Walking— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời thiếu rõ ràng và ngữ pháp nhiều lỗi khiến người nghe khó hiểu. Hãy trả lời trực tiếp rồi giải thích ngắn gọn; dùng thì đúng và cấu trúc câu đơn giản. Tránh từ thừa và sửa lỗi phát âm/đảo từ. Ví dụ: bắt đầu bằng "Not really" hoặc "Yes, I do" rồi nói lý do ngắn gọn (how often / reason).

例: Not really. I usually take a taxi to school because my school is quite far from my home, so I don’t have many chances to walk.

提案: Nội dung tốt nhưng ngữ pháp thời quá khứ và trình bày cần cải thiện. Nên mở đầu trực tiếp, dùng thì quá khứ đơn cho hành động đã xảy ra và thêm liên từ để mạch văn tự nhiên. Tránh lặp từ và sửa trật tự từ.

例: Not really. I was addicted to mobile games when I was a child, so I spent most of my free time sitting on the couch and playing. It was an unhealthy habit and I later tried to be more active.

提案: Ý tưởng hợp lý nhưng câu lủng củng, lặp từ và thiếu cụ thể. Hãy mở đầu bằng câu chủ đề, dùng liên từ để giải thích và đưa ví dụ cụ thể (who, what benefits). Sử dụng từ vựng phù hợp như "relax", "fresh air", "exercise".

例: People like walking in parks because the air is fresher and the atmosphere is relaxing. For example, my grandparents often go to the park to get exercise and enjoy quiet time outdoors.

提案: Câu trả lời có ý nhưng ngữ pháp thì và cách diễn đạt cần chỉnh (conditional + reason). Nói rõ hơn về địa điểm cụ thể và vì sao bạn muốn đi. Dùng cấu trúc điều kiện "If I had the chance, I would..." và tránh lặp từ.

例: If I had the chance, I would take a long walk in Japan because the cities are beautiful and the air feels fresh. I’d especially like to stroll through quiet neighborhoods and parks.

提案: Câu trả lời lộn xộn, không trả lời trực tiếp câu hỏi hiện tại. Cần dùng thì quá khứ gần (recent past) hoặc nói rõ bạn không đi bộ thường xuyên. Tránh thông tin không liên quan (xe đạp từ lúc nhỏ) hoặc tóm tắt ngắn gọn nếu muốn nêu lý do.

例: I can’t remember the last time I went for a walk. I rarely walk because my parents bought me a bicycle when I was young, so I usually cycle instead.

× Not actually pick I'm have to go to school every day so but my school was very far from home so I have to take a taxi to go go got into my school the time.

✓ Not actually. I have to go to school every day, and my school is very far from home, so I have to take a taxi to get to school on time.

The original sentence has fragmented clauses, incorrect word order, and redundant words (sentence structure error). Combine clauses logically, use correct verb forms (have to, is), and replace 'go go got into my school the time' with 'get to school on time'. Suggestion: Break long run-on fragments into shorter clauses, ensure subject-verb pairs (my school is), and use clear phrases like 'get to school on time'.

× Not really. I'm very addicted to game when I was a child, so I always spend my time on sitting on the couch and playing mobile games.

✓ Not really. I was very addicted to games when I was a child, so I always spent my time sitting on the couch and playing mobile games.

Tense inconsistency: mixing present 'I'm very addicted' with past context 'when I was a child' (present tense issue). Also plural 'games' needed. Use past tense 'was' and 'spent', and use 'sitting' without 'on' after 'time'. Suggestion: Keep past time expressions consistent by using past tense verbs and correct plural forms.

× I think that that was a very unhealthy habit and I have to change.

✓ I think that was a very unhealthy habit and I had to change it.

Tense mismatch: 'I think' (present) followed by 'was' is acceptable, but 'I have to change' should match past context, so use 'had to change' (present tense issue). Also add object 'it'. Suggestion: When referring to habits in the past, use past tense consistently (had to change it).

× I think the kind chilling peoples parks parks are related to fresh atmospheres and with relaxing moments and like some special especially like my grandparents, they always want to go to a park and, uh, breathe in fresh air with a lot of.

✓ I think people like parks because they offer fresh air and a relaxing atmosphere. For example, my grandparents always like to go to a park to breathe fresh air and relax.

The original is repetitive, has incorrect noun forms, and lacks clear structure (sentence structure errors). Remove redundancies, use correct nouns ('people', 'parks', 'atmosphere'), and complete the idea by specifying 'breathe fresh air and relax'. Suggestion: Simplify ideas into clear clauses and avoid repeating words; use correct singular/plural nouns and complete expressions.

× Maybe in Japan, I have known Japan for fresh atmosphere and the cities in Japan was very gorgeous. I always want to go Japan for work.

✓ Maybe in Japan. I know Japan for its fresh atmosphere, and the cities in Japan are very beautiful. I have always wanted to go to Japan for work.

Multiple issues: tense and agreement. 'Have known' is incorrect for general knowledge (use present 'know'), 'was' should be 'are' to describe cities (future/tense issue), and 'go Japan' needs preposition 'to'. Also use 'have always wanted' for desire continuing to present. Suggestion: Use correct present tense for general facts ('know'), plural agreement ('cities are'), and add prepositions ('go to Japan').

× Uh, I don't think that I remember the last time I got a work because when I got into primary school, my father, my parents bought me a brand new bicycle.

✓ Uh, I don't remember the last time I went for a walk because when I started primary school my parents bought me a brand new bicycle.

Phrase 'got a work' is incorrect and sentence is awkward (sentence structure errors). Use 'went for a walk' and 'started primary school'; 'my father, my parents' is redundant—use 'my parents'. Suggestion: Use standard expressions ('went for a walk', 'started primary school') and avoid redundant nouns.

× So I always bring it, uh, to go any different place.

✓ So I always took it to go to different places.

Tense inconsistency: speaking about past habit requires past tense 'took' instead of 'bring' (present tense issue). Also use 'go to different places' with correct preposition and plural. Suggestion: When describing past routines, use past tense verbs and proper prepositions ('took it to go to different places').