Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and natural. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific details using linking words. Avoid repetition and correct brand names and grammar (e.g., "I have been" instead of "I am in").

例: Yes, I usually buy shoes once or twice a year. Because I’ve been active in sports since childhood, I mainly buy athletic shoes, and I prefer reliable brands like Adidas and Puma.

提案: Give a direct answer first, then give a clear reason with one linking phrase. Use natural phrasing and avoid repeating negatives. Correct grammar: use past participles and simpler structures.

例: No, I haven’t bought shoes online. I prefer trying them on in a shop to check the fit and feel, so I usually buy shoes in person.

提案: Answer directly with a clear range, then justify briefly using linking words. Use correct currency phrasing and brand names, and avoid hesitations and repetition.

例: I usually spend between five and ten thousand rupees on a pair of shoes, typically around six to seven thousand, because that price range offers good quality options from brands like Adidas and Puma.

提案: Give a clear preference sentence first, then explain with one or two specific reasons using a linking word. Avoid vague phrases like "Not really" and repetition of "as well."

例: I prefer comfortable shoes rather than fashionable ones because stylish shoes are often stiff and uncomfortable for walking or exercising.

× I like to buy shoes once or twice in a year.

✓ I like to buy shoes once or twice a year.

Use the correct time expression: 'in a year' is less natural here; 'a year' is standard after frequency expressions (once/twice). Also no other tense change is needed.

× I mean the shoes which I wear generally are sports shoes because since childhood I am in more in physical activities so in such a way I like to buy sports shoes brands like Eda, Spuma.

✓ I mean I generally wear sports shoes because since childhood I have been more involved in physical activities, so I like to buy sports shoe brands like Eda and Spuma.

Multiple issues: incorrect relative clause usage ('the shoes which I wear generally' -> 'I generally wear sports shoes'), wrong verb form for a continuing past action ('I am in more in physical activities' -> 'I have been more involved in physical activities'), and conjunction/word order problems. Use present perfect continuous or present perfect ('have been involved') to show an action from past until now. Use 'and' instead of comma before the last brand.

× Well, I'll say not really I have ever bought shoes online because shoes the only thing which I feel I should go to the store and feel that how the quality is and then I'll purchase it.

✓ Well, I'd say not really; I have never bought shoes online because shoes are the only things for which I feel I should go to the store and check the quality before I buy them.

Use 'have never bought' for an experience up to now (present perfect). 'I'll say' and 'I have ever' are incorrect collocations. Use 'shoes are the only things for which' (relative clause and correct plural/agreement). 'Feel that how the quality is' is ungrammatical; use 'check the quality' or 'see what the quality is'. Also make pronoun agreement ('them').

× So I'll say I'd never buy a shoe online.

✓ So I'd say I'd never buy shoes online.

For general statements about habit or preference, use present conditional 'I'd never buy' and keep noun plural 'shoes' to match typical usage. Original mixes future/modal forms inconsistently.

× I'll say the money which I usually spend on a shoe is around five to ten thousand and somewhere in between six to seven thousand I will I'll get some good shoes brands like Adas and Puma have a good variety of shoes in this range.

✓ I'd say the money I usually spend on a pair of shoes is around five to ten thousand; usually around six to seven thousand I can get some good brands like Adidas and Puma in this range.

Use 'I'd say' or 'I usually spend' (present simple) rather than future 'I'll say'. 'on a shoe' should be 'on a pair of shoes'. Fix duplication and word order ('I will I'll'). Use 'Adidas' spelled correctly and rephrase for clarity and correct verb agreement ('can get').

× Not really. I can clearly say that the fashionable shoes are not the comfortable shoes because it feels very harsh to walk on those shoes as well as to do any physical workout on those shoes as well.

✓ Not really. I can clearly say that fashionable shoes are not comfortable because they feel harsh to walk in and to use for physical workouts.

Avoid redundant articles ('the fashionable shoes are not the comfortable shoes' -> 'fashionable shoes are not comfortable'). Use correct verb agreement ('they feel' not 'it feels') and correct preposition ('walk in' rather than 'walk on those shoes'). Remove repeated 'as well' and improve concision.