Travelling— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Ответ должен быть более естественным, грамматически корректным и кратким. Начните с чётного утверждения, затем добавьте 1–2 конкретных детали (кто, как часто, зачем). Уберите повторы и заполнители («uh», «I, I»). Используйте связанные слова (for example, because, so) для логической связности. Пример ошибок: неправильные времена, порядок слов и лишние слова. Попробуйте сказать это в 2–3 предложениях, не более пяти.

例: Yes, I usually look out of the window when I travel by bus. For example, my husband and I go to the mountains almost every month to relax, so I enjoy watching the changing landscape and nature during the trip.

提案: Ответ должен быть более конкретным и грамматически правильным. Сначала прямо ответьте «yes/no», затем объясните привычку и когда вы это делаете. Избегайте общих фраз («everyone») и некорректных конструкций («me like uh, them»). Используйте связки (because, when, if) и конкретные детали (how often, for what purpose).

例: Yes, I often take photos of the scenery outside the car window, especially when the view is beautiful. I usually post the best pictures on Instagram because I like sharing landscapes with my friends.

提案: Начните с чётого предпочтения («I prefer…») и далее объясните 1–2 причины с конкретикой (например «fresh air», «hiking», «relaxing on the beach»). Используйте связки (because, although, however) для сравнения и сократите заполнители. Можно упомянуть, что вы иногда выбираете другой вариант для разнообразия.

例: I prefer the mountains because I enjoy fresh air and hiking in beautiful natural surroundings. However, I also like the sea for relaxing on the beach sometimes, so I choose according to my mood.

× Actually, I loved traveling by bus.

✓ Actually, I love traveling by bus.

The student uses past tense 'loved' while speaking about a habitual preference. Use present simple 'love' for general habits or preferences. Suggestion: use present simple when describing routines or likes (I love, I usually, I often).

× For example, there are we, uh, almost every month with my husband, I, I go to, uh, travel a mountain in order to have a rest.

✓ For example, almost every month my husband and I go to the mountains to rest.

The original sentence has incorrect word order and unnecessary filler words making it ungrammatical. Rearranged subject 'my husband and I', verb 'go', object 'to the mountains' and purpose 'to rest'. Suggestion: keep subject and verb together and place time expressions (almost every month) at the beginning or end. Remove redundant fillers.

× Of course, I love nature and watch.

✓ Of course, I love nature and watching it.

The verb 'watch' needs a gerund or an object here. 'Watching it' or 'looking at it' fits better. Suggestion: use 'watching' (verb + -ing) when following 'love' to indicate enjoying an activity.

× Uh, actually, uh, everyone, uh, take photo and took it for Instagram and like them.

✓ Uh, actually, everyone takes photos and posts them on Instagram and likes them.

Subject 'everyone' is singular and requires third person singular verb 'takes'. Also maintain consistent tense: present simple for habitual actions. Use plural 'photos' and correct verbs 'posts' or 'posts them' instead of 'took' which is past. Suggestion: ensure verb agrees with singular indefinite pronouns and keep tense consistent.

× Of course me like uh, them and I will every time take a picture when it will be very beautiful and nice.

✓ Of course I like them, and I always take a picture when the view is very beautiful.

Pronoun 'me' incorrectly used instead of subject 'I'. 'Every time' better as 'always'. Future 'will be' is unnecessary; present simple 'is' describes general condition. Suggestion: use subject pronouns and present simple for habitual conditions.

× I love it and what want to follow scenery outside of.

✓ I love it and want to follow the scenery outside.

The sentence contains extra 'what' and incorrect preposition 'of'. Remove 'what' and use 'the scenery outside' with no trailing preposition. Suggestion: keep clause concise: 'I want to follow the scenery outside.'

× Uh, if you ask me, there are between mountains and sea, there are many, umm, uh, many differences.

✓ Uh, if you ask me, there are many differences between the mountains and the sea.

Incorrect placement of 'between' and duplicated 'there are'. Correct order: 'there are many differences between A and B'. Suggestion: place 'between' before the two nouns it connects and avoid repeating 'there are'.

× Uh, every time I want to go mountains because there are fresh air and beautiful nature and of course a sea also, uh, nice place to travel.

✓ I always want to go to the mountains because the air is fresh and the nature is beautiful; of course the sea is also a nice place to travel.

Missing preposition 'to' before 'the mountains' and incorrect articles: 'fresh air' often uses 'the air is fresh' in this context; 'nature' needs 'the' when referring to environment; 'a sea' incorrect—use 'the sea' or 'the sea is also a nice place'. Also 'every time' replaced by 'I always' for natural phrasing. Suggestion: include necessary prepositions and articles and use present simple to describe general truths.