Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cải thiện: Nói ngắn gọn, trực tiếp và mạch lạc hơn; tránh filler (umm, uh) và lỗi ngữ pháp. Cụ thể, mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề rõ ràng (My favourite food is rice), sau đó đưa 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể (ví dụ: cách chế biến yêu thích, lý do dinh dưỡng, vai trò văn hoá). Sử dụng liên từ đơn giản để kết nối ý (because, and, also).

例: My favourite food is rice. I eat it almost every day because it is a staple in Vietnam and provides energy for my work. I especially like steamed jasmine rice with grilled fish, which is simple but very satisfying.

提案: Cải thiện: Trả lời trực tiếp, tránh cấu trúc mơ hồ như “the main thing you need to know”. Sửa ngữ pháp (children's → children) và loại bỏ filler. Nên nêu một câu chủ đề rồi giải thích với lý do và một ví dụ cụ thể từ kinh nghiệm cá nhân (ví dụ: yêu thích món cụ thể, lúc nào ăn).

例: When I was young, I loved fast food, especially fried chicken. I often ate it as a treat after school because it tasted tasty and was easy to share with friends.

提案: Cải thiện: Trả lời câu hỏi về sự thay đổi theo mùa hoặc theo thời gian (weekday/weekend). Tránh câu lủng củng và từ sai (test → eat, taste a few → eat more treats). Nên nói rõ: vào tuần làm việc tôi ăn gì, vào cuối tuần tôi ăn gì, kèm lý do và một ví dụ cụ thể. Dùng liên từ để kết nối ý.

例: I don't change my diet much by season, but I do eat differently on weekdays and weekends. On weekdays I choose healthy meals like salad and grilled chicken because I want to stay fit, while at the weekend I sometimes enjoy desserts or pizza as a treat.

提案: Cải thiện: Trả lời trực tiếp: có hay không thay đổi, rồi nêu lý do và thời điểm thay đổi. Sửa ngữ pháp (when I was twice → when I was a child/young, I'm teenager → as a teenager). Tránh filler, dùng cấu trúc đơn giản để thể hiện quá khứ và hiện tại (I used to… / Now I…).

例: Yes, it has changed. I used to eat a lot of fast food like fried chicken when I was a child, but as a teenager I became more health-conscious and now I prefer balanced meals with vegetables and lean protein.

× I would like to mention this to rice because rice is very popular in my country and eating rice is very healthy for my body.

✓ I would like to mention rice because rice is very popular in my country and eating rice is very healthy for my body.

The phrase 'mention this to rice' uses incorrect pronouns/particles. Remove 'this to' and say 'mention rice'. Use clear direct object placement: 'mention rice'. Suggestion: Say 'I would like to mention rice' or simply 'My favourite food is rice.'

× Umm, in addition I suppose I should say right, it's playing part and role in Vietnam.

✓ In addition, I suppose I should say it plays an important part and role in Vietnam.

Original uses incorrect verb form and word order: 'it's playing part and role' is ungrammatical. Use simple present 'it plays' for general facts. Add adjective 'important' for clarity and include articles: 'an important part and role.' Suggestion: Use 'it plays an important part in Vietnam'.

× The main thing you need to know is fast foods because umm many many children's enjoy eating fast food like fried chicken because it's very attractive and it's a delicious meal for many children is a work.

✓ The main thing you need to know is fast food because many children enjoy eating fast food like fried chicken; it is very appealing and a delicious meal for many children.

Errors: 'fast foods' -> 'fast food' as a general uncountable noun; 'children's' is incorrect possessive, should be plural 'children'; sentence had extra clause 'is a work' removed. Use 'appealing' instead of 'attractive' for food. Suggestion: Keep nouns in correct countable/uncountable form and avoid possessive when plural subject is intended.

× On the weekday I always test the healthy food because I my because my body is very important and the weekends I taste a few.

✓ On weekdays I always try to eat healthy food because my body is very important to me, and on weekends I try a few different foods.

Problems: 'On the weekday' should be 'On weekdays' (general habit). 'test the healthy food' is incorrect; use 'try to eat healthy food' or 'eat healthy food'. Repetition 'because I my because my' is wrong. 'the weekends I taste a few' -> 'on weekends I try a few different foods.' Use present simple for habits. Suggestion: Use consistent habitual present tense and correct collocations: 'try to eat healthy food'.

× Honestly, the main thing you need to know is, uh, when I was twice I prefer eating, uh, fast food like fried chicken.

✓ Honestly, the main thing you need to know is that when I was two I preferred eating fast food like fried chicken.

Errors: 'when I was twice' should be 'when I was two' (age expression). 'prefer eating' should be past tense 'preferred' to match 'when I was'. Use 'that' to introduce the clause. Suggestion: Use correct age expression and match verb tense to past time reference.

× But when I'm teenager, uh, my body is very important and I have changed my B, my nutrient diet.

✓ But when I was a teenager, I cared more about my body and I changed my diet to be more nutritious.

Errors: 'I'm teenager' should be 'I was a teenager' (past reference) and requires article 'a'. 'my body is very important' awkward; better 'I cared more about my body.' 'I have changed my B, my nutrient diet' is unclear; use 'I changed my diet to be more nutritious.' Use past tense for past period. Suggestion: Use appropriate article 'a teenager', match past tense, and use clear phrasing 'changed my diet to be more nutritious.'