Walking— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Сократите повторения, говорите короче и яснее. Начните с прямого ответа, затем добавьте 1–2 конкретные причины без лишних повтораў и с корректной грамматикой. Используйте связки (because, so, for example) и простые выражения для объяснения пользы ходьбы.

例: Yes, I walk a lot. I often go for walks because they help me think clearly and solve problems. For example, when I have a difficult task at work I usually walk for thirty minutes and then I can focus better.

提案: Отвечайте во времени Past для детства и избегайте бессвязных фраз. Дайте одно предложение с ответом в прошедшем времени и одно дополнительное конкретное воспоминание или пример. Используйте связки (when, because, for example).

例: Yes, I did. When I was a child I often walked outside with my family because we liked exploring our neighborhood. For example, I remember walking to the park every Sunday and talking with my parents about school.

提案: Сформулируйте четко причину и добавьте 1–2 конкретных преимущества парка. Избегайте переводных выражений и некорректной структуры. Используйте связки (because, so, for example) и подходящую лексику (fresh air, relax, reduce stress).

例: People like walking in parks because the fresh air and nature help them relax and reduce stress. For example, many people find that a 20-minute walk among trees clears their mind and improves their mood.

提案: Отвечайте прямо на гипотетический вопрос, используйте конструкцию условного наклонения (I would like to) и добавьте 1–2 конкретных причин и пример. Упростите фразы и используйте правильные слова (surrounded, reduce stress, notice inspiration).

例: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk in a quiet park. It helps me relax and notice new ideas; for example, I often get inspiration when I see birds and listen to nature.

提案: Отвечайте в прошедшем времени и назовите конкретное место и время. Избегайте путаницы времен (past vs future). Дайте короткое объяснение почему вы ходили туда и один конкретный деталь (например, слушали музыку).

例: Recently I went for a walk in the small park near my home last night. I went there to relax and I listened to music on my headphones while walking.

× I walk a lot of a great a lot of times I prefer a walk.

✓ I walk a lot; many times I prefer to take a walk.

The student used awkward phrasing and incorrect forms. 'Prefer a walk' should be 'prefer to take a walk' ( verb + to-infinitive). Also 'a great a lot of times' is ungrammatical; replace with 'many times'. Use consistent verb form 'walk' as simple present for habitual action.

× What does it mean? I walks.

✓ What does it mean? I walk.

The student used 'walks' with the first person singular subject 'I'. In present simple, verbs for 'I' use the base form without -s: 'I walk'.

× Walks make my brain where you're realizing to my future works and I make solve my problem very right ways and I made realizing for a future my works and that is it very perfectly great for me when I'm walking.

✓ Walking clears my mind, helps me think about my future work, and helps me solve my problems. It is very beneficial for me when I'm walking.

The original is a run-on with incorrect word order and verb forms. Use gerund 'Walking' as subject, concise clauses, and correct verb forms: 'helps me think', 'helps me solve'. Avoid awkward phrases like 'made realizing' and 'very right ways'.

× Yes I do when I was a child always I would like to go outside for a walk.

✓ Yes. When I was a child, I always liked to go outside for a walk.

Tense inconsistency: the question asks about the past, so use past tense 'liked' not present 'do' or 'would like'. Also fix word order: 'When I was a child, I always liked...'.

× What does it mean exactly when I'm walking? I realizing from my future works.

✓ What I mean is that when I'm walking, I realize things about my future work.

'Realizing' is misused; use the simple present 'I realize' when describing a habitual or general observation during walking. Rearrange to 'What I mean is that...' for clarity.

× I said when I was younger also I did it and it it solved me great all of my problems and it did me realizing for me for my problems in a.

✓ I did this when I was younger too, and it helped me solve many problems and made me more aware of how to handle them.

Multiple issues: repetition, wrong verb forms ('solved me'), and incomplete ending. Use 'helped me solve' and 'made me more aware' for correct expression.

× Well, I would like to say some people have a great mind that is it exactly make their mind calm down by walking in a park.

✓ Some people have a mind that becomes calm when they walk in a park.

Awkward phrasing 'that is it exactly make' and article misuse. Use 'becomes calm' or 'is calmed' and correct word order: 'mind that becomes calm when they walk'.

× Exactly park has a some fresh air for the people.

✓ A park has some fresh air for people.

Wrong determiner order 'a some'—choose either 'a' or 'some'. 'A park' or 'parks' depending on meaning; here singular 'A park has some fresh air' is natural.

× When the people are walking there, the fresh will be any higher to their mind and you can find is immediately and easily your future solutions.

✓ When people walk there, the fresh air lifts their spirits and you can more easily find solutions for the future.

Pronoun and noun issues: 'the fresh' is vague—use 'the fresh air'. 'Any higher to their mind' is incorrect; use 'lifts their spirits' or 'clears their mind'. Adjust verb forms for clarity.

× That's a magnificent for.

✓ That's magnificent.

Fragment and wrong article use. 'Magnificent' is an adjective; omit 'a' and complete the thought: 'That's magnificent.'

× Well, I would like to tell you definitely park for me is a very well exactly when I'm walking in a park.

✓ I would definitely say that parks are very good for me when I walk in them.

Awkward adverb placement and article use. Use 'definitely say' and plural 'parks' or 'a park' with clear structure: 'parks are very good for me when I walk in them.'

× It's helped me relaxing and clearing my mind.

✓ It helps me relax and clear my mind.

Tense and verb form: 'helps' (present) matches habitual action; use bare infinitives 'relax' and 'clear' after 'helps', not '-ing' forms.

× Park also offer fresh iron nature surrounded which is it can reduce stress and make it easier to see insulation to problem.

✓ Parks also offer fresh air and natural surroundings, which can reduce stress and make it easier to find solutions to problems.

Many wrong words: 'iron' should be 'air'; 'nature surrounded' -> 'natural surroundings'; 'see insulation to problem' -> 'find solutions to problems'. Ensure subject-verb agreement 'Parks also offer'.

× For example, I often find new idea when I'm walking in my traditionally seeing the birds.

✓ For example, I often find new ideas when I'm walking and watching the birds.

Use plural 'ideas' and correct gerund phrase 'watching the birds' instead of 'traditionally seeing the birds'. Keep parallel gerunds: 'walking and watching'.

× Well, I would like to tell one more time to when I when the day is late I will go for a walk.

✓ I want to say again that when the day is late, I go for a walk.

Tense mismatch: talking about habitual recent behavior uses present simple 'I go' rather than future 'I will go'. Remove extra words 'would like to tell one more time to' and simplify.

× Also at the park was the the near park from our home always is the open in a night and a day in a light night also in a late night is for many magnificent for me to relax in my mind I will put my headphones that give me some extra.

✓ There is a park near our home that is open day and night. It is very pleasant for me to relax there; I often put on my headphones to enjoy some extra music.

Multiple errors: duplicate 'the the', wrong article use, word order, and awkward adjectives. Use 'There is a park near our home' (there be structure) and clarify 'open day and night', 'pleasant' instead of 'magnificent', and proper clause structure 'I often put on my headphones'.