Food— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct small grammar and word-choice issues. Begin with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and use one or two supporting reasons with linking words. Also correct articles and singular/plural (e.g., 'a person who loves' OK, but remove duplicate phrases).

例: My favourite food is carbonara. I prefer it because I enjoy creamy, saucy dishes, and carbonara combines rich cheese and silky sauce perfectly. For example, its creamy texture and salty pancetta make it very satisfying.

提案: Correct tense and grammar, and organize into a clear topic sentence plus specific supporting details. Remove filler phrases and use linking words like 'because' or 'so' correctly. Use past tense consistently when talking about childhood.

例: When I was young, my favourite food was hot dogs. This was because my uncle worked at a hot dog shop and often gave us hot dogs, so I ate them frequently. As a result, I would ask my mother to make hot dogs for me almost every morning.

提案: Use correct subject-verb agreement and more precise phrasing. Start with a direct response, then add one or two specific examples and a linking word. Avoid repeating 'so' and fix errors like 'don't' -> 'don't' for I don't, and 'my go to' -> 'my go-to'.

例: Not really — I don't eat pork or seafood, so I mainly eat chicken throughout the year. For example, I often have grilled chicken, chicken stir-fries, or chicken salads, along with seasonal fruits and vegetables.

提案: Use correct grammar (past tense and subject-verb agreement) and organize into a clear comparison: past vs present. Be specific about when and why the change happened, using linking words like 'however' or 'because'. Avoid unclear fragments like 'and a per' and explain 'it's cheese' more clearly.

例: Yes, it has changed. When I was a child my favourite food was hot dogs, but over the years I discovered pasta dishes such as spaghetti and carbonara. Because I enjoy creamy, cheesy sauces, carbonara became my favourite instead.

× I think the favorite food that I like when I was young was hot dog because my I have an uncle who worked in a hot dog shop and he always gave us hot dogs.

✓ I think the favorite food I liked when I was young was hot dogs because I had an uncle who worked in a hot dog shop and he always gave us hot dogs.

Errors: unnecessary phrase 'that I like' and incorrect pronoun/word order 'my I have'. Tense consistency: 'was' with 'liked' and 'had' fits past narrative. Use plural 'hot dogs' for countable items when speaking generally. Suggestion: simplify relative clause and keep consistent past tense: 'I liked' and 'I had an uncle'.

× And because of that, that's the moment I like it.

✓ And because of that, that's when I started to like it.

Error: present tense 'like' conflicts with past time reference 'that's the moment'. Use past tense 'started to like' to show when preference began. Suggestion: use 'started to' or 'began to' with past tense for past events.

× And every time, like every morning, I will ask my mom to cook hot dog for me.

✓ And every morning, I would ask my mom to cook hot dogs for me.

Error: modal 'will' is inappropriate for habitual past action; use 'would' to describe repeated past habits. Also use plural 'hot dogs' and simplify 'every time, like every morning' to 'every morning'.

× So to tell you honestly I am a person who don't eat pork and seafood so mostly I only eat chicken or anything that was made with chicken.

✓ To be honest, I am a person who doesn't eat pork or seafood, so mostly I only eat chicken or things made with chicken.

Errors: 'don't' should be 'doesn't' because subject 'a person who' is singular; use 'or' not 'and' in this context and 'anything that was made with chicken' is awkward — 'things made with chicken' is natural. Also 'to tell you honestly' is better as 'to be honest'.

× So aside from vegetables and fruits I my go to food is chicken.

✓ So aside from vegetables and fruits, my go-to food is chicken.

Errors: stray 'I' is extraneous and punctuation needed. Use compound adjective 'go-to' with hyphen. Suggestion: remove extra pronoun and add comma for clarity.

× Yes, my favorite food change since I were a child before.

✓ Yes, my favorite food has changed since I was a child.

Errors: verb 'change' should be present perfect 'has changed' to indicate change over time; subject 'I' with 'were' incorrect — use 'was'. Remove redundant 'before'.

× I love hot dog, but throughout the years when I discover spaghetti, carbonara and a per and I am a person who love something creamy.

✓ I loved hot dogs, but throughout the years, when I discovered spaghetti and carbonara, and because I am a person who loves creamy food, my preference changed.

Multiple tense and agreement errors: 'I love' should be past 'I loved' when referring to past preference; 'discover' should be past 'discovered'; 'a per and' is unclear (removed) and 'I am a person who love' needs 'loves'. Rephrase to clarify reason and maintain tense consistency.

× Right now hot dog is not really my favorite.

✓ Right now, hot dogs are not really my favorite.

Errors: use plural 'hot dogs' when speaking generally and plural verb 'are'. Add comma after introductory phrase. Suggestion: match noun number and verb form for general statements.

× It's carbonara, so it's cheese.

✓ It's carbonara, so it's cheesy and creamy.

Error: 'it's cheese' is awkward and ungrammatical when describing a dish's quality. Use adjectives (cheesy, creamy) to describe the characteristics of carbonara. Suggestion: describe food with appropriate adjectives rather than 'is' plus noun.