Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and clear. Start with a direct topic sentence naming your favourite food, avoid hesitations and filler words, correct vocabulary (e.g., ‘snack’ not ‘snacks’ or unclear item names), and give one brief reason. Use one linking word if you add a second supporting detail.

例: My favourite food is pizza and sandwiches, especially when they are homemade. They are convenient and comforting, and I also enjoy soya-based snacks because they are tasty and relatively healthy.

提案: Answer directly with a topic sentence in past tense ('I liked...'), avoid repetition and fillers, and give a specific reason or example. Use a linking word to connect ideas (e.g., 'because' or 'so'). Correct word forms (e.g., 'comfort food' and 'fast meals').

例: When I was young, I liked pizza, sandwiches and soya snacks. I liked them because they were quick to eat after school and felt like comforting treats.

提案: Be specific about seasonal changes and use correct tenses. Start with a clear yes/no and follow with one or two specific examples of foods you eat in different seasons. Avoid vague statements and unnecessary hesitation.

例: Yes. In winter I prefer hot, hearty soups and stews, while in summer I eat more salads and fruit because they are refreshing and cooling.

提案: Give a clear direct response to the question (Yes or No) and then explain briefly with one or two specific reasons and examples. Use past and present tenses correctly and avoid long hesitations. Keep to two or three sentences maximum.

例: Yes, it has changed. As a child I mostly ate home-cooked, healthy meals because my parents planned my diet, but now I often choose fast food because it is convenient when I am busy.

× Well I am a foodie person and I love always junk food in which like umm umm pizza sandwich and soya charm because I think it is a delicious and healthy snacks.

✓ Well, I am a foodie and I always love junk food such as pizza, sandwiches, and soya chunks because I think they are delicious and make tasty snacks.

Errors: awkward adjective/adverb order ('love always' should be 'always love'), redundant 'person' after 'foodie', wrong item name 'soya charm' (likely 'soya chunks'), incorrect article and plural agreement ('a delicious and healthy snacks') and use of 'in which like'. Suggestion: place adverbs before main verb ('always love'), use 'such as' to introduce examples, use correct plural forms for countable nouns ('sandwiches', 'soya chunks'), and ensure subject-verb and adjective-noun agreement ('they are delicious'). Improve by writing simpler, correctly ordered phrases and checking singular/plural and adjective-noun agreement.

× I enjoy different kind of food but my favorite are pizza, sandwich and soya chomper. Uh, pizza and sandwich taste greater comfort and fast meal.

✓ I enjoy different kinds of food, but my favorites are pizza, sandwiches, and soya chunks. Pizza and sandwiches provide great comfort and are quick meals.

Errors: 'different kind' should be plural 'different kinds', 'favorite are' should agree with plural 'favorites', 'sandwich' should be plural, 'soya chomper' is incorrect word choice, and 'taste greater comfort and fast meal' is ungrammatical. Suggestion: use plural forms when listing multiple items, use 'provide' with 'comfort', and 'quick meals' or 'fast meals' for meaning. Use correct vocabulary ('soya chunks'). Improve by matching number agreement and choosing collocations ('provide comfort', 'quick meal').

× Yes, of course I eat different foods and different time of the years, uh, uh, in my childhood I am very uh, uh, conscious person and uh, follow that diet, but nowadays I'm always so much eat.

✓ Yes, of course I eat different foods at different times of the year. When I was a child I was very health-conscious and followed a strict diet, but nowadays I eat a lot of fast food.

Errors: incorrect prepositions and pluralization ('different time of the years' -> 'different times of the year'), wrong tense ('in my childhood I am' should be past 'I was'), wrong adjective form ('conscious person' -> 'health-conscious'), incorrect verb forms and word order ('follow that diet' -> 'followed a strict diet'), and awkward phrase 'I'm always so much eat' -> 'I eat a lot'. Suggestion: use correct prepositions ('at different times'), use past tense for past habits, and use standard collocations ('eat a lot', 'follow a diet'). Improve by reviewing preposition usage and tense consistency.

× Uh, my has a my, uh, favorite who older my food fabric, uh, event, uh, where a child, umm, in child time I follow the diet, but uh, uh, nowadays, uh, I am more much eat, uh, fast food.

✓ When I was a child I followed a diet, but now my eating habits have changed and I eat much more fast food.

Errors: sentence is fragmented and contains many fillers making structure unclear. Problems include incorrect word order ('my has a my favorite who older my food fabric'), incorrect tense consistency, and poor phrasing ('I am more much eat'). Suggestion: remove fillers, combine ideas into a clear contrasting sentence using past simple for past habit ('I followed a diet') and present simple or present perfect to describe change ('my eating habits have changed', 'I eat much more fast food'). Improve by planning the sentence before speaking: state past habit, then state present contrast, use correct verb forms and clear nouns.