Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Begin with a clear topic sentence directly answering the question (e.g., ‘I used to be good at memorising things, but not so much now.’). Keep answers concise (max 4–5 sentences). Improve grammar (tense and articles) and fix unclear phrases (‘retail’ should be ‘tell’, ‘in the rest’ unclear). Use one or two specific examples and a linking word (e.g., ‘however’ or ‘but’) to connect ideas.

例: I used to be quite good at memorising things when I was a child, for example I could recall what I ate each day. However, these days I often forget important items, such as my mobile phone or keys, when I go out. This change is mostly because I am busier and more distracted.

提案: Start with a direct affirmative sentence then give one clear, specific example. Use correct past tense and proper sentence structure. Avoid listing unrelated items without connectors. Explain briefly the consequence to make the story coherent. Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

例: Yes, I have. For example, I once left my house keys in the cinema after watching a movie and a few days later I forgot my mobile phone at a restaurant. As a result, my girlfriend was very angry because my forgetfulness caused us to miss a reservation.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence saying what you need to remember (e.g., schedules, appointments). Use specific items and organize them with linking words (for example, ‘for instance’ or ‘also’). Avoid hesitation (‘uh’) and repetition. Provide 2–3 concrete examples of things you must remember (work schedule, classes, experiments) and a brief method you use to remember them.

例: I need to remember several daily things, especially my work schedule and class times. For instance, I must recall when I have lectures and when I need to run experiments in the lab. I also need to remember appointments and deadlines, so I plan them on my phone calendar.

提案: Begin with a concise topic sentence describing your main strategies. Use clear vocabulary (set an alarm, make a note). Correct phrasing: ‘set an alarm for important tasks’ and ‘write a note on my hand’ rather than ‘in my hand’. Give 2–3 methods and explain briefly when you use each method using linking words like ‘sometimes’ and ‘for example’.

例: I usually use my phone to remember important things: I set alarms and add reminders in the calendar. For quick notes or urgent reminders, I sometimes write a short note on my hand. For longer tasks, I keep a to-do list in a notes app so I can check it throughout the day.

× When was the child that I'm very good at memorizing things.

✓ When I was a child, I was very good at memorizing things.

The original sentence has incorrect word order and missing clause structure. 'When was the child that I'm very good at memorizing things' mixes past time clause with present tense and lacks a main verb for the time clause. Use 'When I was a child' to introduce the past time, and 'I was very good at memorizing things' to state the ability in the past. Ensure subject-verb order and consistent tense.

× I can remember what I eat every day in the weekend and I will retail to my parents.

✓ I can remember what I eat on weekends and I will tell my parents.

Errors: incorrect preposition 'in the weekend' (should be 'on weekends') and wrong verb 'retail' instead of 'tell'. Also 'what I eat every day in the weekend' is awkward; 'on weekends' is natural. Keep present tense for habitual action and future/modal 'will' for telling parents.

× But now I'm always forget some important things such as when I go out for a day or I always forget my mobile phone or key in the rest.

✓ But now I always forget some important things, such as when I go out for the day, or I often forget my mobile phone or keys at home.

Problems: wrong verb form 'I'm always forget' — auxiliary 'am' cannot combine with base verb 'forget'; use 'I always forget'. 'for a day' should be 'for the day' or 'when I go out for the day'. 'key' should be plural 'keys' and 'in the rest' is unclear; likely 'at home' or 'in the rest of the house'. Also prefer 'often' rather than repeating 'always'.

× Yes, for example I forgot my key in the cinema when I went out watch a movie and a few days later I forget my mobile phone, the restaurant and my girlfriend is so angry with my forgetful treat.

✓ Yes, for example I forgot my keys in the cinema when I went out to watch a movie, and a few days later I forgot my mobile phone at a restaurant, so my girlfriend was very angry with my forgetfulness.

Multiple tense and structure errors: 'went out watch a movie' needs infinitive 'to watch'. 'I forget' should be past 'I forgot' to match narrative. 'the restaurant' should be 'at a restaurant'. 'is so angry' should be past 'was very angry' to match past events. 'forgetful treat' is incorrect collocation; use 'forgetfulness'. Also pluralize 'keys' and use appropriate prepositions.

× There are many things in my work and life I do remember, such as I do remember the work schedule of my daily life and when I do good class and when I do do, uh, experiment, sometimes I also should remind myself to.

✓ There are many things in my work and life that I remember, such as my daily work schedule, the classes I teach, and when I conduct experiments; sometimes I also need to remind myself.

Issues: missing relative pronoun 'that' after 'life', unnecessary auxiliary 'do' in 'I do remember', awkward phrase 'work schedule of my daily life' -> 'my daily work schedule'. 'when I do good class' unclear—likely 'the classes I teach' or 'when I have class'. 'when I do do, uh, experiment' -> 'when I conduct experiments'. Sentence ending 'remind myself to' is incomplete; use 'need to remind myself'. Correct articles and remove redundant 'do'.

× I always write a note in my mobile phone or set a alarm of the time when I talk to some important things.

✓ I always write a note on my mobile phone or set an alarm for the time when I need to remember something important.

Preposition and article errors and wrong phrase 'talk to some important things'. Use 'on my mobile phone' or 'in my phone's notes' and 'set an alarm' (article 'an'). 'of the time' should be 'for the time' or 'for the reminder time'. Replace 'talk to some important things' with 'need to remember something important'. Also 'write a note' is followed by 'on' rather than 'in' in this context.

× Sometimes I even write a note in my hand by pencil to remind me the time.

✓ Sometimes I even write a note on my hand with a pencil to remind myself of the time.

Preposition and pronoun errors: 'write a note in my hand' should be 'on my hand'. 'by pencil' should be 'with a pencil'. 'remind me the time' needs 'remind myself of the time' or 'remind me about the time'. Use reflexive pronoun 'myself' for self-directed reminding.