Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more grammatically accurate, concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct verb tenses, avoid repetition, and add one specific detail about why you like sushi (ingredients or experience). Use a linking word to connect sentences.

例: My favourite food is Japanese cuisine, especially sushi. I love sushi because it tastes very fresh and has delicate flavors from the fish and seasoned rice. Also, when I travel to Japan I often eat sushi at local restaurants, which makes the experience even more enjoyable.

提案: Organize with a clear topic sentence and use correct tense and clearer vocabulary. Remove filler words and give specific details about ingredients and why you preferred it (texture, comfort, family tradition). Use a linking word to add a reason.

例: When I was young, I loved eating rice soup. It usually had seaweed, pork and vegetables, and because it was lightly seasoned it felt comforting and homely. For that reason, it became my favourite childhood meal.

提案: Avoid repetition and hesitations; give a concise topic sentence then two specific seasonal examples. Use linking words (for example, in contrast, during) and correct prepositions and articles.

例: Yes, I eat different foods at different times of the year. For example, at New Year I usually enjoy barbecued dishes with my family, while in summer I prefer cold foods such as chilled noodles because they are refreshing in the heat.

提案: Give a clear contrast between past and present using linking words (however, now). Correct word choices ("milder flavours" instead of "my flavor food") and provide one specific example of a dish you now enjoy and why (ingredients, sensation).

例: Yes, it has changed. As a child I preferred milder flavours, but now I enjoy stronger, spicier dishes. For example, I like Tom Yum Goong because its bold, sour and spicy broth really appeals to my current taste buds.

× I really love to eat sushi because it is so fresh and fantastic flavor.

✓ I really love to eat sushi because it is so fresh and has a fantastic flavor.

The original sentence mixes an adjective phrase with a noun without correct structure. 'Fantastic flavor' is a noun phrase, so you need a verb to link it to 'it' (e.g., 'has'). Alternatively use an adjective: 'tastes fantastic.' Suggestion: use 'has a fantastic flavor' or 'tastes fantastic.'

× So I ate it all the time when I'm going to Japan.

✓ So I ate it all the time when I went to Japan.

The clause 'when I'm going to Japan' uses present progressive, which conflicts with 'ate' (past). Use past tense in both parts: 'when I went to Japan.' Maintain consistent past tense for past habitual actions.

× It's it's made me feel comfortable.

✓ It has made me feel comfortable.

The original has a repeated contraction 'It's it's' and incorrect tense/form. For a present perfect meaning (experience up to now), use 'It has made me...' or for simple past use 'It made me feel comfortable.' Remove duplicate 'it's.'

× When I was young I really loved to eat soup with rice because of its really my taste in that soup contain the umm seaweed and pork and some vegetable without any seasoning so I really loved it.

✓ When I was young, I really loved eating soup with rice because it suited my taste; that soup contained seaweed, pork, and some vegetables without any seasoning, so I really loved it.

Multiple problems: 'its really my taste' is incorrect pronoun and phrasing; use 'suited my taste' or 'was to my taste.' 'Contain' should be past tense 'contained' to match 'When I was young.' 'Some vegetable' should be plural 'some vegetables.' Also prefer 'loved eating' (gerund) after 'loved.' Break into clearer clauses and use commas to improve readability.

× Yes I do I do. I do eat different foods at different time of the year.

✓ Yes, I do. I eat different foods at different times of the year.

Redundant repetitions 'I do I do' should be reduced to a single 'I do.' 'Different time' should be plural 'different times' because it refers to multiple occasions during the year.

× In the umm beginning of the year at the new year I really love to eat BBQ but after that in on summer I really love the ice and cold food like cold noodles.

✓ At the beginning of the year, for New Year, I really love to eat BBQ, but later in the summer I really like cold foods such as cold noodles.

Use 'at the beginning of the year' or 'for New Year' rather than 'in the beginning of the year at the new year.' 'After that in on summer' mixes prepositions; use 'in the summer.' 'Love the ice and cold food' is ungrammatical; use 'like cold foods' or 'enjoy cold dishes.' Also pluralize 'foods' when speaking generally.

× When I was young I really loved to eat my flavor food, but when I grew up I prefer to eat stronger tastes like spicy and salty food like uh Tom Yum goong or uh pacapao like this.

✓ When I was young I really loved mild-flavored food, but when I grew up I prefer stronger tastes, such as spicy and salty foods like Tom Yum Goong or pad krapow.

'My flavor food' is incorrect; likely 'mild-flavored food' or 'milder flavors.' Use 'prefer' in present tense to reflect current preference—'I prefer' rather than 'I prefer to eat' (both acceptable but shorter is natural). 'Stronger tastes like spicy and salty food' should be 'stronger tastes, such as spicy and salty foods.' Proper noun spelling: 'Tom Yum Goong.' 'Pacapao' likely refers to 'pad krapow' (Thai basil stir-fry), so use a standard romanization. Also pluralize 'foods' for general categories.