Hobby— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Ответ был хороший, но можно сделать речь более краткой и структурированной. Начните с одного предложения, подтверждающего наличие хобби, затем приведите 1–2 конкретных примера и кратко объясните, почему вы ими занимаетесь. Избегайте лишних слов и повторов, используйте связки (for example, and, because) для плавности.

例: Yes, I have several hobbies. For example, I enjoy drawing and reading because drawing relaxes me and reading helps me learn new things.

提案: Ответ понятен, но содержит грамматические ошибки и неорганизованные фразы. Сформулируйте сначала факт (Yes, I did), затем дайте 1–2 конкретных примера и одно объяснение. Исправьте времена, артикли и порядок слов. Используйте связки (because, so, and) корректно.

例: Yes, I did. As a child I loved drawing and reading because I had a lot of energy and preferred activities to staying in one place.

提案: Ответ повторяет информацию и содержит множественные грамматические ошибки и повторы. Начните с краткого утверждения, затем объясните, почему вы продолжите этим заниматься, используя чёткие формулировки и избегая повторов. Употребляйте единственное/множественное число правильно и следите за порядком слов.

例: Yes, I have continued reading and drawing since childhood. I will keep them in the future because reading expands my knowledge, while drawing helps me relax and be creative.

提案: Ответ запутан и содержит много ошибок в грамматике и лексике. Формулируйте ясно: сначала скажите «No» или «Not really», затем поясните различия и добавьте одно конкретное замечание о членах семьи. Следите за правильным использованием глаголов и местоимений.

例: Not really. My father and siblings prefer sports, while my mother sometimes enjoys reading but she doesn't have as much free time as I do.

× I did because I was very activity in my childhood, so I have a lot of energy inside of me and I prefer to doing something like drawing, reading or watch TV, but I very hate staying on the one place.

✓ I did because I was very active in my childhood, so I had a lot of energy and I preferred doing things like drawing, reading, or watching TV, but I really hated staying in one place.

The sentence mixes present and past tenses inconsistently; the actions refer to childhood, so past tense should be used. 'activity' is the wrong word form; use the adjective 'active'. 'Have a lot of energy' should be past 'had'. 'Prefer to doing' is ungrammatical; use 'preferred doing' or 'preferred to do'. 'Watch TV' must be in gerund form 'watching' after 'doing' or as part of the list. 'Very hate' is incorrect collocation and tense; use 'really hated'. 'On the one place' is incorrect preposition and article; use 'in one place'. Suggestions: keep verbs in past tense for childhood, use correct adjective forms, replace infinitive+ing errors with either infinitive or gerund correctly, and correct prepositions and adverbs for natural English.

× Yes I do. As I said reading and drawing is my hobbies since my childhood so I think I will do it in the future because reading is very is very important things to develop in your to develop your knowledge and be clever and drawing is just drawing.

✓ Yes, I do. As I said, reading and drawing are my hobbies since childhood, so I think I will continue them in the future because reading is very important for developing your knowledge and drawing is simply a hobby I enjoy.

The compound subject 'reading and drawing' requires the plural verb 'are' not 'is'. 'My hobbies' already plural so verb must agree. 'Since my childhood' is better as 'since childhood'. 'I will do it' is unclear and mismatches number; use 'continue them'. 'Is very is very important things' contains duplication and wrong form 'things'; use 'very important for developing your knowledge'. 'Be clever' is unnatural; use 'to improve your knowledge' or 'to become more knowledgeable'. Suggestions: ensure subject-verb agreement with compound subjects, avoid repetition, use correct noun forms and prepositions ('important for', 'since childhood'), and use clear references for pronouns.

× Actually I don't because my siblings and my father prefer to do sports than reading or drawing. Though I think my mother prefer to read too. But she is not. She is don't have a lot of time as a me so yes.

✓ Actually I don't, because my siblings and my father prefer doing sports to reading or drawing. I think my mother prefers to read too, but she doesn't. She doesn't have as much time as I do, so no.

Use 'prefer doing/to' and the correct comparative preposition 'prefer X to Y' not 'prefer X than Y'. 'My mother prefer' needs third person singular 'prefers'. 'But she is not' is incorrect; use 'but she doesn't'. 'She is don't have' mixes forms; correct is 'she doesn't have'. Use comparative phrase 'as much time as I do' rather than 'as a me'. Suggestions: use 'prefer X to Y', apply correct third-person verb forms, use 'doesn't' for negation with third person, and use 'as much time as I do' for comparisons.