Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Focus on answering directly and clearly. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., Yes, I like buying shoes) then give one or two short supporting details (how often and why). Use correct words (shoes, online) and simple grammar: present simple for habits, and keep to 1–3 sentences. Avoid extra filler and unrelated phrases.

例: Yes, I like buying shoes. I usually buy them online once every few months because it is convenient and I can compare prices easily.

提案: Answer directly, then give one or two clear reasons with linking words (for example, because, so). Use correct nouns (shoes) and verbs (buy, order). Keep sentences short and grammatical and mention specific details (how often, what you like about online shopping).

例: Yes, I often buy shoes online because it is convenient and many stores offer free delivery. For example, I recently ordered a pair of trainers that arrived in three days.

提案: Give a clear estimate and explain briefly. Start with a topic sentence stating a typical price range or amount, then add one reason. Use vocabulary like inexpensive, mid-range, expensive, and give numbers if possible. Keep to 1–2 sentences.

例: I usually spend between $30 and $60 on casual shoes because I prefer inexpensive, comfortable options. I avoid expensive brands unless I need something special.

提案: Give a direct preference first (fashionable or comfortable), then support it with 1–2 clear reasons using linking words (for example, because, so). Use correct adjectives (comfortable, fashionable) and avoid irrelevant or unclear phrases. Keep it natural and concise.

例: I prefer comfortable shoes because I walk a lot every day and comfort matters more than style. However, I sometimes buy fashionable shoes for special occasions.

× I prefer buying shorts in online applications in shopping, you know because I was going north busy and I utilized credit card I unable to spend.

✓ I prefer buying shoes in online apps when shopping, because I was very busy and I used my credit card so I was unable to go out to shop.

Multiple preposition errors and word choices: 'in online applications in shopping' -> use 'in online apps when shopping' ('in' and 'on' confusion and redundant phrasing). 'north busy' and 'utilized credit card I unable to spend' are incorrect phrasing; changed to 'very busy' and 'used my credit card so I was unable to go out to shop' to convey reason. Suggestion: use 'in/on' appropriately ('in apps' or better 'on apps' but 'in online apps' is acceptable), simplify clauses and use conjunctions to link reasons.

× Yes I usually watch shorts in online because as friend ticket is easy and I feel that it's a convenient yet I it's have sell it free delivery.

✓ Yes, I usually buy shoes online because, as a friend said, it is easy, and I feel that it is convenient and even offers free delivery.

Errors include wrong verbs and prepositions: 'watch shorts in online' should be 'buy shoes online'; 'as friend ticket' is unintelligible—interpreted as 'as a friend said'; 'it's have sell it free delivery' should be 'it even offers free delivery'. Suggestion: use correct verbs ('buy' not 'watch'), use 'online' without 'in', and structure the sentence with commas and conjunctions for clarity.

× Uh, to be honest, I focus on not expensive. I mean that in inexpensive because I focus on is convenient and I ignore banned popular in the country.

✓ Uh, to be honest, I prefer not expensive shoes. I mean inexpensive ones, because I focus on convenience and ignore what is popular in the country.

Problems include incorrect word choice and sentence structure affecting comparison meaning: 'focus on not expensive' -> 'prefer not expensive' or 'prefer inexpensive shoes'; 'I focus on is convenient' -> 'I focus on convenience'; 'ignore banned popular' unclear -> 'ignore what is popular'. Suggestion: use nouns for abstract ideas ('convenience') and correct determiners ('inexpensive ones').

× As I say, I forgot the board because I went to get Fresno board should I think is unhappy lifestyle matches in their country.

✓ As I said, I forgot the brand because when I went to get that brand, I thought its style did not match my lifestyle.

Incorrect verb form 'As I say' -> 'As I said'; 'board' likely 'brand'; 'Fresno board' unclear, interpreted as 'that brand'; 'should I think is unhappy lifestyle matches in their country' is ungrammatical and unclear — rephrased to 'I thought its style did not match my lifestyle.' Suggestion: use correct past participle for reported speech ('said'), and 'brand' not 'board', and simplify complex clauses.

× On the one hand, comfortable shoe is asphalt tickets because it has convenient.

✓ On the one hand, comfortable shoes are better for walking because they are convenient.

Multiple errors: singular/plural mismatch 'comfortable shoe' -> 'comfortable shoes'; 'is asphalt tickets' is nonsensical, interpreted as 'are better for walking' or 'are more practical'; 'it has convenient' -> 'they are convenient' (adjective use). Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and use appropriate adjectives ('convenient') and clear comparative phrases ('better for walking' or 'more comfortable for daily use').