Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Make your answer more natural, concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting examples linked with a connector. Avoid repetition and keep it to under five sentences.

例: I'm not very good at memorising things. For example, my mother sometimes asks me to bring items to the kitchen and I often forget soon after she asks me. Because of that, I try to write quick reminders on my phone so I don't miss tasks.

提案: Tell the story in a clear, logical sequence with correct tense and fewer repetitions. Begin with a topic sentence saying yes, then briefly describe what happened, why it happened, and the result. Use linking words like 'because' and 'so'.

例: Yes, I once forgot something important. I accidentally locked my brother in the car because I didn't notice he was still sleeping inside while I was distracted by my phone. Fortunately, we solved it quickly, but I learned to check the car before locking the doors.

提案: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence about key daily responsibilities, then add one or two specific details about what you must remember. Use correct grammar and linking words to make the meaning clear.

例: I need to remember my work responsibilities every day. For example, because I work part-time at a food stall, I must track deliveries and know when vegetables or meat will arrive so I can prepare and serve customers on time.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence about your main memory strategies, then provide specific examples and a brief reason why they work. Use correct verb forms and linkers like 'also' or 'for example'.

例: I usually use my phone's voice recorder or notes app to remember important things. For very critical tasks, I sometimes write reminders on my hand so I see them immediately; this helps me avoid missing urgent duties.

× Actually I'm not person really good at memorize.

✓ Actually I'm not a person who is really good at memorizing.

Missing article 'a', incorrect adjective order and missing relative clause; 'memorize' should be gerund 'memorizing' after 'good at'. Use 'a person who is' to describe ability.

× I sometimes forget somethings such as when my when my mom asked me to put things to her kitchen and I forget in a short time.

✓ I sometimes forget things, for example when my mom asks me to put things in her kitchen and I forget shortly after.

'Somethings' is incorrect plural; use 'things'. Use present tense 'asks' to match habitual action. Preposition 'in' for location. 'In a short time' is better as 'shortly after'.

× To be honest it is a very funny story.

✓ To be honest, it was a very funny story.

Context describes a past event, so use past tense 'was' instead of present 'is'.

× One time I locked my brother in the car because I forgot that he was sleep.

✓ One time I locked my brother in the car because I forgot that he was asleep.

Use adjective 'asleep' to describe state of sleeping, not base verb 'sleep'.

× He was sleeping inside and I just scroll my phone and walk out the car and lock them in.

✓ He was sleeping inside and I just scrolled through my phone, walked out of the car, and locked him in.

Narration of a past event requires past tense verbs 'scrolled', 'walked', 'locked'. Use 'through' with 'scroll' and 'out of' for exiting. Use correct pronoun 'him' for singular brother.

× As a part as a part because I'm work as a part time job so sometimes I have to responsible for my job so I have to manage like how when will vegetable or when will the meat come in?

✓ Because I work a part-time job, sometimes I am responsible for my tasks, so I have to manage when the vegetables and the meat will arrive.

Remove repeated phrase, use 'work a part-time job' or 'work part-time'. 'Have to responsible' is incorrect; use 'am responsible'. Word order for questions changed to statement 'when they will arrive'. Use plural 'vegetables' and definite article 'the' if specific.

× Sometimes I recorded in my phone and if the things is very important, I will write on my hand so that I can see them anywhere.

✓ Sometimes I record it on my phone, and if something is very important, I write it on my hand so that I can see it anywhere.

Use simple present 'record' for habitual action. Use 'on my phone' not 'in'. Agreement: 'things is' -> 'something is' or 'things are'. Use 'write it on my hand' and singular pronouns to match. Habitual future 'will' not necessary; use present simple for routines.