Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer more concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, use linking words and one specific detail. For example, say you don’t have tall buildings nearby, then add where they are and a brief comparison.

例: No, there aren’t any tall buildings near my home. I live in a residential neighborhood with mostly single‑storey houses, but when I go to central Cebu City I see many high‑rises that are much taller than my house.

提案: Open with a clear direct sentence, then give two specific reasons using linking words (for example, because/so). Replace vague words with precise vocabulary like “architecture” or “façade” and keep it within 3–4 sentences.

例: I only photograph buildings when they catch my eye. For example, I take photos if a building has striking architecture or an interesting façade, because those details make good memories. If a building is ordinary, I usually don’t bother.

提案: Begin with a direct statement naming the building, then give 1–2 specific reasons why you want to visit, using linking words like because or because of. Avoid repeating phrases such as “hopefully” and redundant mentions of seeing it in person.

例: I would love to visit the Eiffel Tower in Paris. I want to see it because its iron lattice structure is famous worldwide, and experiencing its height and the city views from the top would be unforgettable.

提案: Give a clear opening statement and then explain with a short comparison between stages of life. Remove hesitations and repeated fragments; use linking words such as however and because to make reasons clear.

例: It depends on my stage of life. Right now I prefer living at home because I’m a student and want to save money, but in my twenties I would prefer to live in an apartment in a tall building for more independence and convenience.

× 'Not really what I'm surrounded with near my home I just houses and not the tall buildings.'

✓ 'Not really. Around my home I just have houses and not tall buildings.'

'Singular and plural issue: "I just houses" is ungrammatical because the verb is missing and nouns need correct agreement. Also word order and missing verb cause confusion. Correction adds the verb "have" and removes the article "the" before "tall buildings" to match general plural. Suggestion: use a verb (have) after the subject and keep plural nouns without unnecessary articles when speaking generally.'

× 'If I go to the city like in the middle of the Cebu city then yes there are tall buildings that that are way bigger than my house.'

✓ 'If I go to Cebu City, then yes, there are tall buildings that are much bigger than my house.'

'Subject-verb agreement / sentence clarity: Repetition "that that" is an error and "in the middle of the Cebu city" is awkward. Also "way bigger" is colloquial; "much bigger" is more appropriate. Correction fixes redundancy, capitalizes proper noun, and improves clarity. Suggestion: avoid repeating words, use proper nouns without extra prepositions, and choose clearer comparative adverbs.'

× 'Only if I find it fascinating to take pictures of for memories.'

✓ 'Only if I find a building fascinating do I take pictures for memories.'

'Sentence structure error: The original is sentence fragment lacking a clear main verb for the subject. Rearranged to include subject and verb and clarify what is being photographed. Suggestion: ensure each sentence has a subject and a main verb and place adverbial phrases where they modify clearly.'

× 'If I find it good and the architectural is also great and more structured, then yes I take pictures of it.'

✓ 'If I find it attractive and the architecture is well designed and interesting, then yes, I take pictures of it.'

'Incorrect use of adjectives or nouns: "find it good" is vague, and "the architectural is" incorrectly uses an adjective as a noun. "More structured" is awkward. Correction replaces with appropriate adjectives/nouns: "attractive" and "architecture is well designed." Suggestion: use the noun "architecture" and choose precise adjectives.'

× 'But if it's just a normal building then I don't.'

✓ 'But if it's just a normal building, then I don't take pictures.'

'Present tense / sentence completeness: "I don't" is a shortened negative that expects a verb; completing the thought with "take pictures" clarifies the action. Suggestion: avoid leaving verb phrases unfinished in responses.'

× 'Hopefully one day I could go to France and visit the Eiffel Tower.'

✓ 'Hopefully one day I can go to France and visit the Eiffel Tower.'

'Present tense/modal mix: Using "could" implies conditional or uncertain past ability; "can" or "will be able to" fits a hopeful future plan. Correction uses "can" to express realistic hope. Suggestion: use "can" or "will" for future intentions; use "could" for hypothetical or polite requests.'

× 'That would be awesome to see it in person and not just in pictures or in the Internet, but actually see it and witness it with my own eyes as it is very tall in person.'

✓ 'It would be awesome to see it in person and not just in pictures or on the Internet, to actually witness it with my own eyes since it is very tall.'

'Verb + -ing form / preposition: Original repeats "see" and "witness" awkwardly and uses incorrect preposition "in the Internet." Also sentence flow is clumsy. Correction improves parallel structure, replaces "in" with "on" for Internet, and uses "since" for reason. Suggestion: avoid repetitive verbs, use correct prepositions for online content, and make clause relationships clear.'

× 'Hopefully I get to visit one day.'

✓ 'Hopefully I will get to visit one day.'

'Present tense issue: "I get" is present simple and less natural for future hopes. Using "will get" expresses future possibility more clearly. Suggestion: use future auxiliary for hopes about the future.'

× 'It depends on which stage I am my life Right now I'm a student so I would prefer if I live it, if I live in, if I live at home.'

✓ 'It depends on which stage of my life I am at. Right now I'm a student, so I would prefer to live at home.'

'Sentence structure errors: Original has missing prepositions, incorrect word order, and repeated fragments "if I live." Correction adds "of" and "at" for the phrase "stage of my life," removes redundant fragments, and uses the infinitive "to live" plus the correct location "at home." Suggestion: use standard phrase "stage of my life," place prepositions correctly, and avoid repeating alternatives without finishing them.'

× 'But if I'm a young adult, like fully in my 20s, then I'd prefer to live in my own apartment in the building.'

✓ 'But if I'm a young adult, in my twenties, then I'd prefer to live in my own apartment in a building.'

'Present tense / article use: "fully in my 20s" is informal; "in my twenties" is smoother. Also "in the building" implies a specific building previously mentioned; use "in a building" for general preference. Suggestion: choose appropriate articles (a/an/the) based on specificity and use common expressions for age.'