不存在），并且 'moment' 与 'some' 搭配时应使用复数。建议：使用 'some' + 可数名词复数，或用 'the' + 单数/特指名词。

× and it make me feel like I am making record of every pressure moment I have met and I can look after to this picture after I finish my trip.

✓ and it makes me feel like I am recording every precious moment I experienced, and I can look back at these pictures after I finish my trip.

主谓不一致：主语 'it'（单数）后动词应为 'makes' 而非 'make'。另外多处搭配错误（making record → recording; pressure → precious; have met → experienced; look after to → look back at）。建议：检查主语单复数并确保动词形式一致，使用常见搭配。

× I always take out my phone to capture the some beautiful or interesting moment outside the car window and it make me feel like I am making record of every pressure moment I have met and I can look after to this picture after I finish my trip.

✓ I always take out my phone to capture some beautiful or interesting moments outside the car window, and it makes me feel like I am recording every precious moment I experienced; I can look back at these pictures after I finish my trip.

原句在多个地方出现单数/复数问题：'some' 应搭配复数 'moments'；'picture' 与前文复数 'these pictures' 不一致。建议：保持数量一致，复数情景使用复数名词。

× And sometime I will also take out my and take a photo of the beautiful scenery I have obsessed and I think it is a good way to umm.

✓ Sometimes I will also take out my phone and take a photo of the beautiful scenery I'm obsessed with, and I think it is a good way to...

原句 'take out my' 后缺少名词，代词使用不完整；'I have obsessed' 中缺少介词 with，应为 'be obsessed with'。建议：注意代词后需跟名词或名词短语，使用完整的短语结构。

× Their mountain is good, it have a lot of greenery and it provide fresh air and some are coming atmosphere while the sea is also good because the way the sounds of the waste is coming and make me feel relaxed.

✓ The mountains are nice; they have a lot of greenery and provide fresh air and a calming atmosphere, while the sea is also good because the sound of the waves is soothing and makes me feel relaxed.

原句形容词/副词及表达不当：'Their mountain' 用词错误，应为 'The mountains' 或 'The mountain'；'it have' 与 'it provide' 主谓不一致；'some are coming atmosphere' 不通顺，应为 'a calming atmosphere'；'the sounds of the waste' 拼写和用词错误（waste → waves）；'is coming' 不合适，描述声音应用 'is' 或 'are' 与动词 'soothing' 搭配；'make' 应改 'makes' 与主语 'the sound' 一致。建议：注意主谓一致、正确词汇（waves）、常用搭配（calming atmosphere, soothing sound）。

× Their mountain is good, it have a lot of greenery and it provide fresh air and some are coming atmosphere while the sea is also good because the way the sounds of the waste is coming and make me feel relaxed.

✓ The mountains are nice; they have a lot of greenery and provide fresh air and a calming atmosphere, while the sea is also good because the sound of the waves is soothing and makes me feel relaxed.

句子中多处主谓不一致：'Their mountain is' 用法和指代错误，'it have' 与 'it provide' 应与复数主语或改为单数一致；'the sounds ... is' 也存在数不一致。建议：确定主语单复数后调整动词形式，并检查指代词（their → the）。

× Their mountain is good, it have a lot of greenery and it provide fresh air and some are coming atmosphere while the sea is also good because the way the sounds of the waste is coming and make me feel relaxed.

✓ The mountains are nice; they have a lot of greenery and provide fresh air and a calming atmosphere, while the sea is also good because the sound of the waves is soothing and makes me feel relaxed.

'Their' 用法不当，应该用定冠词或直接复数名词 'The mountains'，此外代词 'they' 更合适指代复数主语。建议：使用正确的代词或名词形式确保指代清晰。