Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答不够自然且有多处语法和用词错误。建议先用一句直接且简洁的主题句回答问题，然后补充1-2个具体例子或原因，注意时态和单复数，用合适的连接词使句子连贯。具体改进点：1) 将“memories in things”改为“good at memorising things”；2) 将冗长或不清晰的短语改成完整句子（例如说明什么时候能够记住、记住什么）；3) 减少重复，控制在3-4句内；4) 注意现在完成时或一般过去时的使用（如谈童年经历用过去时）。

例: Yes, I am quite good at memorising things. For example, when I was a child I could easily remember important dates and lessons at school. Because I often review information soon after learning it, the facts usually stay with me.

提案: 回答含糊且句子结构混乱。建议先直接回答（Yes/No），然后说明原因并给出具体例子，最后简短说明后果或你如何应对。注意不要使用片段句和重复词语，保持逻辑连贯并使用连接词如“because”或“for example”。

例: Yes, I have sometimes forgotten important things because of heavy study stress. For example, I once missed the time of a class because I was preparing for exams. Since then, I try to set reminders on my phone to avoid this problem.

提案: 回答不完整且语序错误，信息也不够具体。建议先给出总括性主题句（比如列举你日常必须记住的事项），然后用并列或序列连接词分别说明具体内容。注意名词的单复数和介词搭配（例如“when the bus arrives at the station”）。

例: In my daily life I need to remember things like bus schedules, appointments, and family birthdays. For instance, I always check the bus timetable before leaving home and write down important dates on a calendar.

提案: 方法描述基本可理解但表达不准确且冗长。建议用一到两句概括你的记忆方法，然后用1-2个具体步骤或工具说明，使用连词（for example/then/so）使过程更清晰。避免口头语和破碎句。

例: I usually use a few simple methods to remember important things. For example, I review the information several times and then write key points on a small note which I keep in my pocket so I can check it when needed.

× Yes, of course I'm good at memories in things.

✓ Yes, of course I'm good at memorising things.

句中使用了名词“memories”与介词短语“in things”不自然。英语中表达“擅长记忆事情”应使用动名词短语“good at memorising things”。建议用动名词 memorising 表示记忆这一能力，并直接跟宾语 things。

× When I was a child I usually remember something important and valuable from then on.

✓ When I was a child I usually remembered something important and valuable from then on.

句子描述过去习惯性动作，应使用过去时。原句使用现在时remember与时间状语“When I was a child”不一致。改为 remembered。注意“from then on”通常表示从那时起持续到现在，若要表达过去的习惯可删或改为“then”。

× I love this hobby and it keeps to the day.

✓ I loved this hobby and it lasted throughout the day.

句子结构和动词搭配不当。原文中“I love this hobby”与前句过去时不一致，且“keeps to the day”不是固定表达。若描述过去应把 love 改为 loved，并用 last 或 continue 表达持续性：lasted throughout the day。若要表达现在仍然喜欢，可保留现在时并改为“It continues to this day.”（若表示持续到现在）。

× Yes, of course, because the heavy study stress I usually forget something important such as.

✓ Yes, of course, because of heavy study stress I usually forget something important, for example deadlines or class times.

句中缺少介词“because of”引出原因，且句尾“such as.”不完整，应给出具体例子。还需要调整词序和添加逗号。注意时态可保留现在时，表示经常发生。

× When to have a class? And so on.

✓ For example, I forget when I have a class and similar things.

原句为不完整的片段，缺少主语和完整句式。应把疑问短语改为名词性短语或完整句以匹配上下文，如“I forget when I have a class”。

× This is a trouble for me.

✓ This is a problem for me.

英语中常用“problem”表示问题，“trouble”可用但需要不可数用法或不同搭配。更自然的表达是“This is a problem for me.”。

× When the bus is on station and my parents and friends birthday and important.

✓ When the bus is at the station, and my parents' and friends' birthdays and other important dates.

介词用法错误：应使用“at the station”而不是“on station”。此外，生日需用所有格“parents' and friends' birthdays”。句子结构也不完整，需补充“and other important dates”使意思完整。

× In my daily life.

✓ In my daily life, I need to remember these things.

句子不完整，缺乏谓语。将其并入完整句子，例如“In my daily life, I need to remember these things.”来表达完整意思。

× I usually think courteous things for a long time and, uh, rethink these things and remember it and write it onto a paper.

✓ I usually think about important things for a long time, rethink them, remember them, and write them on a piece of paper.

原句中“courteous things”用词不当，应为“important things”。动词搭配和代词也有错误：应使用“think about”“rethink them”“remember them”。“write it onto a paper”应改为“write them on a piece of paper”。此外并列动词需保持一致形式。

× Put it in my. Pocket when I want to think it, I will take it out.

✓ I put it in my pocket. When I want to remember something, I will take it out.

原句标点和介词使用错误。“in my. Pocket”应为“in my pocket”。此外“when I want to think it”表达不自然，改为“When I want to remember something”。将句子拆成两句更清晰。