Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar and avoid filler words. Use precise adjectives and a short supporting reason with a linking word. For example, say why you like strawberries (taste, health, availability) and correct mistakes like 'healthier' (compare) and 'lots of vitamin' → 'lots of vitamins'.

例: My favourite food is strawberries. I like them because they taste sweet and are rich in vitamins, so they make me feel healthier. Also, they are available year-round in my area, which makes them a convenient snack.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence and use past tense correctly. Avoid unclear words (‘soaring’, 'property') and unnecessary fillers. Give a brief reason and a linking word (e.g. 'because' or 'so'). Be specific about feelings or occasions (e.g. treats, birthday).

例: When I was young, I loved eating chocolate. I often asked for it because it was a special treat and I could not afford it often, so I felt very happy when I had some.

提案: Good structure and specific examples. Improve fluency by removing fillers and adding a linking phrase to compare seasons (e.g. 'for example' or 'in contrast'). You can add one brief detail about why you eat these foods to enrich the answer.

例: Yes. For example, during the Spring Festival I usually eat dumplings because they symbolise wealth, while at the Mid-Autumn Festival I eat mooncakes to celebrate the full moon with my family.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence about change and use correct grammar (past vs present). Remove confusing phrases ('there was a child', 'throw it into strawberry'). Explain reasons concisely with linking words like 'because' or 'so'.

例: Yes, my favourite food has changed. When I was a child I liked chocolate because it felt like a rare treat, but now I prefer strawberries because I am more health-conscious and enjoy fresh fruit.

× My favorite food is strawberry. It's so healthier and uh, the fruit has uh, lots of vitamin. I think it, it can make me more healthier and uh, organic.

✓ My favorite food is strawberries. They are very healthy, and the fruit has lots of vitamins. I think they can make me healthier and are organic.

Errors: singular/plural and adjective/adverb use. 'strawberry' should be plural 'strawberries' when speaking generally (Grammar Problem Type ID 1). 'so healthier' and 'more healthier' are incorrect because 'healthier' is already comparative; use 'very healthy' or 'healthier' without 'so/more' (Grammar Problem Type ID 13). 'lots of vitamin' should be 'lots of vitamins' (plural) (Grammar Problem Type ID 1). Also pronoun 'it' should match plural 'they' when referring to strawberries (Grammar Problem Type ID 12). Suggestion: use correct plural nouns for general statements, use 'healthy' or 'healthier' appropriately (no double comparative), and match pronouns to noun number.

× Back in my childhood, I soaring to chocolates because, umm, at that time I'm so poor and my family is, uh, property and, uh, I want to eat some chocolate because the chocolate prices.

✓ Back in my childhood, I used to love chocolate because at that time I was very poor and my family had little property, and I wanted to eat chocolate because of the price.

Errors: incorrect verb form 'soaring to' should be 'used to love' to express past habitual action (Grammar Problem Type ID 5). 'I'm so poor' should be past 'I was very poor' to match past timeframe (Grammar Problem Type ID 5). 'my family is, uh, property' is incorrect; likely meant 'had little property' or 'didn't have property' (Grammar Problem Type ID 26/11); corrected to 'my family had little property' (subject-verb tense and noun use). 'I want to eat' should be past 'I wanted to eat' to match past context (Grammar Problem Type ID 5). 'because the chocolate prices' is incomplete; corrected to 'because of the price'.

× Yes, For instance, umm uh, in China in the uh, Spring festival, uh, I usually eat some dumplings. In mid autumn festival I eat mooncakes.

✓ Yes. For instance, in China, during the Spring Festival I usually eat dumplings. At the Mid-Autumn Festival I eat mooncakes.

Errors: preposition and article use. Use 'during' for events or periods (Grammar Problem Type ID 11). Capitalization of festival names and correct article 'the' before 'Mid-Autumn Festival' needed (Grammar Problem Type ID 17/22). Also punctuation and commas help clarity. Suggestion: use 'during' for festival periods and 'at' or 'on' plus 'the' for specific festivals.

× Yes, there was a child. I like chocolate, but right now my family is richer and uh, I, I can't eat lots of chocolates and I don't worried about the price. Umm. And now my favorite food is strawberry. I throw it into strawberry.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I liked chocolate, but now my family is richer and I can't eat lots of chocolate and I don't worry about the price. Now my favorite food is strawberries. I eat a lot of strawberries.

Errors: tense and agreement mismatches. 'There was a child' is unnatural for 'when I was a child' (Grammar Problem Type ID 26). 'I like chocolate' should be past 'I liked chocolate' to reference childhood (Grammar Problem Type ID 5). 'right now' requires present tense 'my family is richer' is fine; 'I can't eat lots of chocolates' should be 'I can't eat lots of chocolate' or 'I don't eat a lot of chocolate' (Grammar Problem Type ID 1/27). 'I don't worried' must be 'I don't worry' (auxiliary + base form) (Grammar Problem Type ID 2/6). 'favorite food is strawberry' should be plural 'strawberries' (Grammar Problem Type ID 1). 'I throw it into strawberry' is unclear and ungrammatical; corrected to 'I eat a lot of strawberries' to convey intended meaning (Grammar Problem Type ID 26). Suggestion: keep tense consistent when contrasting past and present, use base verb after do/does/did, use plural nouns for general preferences, and choose clear verbs like 'eat'.