Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question, then add one specific supporting detail. Correct verb forms and articles, avoid repetition.

例: Yes. There are several tall buildings near my home, the most notable being VR Mall. It’s a very tall and modern shopping complex with glass facades, and I often go there because it has many shops and a cinema.

提案: Answer directly, use correct tense and clearer structure. Give one specific situation when you take photos and why. Use linking words (for example, because, when) to make it coherent.

例: Yes, I often take photos of that tall building when I pass by because its architecture looks impressive. For example, I usually photograph the glass facade at sunset because the light creates attractive reflections.

提案: The question asks about a building you'd like to visit (future/wish). Instead of describing routine visits, say a building you want to visit and why. Use a topic sentence and one supporting reason with specifics.

例: Yes, I would like to visit the new observation tower downtown because it offers panoramic views of the city. I’ve heard the top-floor viewing platform has telescopes and a small café, which would make the visit memorable.

提案: Be direct and correct conditional grammar. Start with a clear opinion, then give specific reasons (comfort, view, amenities). Keep it within 3–4 sentences and use linking words like because or so.

例: Yes, I would like to live in a tall building if I had the chance, because it would give me better views and more modern facilities. Also, high-rise apartments often have security and a gym, which would be convenient compared to my current one-story house.

× Yes, in my city as I remember many tall buildings near my home such as VR Mall. It is a very tall building where I live and it is a very beautiful.

✓ Yes, I remember many tall buildings near my home in my city, such as the VR Mall. It is a very tall and very beautiful building where I live.

The original sentence has awkward pronoun and word order use. 'As I remember' is unnatural; 'I remember' is correct. 'Such as VR Mall' needs the definite article 'the' for a specific place. The clause 'It is a very tall building where I live and it is a very beautiful' is ungrammatical and redundant; combine adjectives 'very tall and very beautiful' and place 'where I live' appropriately. Suggestion: simplify clauses, use articles with specific nouns, and keep adjective order concise. Grammar problem type ID:12

× As I said, where I live in my city, we are more is a very tall building. Whenever I passed through this building that time I take photos of this building.

✓ As I said, there is a very tall building where I live in the city. Whenever I pass by that building, I take photos of it.

The original contains multiple structural errors: 'we are more is a very tall building' is ungrammatical; use 'there is' for existence. Tenses were mixed: 'Whenever I passed through' (past) with 'I take' (present); use present simple 'whenever I pass by' to indicate habitual action. Replace the repeated noun with the pronoun 'it'. Suggestion: use 'there is' to state existence, maintain consistent tense for habitual actions, and use pronouns to avoid repetition. Grammar problem type ID:26

× Yeah, so usually I go to this building to such as shopping and visiting many other shops like food and clothing.

✓ Yes, I usually go to this building to shop and to visit many other shops selling food and clothing.

The phrase 'to such as shopping' is incorrect. Use the infinitive 'to shop' for purpose. 'Visiting many other shops like food and clothing' misuses 'like' with categories; use 'selling food and clothing' or 'for food and clothing'. Suggestion: use parallel infinitives for listed purposes and correct prepositions/verbs for intent. Grammar problem type ID:11

× Yeah, so if I got a chance to live in a tall building that time I prefer to live in tall buildings because nowadays I am living in a one story house.

✓ Yes, if I got a chance to live in a tall building, I would prefer to live in one because I am currently living in a one-story house.

The conditional sentence needs correct modal/tense forms. Use 'if I got a chance' with 'would prefer' (second conditional) or better 'if I got a chance... I would prefer'. Also use 'one' to avoid repetition and 'currently' or 'nowadays' with present continuous 'I am living' is acceptable but 'I currently live' is more natural. 'One story' should be hyphenated as 'one-story'. Suggestion: use consistent conditional structure (if + past, would + base verb) and fix article/compound adjective usage. Grammar problem type ID:4}]}