Keys— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise, correct grammar and use clear vocabulary. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific reasons using linking words. Avoid repetition and unclear phrases.

例: No, I usually carry only a few keys. For example, I keep my house key and one padlock key because carrying many metal keys is heavy and inconvenient. Therefore I try to minimize what I take.

提案: Give a clear, chronological account with correct tense and specific details. Use linking words (for example, then, afterwards) and avoid filler words. Mention what happened and how you felt or what you did afterwards.

例: Yes, I once lost my keys in senior high. After I left school I realised they were missing and I couldn't unlock my front door. It was frustrating, so I asked my parents for help and searched my bag and pockets carefully.

提案: Answer directly, use a clear reason and give a specific habit to show change. Use correct verb forms and cohesive linking words (since, so) and avoid repetition.

例: No, I rarely forget my keys now. Since that incident in senior high, I always put them on a keyring in my handbag so I can check for them before I leave. As a result, I haven't been locked out again.

提案: State your opinion clearly, then give specific conditions and reasons using linking words (if, because, but). Avoid vague phrases and improve sentence structure and vocabulary (acquaintance → know).

例: I think it can be a good idea if you trust your neighbour. If you know them well and have a good relationship, leaving a spare key can be convenient. However, if you don't know them, I would avoid it for security reasons.

× Well, normally I won't take lots of key with me because I think it's a little bit inconvenient to bring this dream of heavy kills myself and because they are made of metal, it's kind of heavy.

✓ Well, normally I won't take lots of keys with me because I think it's a little bit inconvenient to carry such a bunch of heavy keys, and because they are made of metal, they're quite heavy.

Errors: singular/plural and article usage ('key' should be 'keys'); awkward phrasing ('bring this dream of heavy kills myself' is incorrect and likely intended 'carry such a bunch of heavy keys'); contraction and pronoun agreement ('they are' -> 'they're'). Suggestion: Use plural nouns for multiple items, keep noun phrases simple ('a bunch of heavy keys' or 'many keys'), and use appropriate verbs ('carry').

× Uh, yes, I have these kinds of experience in my Senior High School, you know, when I set off to my school have got to bring it with me and when I return to my house, I cannot, I couldn't find my keys.

✓ Uh, yes, I had this kind of experience in senior high school. When I set off for school I had to bring my keys with me, and when I returned home I couldn't find them.

Errors: tense inconsistency and incorrect verb forms. 'Have these kinds of experience' should be past ('had this kind of experience'). 'Set off to my school have got to bring it' mixes present and incorrect modals; use past 'had to bring my keys'. 'When I return to my house, I cannot, I couldn't find my keys' mixes present and past; use past 'returned' and 'couldn't find them'. Suggestion: Keep narrative events in past tense and use consistent pronouns ('keys' -> 'them').

× Uh, no, no, no. Since since that time in my, since that experience happened in my Senior High School, uh, I always remember to bring my key with me.

✓ Uh, no. Since that experience in senior high school, I have always remembered to bring my keys with me.

Errors: tense and article/number. After 'since' used with a past event, use present perfect ('have always remembered') rather than simple present 'always remember'. Also 'key' should be plural 'keys' when referring generically. Suggestion: Use present perfect to link past event to current habit and match plural nouns when appropriate.

× I put a string of key in my handbag.

✓ I put a key ring in my handbag.

Error: incorrect and awkward preposition and noun phrase. 'String of key' is not standard; use 'key ring' or 'a bunch of keys' and 'in my handbag' is fine. Suggestion: Use standard collocations: 'key ring', 'a bunch of keys', 'on my key ring'.

× So in most of the time I, I not do it again.

✓ So most of the time I don't do it again.

Errors: incorrect negation and article/phrase. 'In most of the time' should be 'most of the time' and use auxiliary 'do' with n't ('don't'). Suggestion: Use correct adverbial phrase 'most of the time' and correct negative form 'I don't'.

× Ah, well, I think it might be a good idea to leave the key with my neighbor if I do know him well, if we so many wish each other.

✓ Ah, well, I think it might be a good idea to leave a key with my neighbor if I know him well and we trust each other.

Errors: pronoun and idiom misuse. 'Do know him well' can be simplified to 'know him well'; 'if we so many wish each other' is incorrect — intended 'trust each other'. Also use indefinite article 'a key'. Suggestion: Use correct collocations: 'know him well', 'trust each other', and use 'a key' when speaking of one key.

× But in in the most of the for the most of the day in my life, I I don't acquaintance with my neighbor.

✓ But for most of the time in my life, I don't know my neighbors well.

Errors: wrong word choice and pluralization. 'Don't acquaintance with' is incorrect; use 'don't know' or 'am not acquainted with'. Also 'neighbor' likely plural 'neighbors' when referring generally. Suggestion: Use 'am not acquainted with my neighbours' or 'don't know my neighbors well' for clarity.

× So, uh, I won't do it, But it it depends, right?

✓ So, uh, I probably wouldn't do it, but it depends, right?

Errors: modal and sentence flow. 'I won't do it' is too definite; 'probably wouldn't' is more natural. Capitalization error after comma. Suggestion: Use appropriate modal to express uncertainty ('would'/'probably') and ensure conjunction 'but' follows lowercase after comma.