Chatting— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Cevap açık ama doğal olmayan ifadeler ve dilbilgisi hataları var. "chat mail" yerine "chatting" denemeli ve tekrarlanan kelimeler kaldırılmalı. Cümleleri daha akıcı yapmak için kısa bir konu cümlesiyle başlayıp nedenini ekleyin. Örneğin duygunuzu belirtin ve yalnızlık hissini kısaca açıklayın. Kelime tekrarlarını azaltın ve üç cümleyi aşmamaya çalışın.

例: Yes, I enjoy chatting with my friends, especially my best friend, because it helps me relax. Even so, I consider myself somewhat of a loner, so I don't chat all the time.

提案: Cevap yeterli ama dağınık ve sözdizimi hataları var. Konu cümlesiyle doğrudan cevap verin, ardından birkaç spesifik örnek verin; bağlaçlar kullanarak cümleleri birbirine bağlayın. Gereksiz tekrarları ve noktalama hatalarını düzeltin.

例: I usually talk about my everyday life, my job and my feelings, because close friends listen and offer advice. For example, I might tell them about a stressful day at work or ask for opinions when I'm upset.

提案: Doğrudan cevap iyi ancak ifadeler biraz garip ve tekrarlayıcı. "I'm a lonely person" ifadesini daha doğal bir şekilde açıklayın ve sebep belirtin. Bir sebep-örnek yapısı kullanın ve iki cümleyi geçmeyin.

例: I prefer chatting with one friend because I value deeper, more personal conversations. For instance, one-on-one talks let me open up more easily.

提案: Cümlede anlam belirsizliği ve kelime hataları var ("warm yellows" anlamsız). Tercihinizi net bir konu cümlesiyle belirtin, sonra nedenini açık ve doğal bir dilde verin; örneğin yüz ifadeleri ve beden dilinden bahsedin. Basit ama doğru kelimeler kullanın.

例: I prefer face-to-face communication because you can read body language and facial expressions, which makes conversations more warm and personal.

提案: Fikir açık ama dilbilgisi ve kelime sırası sorunlu. "It's natural" ve "I don't need to think like everyone else" şeklinde daha doğru cümleler kurun. Bir kısa örnek veya neden ekleyin ve tekrarları kaldırın.

例: Yes, I sometimes argue with friends because disagreements are natural. For example, we might argue about plans or opinions, but we usually resolve it quickly.

× Yes, I love chat mail with my friends, especially my best friend, but I'm kind of kinda a lonely person.

✓ Yes, I love chatting with my friends, especially my best friend, but I'm kind of a lonely person.

The phrase 'chat mail' is not standard; use the gerund 'chatting' as a noun. 'Kind of kinda' is redundant; choose one informal modifier such as 'kind of'. Use 'a lonely person' correctly. Suggestion: say 'I love chatting with my friends' or 'I enjoy chatting with my friends.'

× I talk about my ordinary life, my job, my feelings, because the friends, close friends, listen to you and give you some advice. So I'm telling them my. Feeling.

✓ I talk about my everyday life, my job and my feelings, because close friends listen to you and give you advice. So I tell them about my feelings.

Use 'everyday' instead of 'ordinary' for common usage. 'Close friends' should not be separated by commas. 'Give you some advice' is acceptable but 'give you advice' is more natural. 'I'm telling them my. Feeling.' is ungrammatical and mixes tenses and punctuation; use simple present 'I tell them about my feelings.' The gerund/infinitive and preposition 'about' are required after 'tell them.'

× I prefer one friend because once I'm telling I'm a lonely person, one friend is enough for me.

✓ I prefer one friend because, as I said, I'm a lonely person; one friend is enough for me.

'Once I'm telling' is incorrect. Use a phrase like 'as I said' or 'since I mentioned' to refer back. Maintain consistent tense: 'I'm a lonely person' is fine in present. Punctuation helps clarity. Suggestion: 'I prefer one friend because, as I said, I'm a lonely person.'

× I prefer face to face communication with my friends because the social media haven't that warm warm yellows. Or happy face.

✓ I prefer face-to-face communication with my friends because social media don't feel as warm or friendly.

Use hyphens in 'face-to-face' as a compound adjective. 'Social media' is plural; use 'don't' not 'haven't'. The phrase 'have that warm warm yellows' is incorrect vocabulary and imagery; replace with 'don't feel as warm or friendly.' Avoid repeating words like 'warm warm.'

× Yes, I argue sometimes because it's naturally. So I, I don't need think like everyone, everyone be herself, himself.

✓ Yes, I argue sometimes because it's natural. I don't need to think like everyone else; everyone should be themselves.

'It's naturally' incorrectly uses adverb; use adjective 'natural.' 'I don't need think' requires 'to': 'I don't need to think.' 'Everyone, everyone be herself, himself' is ungrammatical pronoun usage; use 'everyone else' and 'themselves' as a gender-neutral reflexive pronoun. Suggestion: 'I don't need to think like everyone else; everyone should be themselves.'