Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise, use correct grammar, and give specific supporting details. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific facts using linking words. Avoid unrelated words and repetition.

例: No, there aren’t any tall buildings near my home because I live in a rural area. For example, most structures here are one- or two-storey houses and a few small shops, so the skyline is mostly low and open.

提案: Answer directly, avoid filler words and inappropriate language, and give specific reasons. Use linking words to connect your reason and an example. Keep it within 2–4 sentences.

例: No, I don’t usually take photos of buildings. Instead, I prefer photographing landscapes and people because those pictures remind me of places and moments, for example, sunsets and family gatherings.

提案: State the building clearly, correct factual errors, and give focused reasons with specific details. Use linking words (for example, because, also) and avoid vague comments. One topic sentence plus two supporting details is enough.

例: Yes, I would like to visit the Eiffel Tower in Paris because it has famous restaurants and fantastic views from the top. For example, I would enjoy dining there and then going up to the observation deck to see the city panorama.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and two precise reasons, avoid repetition and unclear phrases. Use linking words like because and therefore, and correct common grammar mistakes (live, afraid of).

例: No, I don’t want to live in a tall building because I get nervous at high levels and apartments there are often small. Therefore, I prefer a low-rise house with a garden where I can feel more comfortable.

× No, near my home there are no any type of tall building because I am living in the rural area.

✓ No, near my home there are no tall buildings because I live in a rural area.

The phrase 'no any type of tall building' mixes negative quantifiers incorrectly; use 'no tall buildings' or 'not any tall buildings'. 'I am living' is awkward for a general fact; use simple present 'I live'. Also use 'a rural area' (article use relates to singular/plural and article rules).

× So in my area there are no one type of big buildings Twitter but also there are some small buildings appears.

✓ So in my area there are no big buildings, but there are some small buildings.

'no one type of big buildings' is incorrect for quantity and number agreement; use 'no big buildings'. 'Twitter' seems extraneous and was removed. 'appear' should not be used in this sentence; instead use simple present 'there are some small buildings'.

× No, I do not like to take photos of building.

✓ No, I do not like to take photos of buildings.

Countable noun 'building' needs plural when speaking generally: 'buildings'. Also 'photos of' is correct preposition but noun number must agree.

× Uh, I usually prefer taking photos of the view and also of myself because that's uh, very helpful for me to create small memories.

✓ I usually prefer taking photos of the view and of myself because it's very helpful for creating small memories.

'That's very helpful for me to create' is wordy and slightly ungrammatical; use 'it's very helpful for creating' or 'it's very helpful to create'. Both 'prefer taking' is acceptable; revised for natural phrasing and gerund use after 'for'.

× So I do not prefer to take photos of building because I do not like that ****.

✓ So I do not prefer to take photos of buildings because I do not like that.

Again, use plural 'buildings' for general reference. The censored word was left out; the sentence is corrected grammatically by removing the unknown token.

× Yes, there is a building in my district name as the Eiffel Tower.

✓ Yes, there is a building in my district called the Eiffel Tower.

Use 'called' to give the name of something. 'Name as' is incorrect. 'There is' is acceptable for existence; 'called' fixes naming structure.

× I like to visit that building because that building have a very expensive restaurant in it and the address of that building was very good.

✓ I would like to visit that building because it has a very expensive restaurant and its location is very good.

'Building have' is incorrect subject-verb agreement; singular subject requires 'has'. 'Would like' fits the hypothetical desire to visit. 'Address of that building was very good' is awkward; use 'its location is very good' and keep present tense for general facts.

× So that's why I like to visit that building.

✓ So that's why I would like to visit that building.

Followed previous conditional desire; 'would like' is more appropriate than simple present 'like' when expressing a wish to visit.

× And the rooftop of the building was also so good.

✓ And the rooftop of the building is also very nice.

Use 'is' for general description rather than past 'was'. 'So good' is informal; use 'very nice' for clearer adjectival phrase.

× No, I don't want to leave in the tall building because I do not like to live on the high building and also the room of the tall buildings are very small.

✓ No, I don't want to live in a tall building because I do not like to live in high buildings, and the rooms in tall buildings are very small.

'Leave' was wrong verb; should be 'live'. Use 'in' not 'on' for living in a building. Ensure subject-verb agreement: 'the rooms... are'. Use plural 'buildings' consistently and plural 'rooms'.

× However, I also afraid from the tallness of the building and also I do not like the room in Deadwood, so that's why.

✓ However, I am also afraid of the height of tall buildings, and I do not like the rooms in Deadwood, so that's why.

Use 'afraid of' not 'afraid from'. 'Tallness' is unnatural; use 'height' or 'tall buildings'. Make verb 'am' explicit: 'I am also afraid'. Clarify plural 'rooms' and place names usage.