Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and clear: start with a concise topic sentence saying whether there are tall buildings, then give one or two specific supporting details (names, functions, appearance). Avoid filler words (uh) and unclear phrases. Use correct collocations (e.g., "tall apartment and office towers", "modern architecture"). Keep it within 2–4 sentences.

例: Yes, there are several tall buildings near my home. For example, Hyde Rise is a prominent apartment and office tower that dominates the skyline. Most buildings in my area feature modern architecture with glass facades and smart building technology, which gives the neighbourhood a very urban feel.

提案: Begin with a clear statement about whether you take photos and why. Use correct grammar (e.g., "as an architect"). Give one specific reason and a brief contrasting point if needed, using linking words such as "however" or "although". Replace vague words like "beauty" and "Livy" with accurate terms (e.g., "buildings", "city life").

例: Yes, as an architect I often photograph buildings to study their design and proportions. However, I sometimes avoid photographing the busy modern city because the crowds and noise make me feel stressed, so I prefer taking photos of natural scenes instead.

提案: Answer the question directly: name one specific building you want to visit and explain why with concrete reasons. Avoid unclear phrases and incorrect tense. Use linking words like "because" or "for example" and keep the response focused (max 3–4 sentences).

例: Yes, I would like to visit the Shanghai Tower because it is one of the tallest and most modern skyscrapers in Asia. I am interested in its innovative structure and sustainable design, and I would like to study how the architects solved the challenges of building at that scale.

提案: Start with a clear yes/no and then give specific reasons (views, convenience, amenities). Correct vocabulary (e.g., "city view", "high-rise apartment"). If you mention flexibility, make it concise and natural. Avoid redundancies and filler words.

例: Yes, I would like to live in a high-rise apartment because I enjoy the panoramic city views and the convenience of being close to shops and transport. That said, I am flexible and could also be happy living in a quieter neighbourhood if needed.

× Uh yes, most of the beauty near my home are tall Hyde Rise apartment and office tower because I live in a modern urban area.

✓ Uh yes, most of the buildings near my home are tall, like Hyde Rise apartments and office towers, because I live in a modern urban area.

The student used 'beauty' incorrectly instead of 'buildings' (countable plural). Also 'Hyde Rise apartment and office tower' mixes singular and plural; it should be pluralized or rephrased. Use plural nouns to agree with 'most of'. Suggestion: use 'buildings' and plural forms 'apartments' and 'office towers' when referring to multiple structures. Grammar problem type ID:1

× Uh, many of them are built, we advance or quit resisting technology, so they look quite modern and high technology.

✓ Uh, many of them are built with advanced technology, so they look quite modern and high-tech.

The original phrase 'we advance or quit resisting technology' is ungrammatical and likely intended to mean 'with advanced technology'. Also 'high technology' is better expressed as 'high-tech' or 'modern'. Suggestion: use the preposition 'with' and the adjective 'advanced', and use a hyphenated adjective 'high-tech'. Grammar problem type ID:17

× Uh, as a architecture I usually take a photo of beauty to measure how they design for this.

✓ Uh, as an architect I usually take photos of buildings to examine their design.

Errors: 'a architecture' should be 'an architect' (article + noun form), 'a photo of beauty' is incorrect; 'beauty' should be 'buildings' and plural if taking multiple photos, and 'measure how they design for this' is awkward; use 'examine their design'. Suggestion: choose correct article 'an' before vowel sound and use the correct noun form 'architect'. Grammar problem type ID:22

× But on the other hand, I don't really like Livy and the modern city because sometimes it's made me so stressed so I prefer taking some nature.

✓ But on the other hand, I don't really like lively, modern cities because they sometimes make me stressed, so I prefer photographing nature.

Problems: 'Livy' is likely 'lively' or 'living'; 'the modern city' should be plural 'modern cities' when speaking generally. 'It's made me so stressed' mixes tenses and pronouns; use 'they sometimes make me stressed'. 'Taking some nature' is unnatural; use 'photographing nature' or 'being in nature'. Suggestion: use correct adjective 'lively', match subject plurality with verb, and choose appropriate verb for activities with nature. Grammar problem type ID:12

× Yes, uh, I really trying to visit the beauty as much as I can and the future, but I have one painting the side that really tall and is take really time to be there like around 100 year is really tall and modern architecture means with the Asian architect.

✓ Yes, uh, I am really trying to visit beautiful buildings as much as I can in the future, but there is one skyscraper on the riverside that is very tall and takes a long time to build; it is a modern building designed by an Asian architect.

Multiple tense and word-form errors: 'I really trying' should be 'I am really trying' (present continuous). 'the beauty' should be 'beautiful buildings' or 'a beautiful building'. 'the future' needs preposition 'in the future'. 'one painting the side' is unclear; likely 'one skyscraper on the riverside'. 'is take really time to be there like around 100 year' should be 'takes a long time to build, around 100 years'. 'modern architecture means with the Asian architect' should be 'a modern building designed by an Asian architect'. Suggestions: use correct continuous tense 'am trying', use clear nouns, add prepositions like 'in', and use passive/active forms appropriately for 'designed by'. Grammar problem type ID:6

× Yes, uh, I enjoy looking the city view for the height of the city, so if I have a chance, I would like to live in a really high tall pity, but I can live any situation.

✓ Yes, uh, I enjoy looking at the city view from a height, so if I have the chance, I would like to live in a very tall building, but I could adapt to any situation.

Errors: 'looking the city view' requires the preposition 'at' ('looking at the city view'). 'for the height of the city' is awkward; use 'from a height'. 'if I have a chance' should be 'if I have the chance' (article). 'high tall pity' is gibberish; intended 'very tall building'. 'I can live any situation' needs 'adapt to any situation' or 'I can live in any situation'. Suggestions: use correct prepositions, articles, and choose appropriate verbs like 'adapt'. Grammar problem type ID:22}]}