Building— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời nên rõ ràng hơn, tránh ngập ngừng và sửa lỗi ngữ pháp/điều từ (ví dụ: 'city dweller' -> 'city dwellers'). Thêm liên từ để làm câu mạch lạc và cung cấp một hoặc hai chi tiết cụ thể hơn về tòa nhà nổi bật (ví dụ: chức năng, chiều cao, vị trí). Giữ độ dài không quá 5 câu.

例: Yes, there are a few tall buildings near my home. The most notable is Aaron Moore, an entertainment complex popular with city dwellers. Besides that, there are two or three residential apartment blocks along the main road.

提案: Câu trả lời tốt nhưng cần chính xác hơn và mạch lạc. Tránh lỗi lặp và ngữ pháp nhỏ (ví dụ: 'if it is beautiful' -> 'if they are beautiful' vì buildings số nhiều). Nên dùng liên từ để nối ý và thêm chi tiết ngắn về cảm nhận khi chụp (ví dụ: góc chụp, cảm xúc).

例: Yes, I often photograph buildings when I find them attractive. For example, on a trip to Ho Chi Minh City I photographed Landmark 81, the tallest building in Vietnam, and posted the photo on Instagram because I loved its modern design.

提案: Câu trả lời trực tiếp nhưng nên sửa tên để rõ ràng (ví dụ kiểm tra chính tả: 'Hyat Farm' có thể là 'Hyatt'?). Thêm một hoặc hai chi tiết cụ thể về lý do muốn tham quan (ví dụ: thiết kế nội thất, nhà hàng) và dùng liên từ để nối ý. Giữ dưới 5 câu.

例: Yes, I would like to visit the Poonam Hotel at the Hyatt Farm because its exterior looks very luxurious. I'm curious about the interior design and the restaurants there, but I haven't had the chance to go inside yet.

提案: Ý chính rõ nhưng có lỗi ngữ pháp và ý thứ hai mâu thuẫn/không rõ ràng ('with our good elevator system going up will be very tiring' không hợp lý). Cần sửa ngữ pháp (a good elevator system, ensures fire safety), loại bỏ mâu thuẫn, và giải thích ngắn vì sao bạn lo lắng hoặc thích sống ở tòa cao tầng. Dùng liên từ để làm rõ lý do.

例: Yes, I would consider living in a tall building if it has a reliable elevator system and proper fire safety measures. I am concerned about safety because I have heard about dangerous fire incidents in high-rises, so those protections are essential for me.

× The most outstanding is Aaron Moore, uh, an entertainment place for many city dweller, and there are also two or three apartment buildings as well.

✓ The most outstanding is Aaron Moore, uh, an entertainment place for many city dwellers, and there are also two or three apartment buildings as well.

The noun 'dweller' should be plural 'dwellers' because it refers to many people. Use plural nouns after quantifiers like 'many'. Suggestion: use plural for countable nouns when referring to more than one (e.g., 'many city dwellers').

× For example, when I visited Ho Chi Minh City, I took a picture of Landmark 81, which is the tallest landmark in Vietnam and then I posted on my Instagram.

✓ For example, when I visited Ho Chi Minh City, I took a picture of Landmark 81, which is the tallest landmark in Vietnam, and then I posted it on my Instagram.

The verb 'posted' is fine but the object is missing; 'posted' requires an object like 'it'. Use 'posted it on my Instagram'. Suggestion: always include the direct object after transitive verbs (e.g., 'posted it').

× Yes, it is Poonam Hotel in Hyat Farm which looks very luxurious outside.

✓ Yes, it is Poonam Hotel at Hyat Farm, which looks very luxurious on the outside.

Use correct preposition for locations: 'at Hyat Farm' is more natural than 'in' for named places like farms or venues. Also use the phrase 'on the outside' to describe exterior appearance. Suggestion: choose prepositions by collocation (e.g., 'at the park', 'on the campus', 'on the outside').

× I really want to visit the interior but I haven't had the chance yet.

✓ I really want to visit the interior, but I haven't had the chance yet.

The sentence is grammatically correct; only punctuation needed. The tense combination (present perfect 'haven't had' with present desire 'want') is appropriate. Suggestion: add a comma before 'but' to join two independent clauses. Note: marked as past tense issue only for confirmation of tense usage.

× Yes, if it has good elevator system and ensures fire safety.

✓ Yes, if it has a good elevator system and ensures fire safety.

The singular noun 'elevator system' requires an article 'a' when singular and countable. Use 'a good elevator system'. Suggestion: include articles with singular countable nouns ('a', 'an', or 'the').

× I have heard many fire accidents which are really terrifying and with our good elevator system going up will be very tiring.

✓ I have heard of many fire accidents, which are really terrifying, and going up with a faulty elevator system would be very dangerous.

Several issues: 'heard many fire accidents' should be 'heard of many fire accidents' (verb + preposition), relative clause punctuation needed, and 'our good elevator system going up will be very tiring' is unclear and ungrammatical. Also 'tiring' is wrong word for danger—use 'dangerous' or 'risky' or say 'it would be difficult' depending on meaning. Suggestion: use 'heard of' for awareness, separate clauses with commas, and choose appropriate adjectives ('dangerous' vs 'tiring').