Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 質問にはまず「There aren’t many tall buildings near my home.」のように直接答えましょう。「the big city it named Tokyo」は不自然なので、「Tokyo is nearby」などと表現できます。また、「as and」は不要です。自宅周辺の特徴を、ショッピングモールや低い建物など具体的に説明すると、内容がより明確になります。

例: There aren’t many tall buildings near my home because I live in a quiet residential area. There is a large shopping mall nearby, but most of the other buildings are fairly low.

提案: 「usually」の繰り返しを避け、「especially」や「when I visit Tokyo」を使うと自然です。「Tokyo Sky three」は固有名詞の「Tokyo Skytree」に直しましょう。写真を撮る理由や、どのような建物が好きかを1文加えると、回答に具体性が出ます。

例: Yes, I do, especially when I visit Tokyo. I enjoy photographing famous landmarks such as Tokyo Skytree and Tokyo Tower because their designs and views are impressive.

提案: 「And yes, there is」ではなく、「Yes, I’d like to visit Tokyo Skytree.」と直接答えましょう。「visit at」は誤りで、「visit Tokyo Skytree」と言います。また、「the site from this building」は不自然なので、「the view from the top of the building」と表現してください。訪れたい理由を、展望台からの景色など具体的に説明するとよいでしょう。

例: Yes, I’d like to visit Tokyo Skytree. I’ve heard that the view from the observation deck is spectacular, especially at sunset.

提案: 「a little fear」は「a little afraid」または「slightly nervous」とするのが自然です。「torpedo」と「tor building」は文脈に合わないため、おそらく「top floors」や「tall buildings」を使うとよいでしょう。最初に「No, I wouldn’t」と答え、その後に高所への不安と、家に住みたい理由を簡潔に説明してください。

例: No, I wouldn’t want to live in a tall building. I feel slightly nervous on the upper floors, so I’d prefer to live in a house with a small garden.

× And my home is located in the city near the big city it named Tokyo.

✓ My home is located in a city near the big city called Tokyo.

The phrase it named Tokyo uses an incorrect active structure. Use the past participle called to describe a city that has been given a name. Also, a city is more appropriate than the city when it is mentioned for the first time.

× So there are not any buildings near my house as and there is a shopping mall instead of the building.

✓ So there are no buildings near my house, and there is a shopping mall instead.

As and cannot be used together in this sentence. Use and to connect the two independent clauses. Instead is sufficient at the end because the meaning is already clear.

× I'd like to visit at the Toyota Sky three and the site from this building is very beautiful.

✓ I'd like to visit the Toyota Sky three, and the view from this building is very beautiful.

The verb visit is followed directly by a place, so at is not used: visit the building. The preposition from is correct with view when describing what can be seen from a building. View is also the appropriate word for scenery, whereas site refers to a location.

× No, I want to live in a house because I feel a little fear when I go to the torpedo so I don't want to live in the tor building.

✓ No, I want to live in a house because I feel a little afraid when I go to the torpedo, so I don't want to live in the tor building.

After feel, use the adjective afraid to describe the speaker's emotional state. Fear is generally used as a noun, so feel a little fear is unnatural in this context.

× No, I want to live in a house because I feel a little fear when I go to the torpedo so I don't want to live in the tor building.

✓ No, I want to live in a house because I feel a little afraid when I go to the torpedo. Therefore, I don't want to live in the tor building.

Because and so should not normally be used together to connect the same cause-and-result relationship. Use because with the reason and therefore or so in a separate structure. Also, a comma is needed before so when it connects two independent clauses.