Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 문장 구조와 흐름을 명확히 하고 불필요한 중복과 음성적 채움(uh, ahh 등)을 줄이세요. 답변은 주제 문장으로 시작하고, 그 다음 간단한 이유와 예시를 한두 문장으로 덧붙이며 최대 5문장 이내로 유지하세요. 또한 'AHHID'처럼 이해하기 어려운 표현 대신 명확한 단어(예: 'forgetful')를 사용하세요. 마지막으로 현재 진행형 또는 습관을 말할 땐 일관된 시제를 사용하세요.

例: No, I'm not very good at memorising things. I often forget appointments and plans because I'm quite forgetful. For example, I sometimes miss meetings if I don't write them down. To avoid this, I try to set reminders on my phone and wake up early to review my schedule.

提案: 시제와 문장 연결을 정확히 쓰세요. 경험을 말할 때는 과거 시제를 일관되게 사용하고, 이유와 결과를 명확하게 연결하는 접속사를 쓰면 더 자연스럽습니다. 불필요한 반복과 망설임을 줄이고 구체적인 상황(무엇을 잊었는지, 왜 중요한지)을 하나의 예로 간결하게 제시하세요.

例: Yes, I once forgot an important appointment last year. I was preparing for my final exams and planning to make several videos, so I was very busy. As a result, I missed a scheduled recording session that was important for my channel. After that, I started using calendar alerts to prevent it from happening again.

提案: 명확한 주제문을 먼저 말하고, 필요한 구체적 항목(날짜, 서류, 준비 사항 등)을 연결어로 정리하세요. 'exchange students' 대신 'exchange program'처럼 정확한 표현을 사용하고, 'prepare English grade'는 자연스럽지 않으므로 'improve my English skills' 또는 'prepare for the English interview'로 바꾸세요.

例: I need to remember important dates and tasks for my exchange program. For example, I have an interview at my university, so the interview date is the most important item on my schedule. I also need to prepare documents and improve my English for the interview.

提案: 간결하고 요점 중심으로 말하세요. 같은 의미의 문장을 반복하기보다, 사용하는 방법과 그 이유, 그리고 구체적 예시(예: 스마트폰 알람이나 위클리 플래너)를 한두 문장으로 제시하세요. 또한 연결어(so, therefore, because)를 적절히 사용해 논리 흐름을 명확히 하세요.

例: I use my phone calendar and set reminders to remember important things. For instance, I set alarms for appointments and use a weekly planner to review upcoming tasks, so I rarely miss events.

× I don't think I am a good person to remember things because uh, I often forget many plans or appointments, uh, and I think I am a little bit AHHID person so I miss. Many things. So I try to I try to try not to forget my plans and try to get up early.

✓ I don't think I am good at remembering things because I often forget many plans or appointments, and I am a bit absent-minded, so I miss many things. I try not to forget my plans and try to get up early.

The original has broken sentence structure, repetition, and awkward phrasing. Use 'good at remembering' (verb+ing after 'good at'), combine fragments into coherent sentences, replace informal 'AHHID' with 'absent-minded', and remove repeated 'I try'. Suggested: keep verbs consistent and avoid sentence fragments. (학생은 문장 구조가 엉켜 있고 반복과 어색한 표현이 있어 더 자연스럽게 연결하고 동사 형태를 맞춰야 합니다.)

× Yes, last year I have I, I was very busy for my career and my studying because I was ready for my final exams and also I have a plan to make many videos so. Uh, and then, uh, I forget, forgot the important appointments, which is, which was making videos.

✓ Yes, last year I was very busy with my career and my studies because I was preparing for my final exams and I also had plans to make many videos, so I forgot some important appointments related to making videos.

Mixing present perfect and past simple is incorrect for a finished time expression 'last year'. Use past simple: 'was', 'was preparing', 'had plans', 'forgot'. Use 'busy with' not 'busy for' and 'my studies' not 'my studying'. Clarify relative clause: 'appointments related to making videos'. (종결된 과거 시점인 'last year'와 함께 현재완료를 쓰면 안 됩니다. 전반적으로 동사 시제와 전치사 사용을 과거형과 적절한 표현으로 수정해야 합니다.)

× The interview for exchange students will be held in my university. Uh so the date is the most important things in my schedule. So I'm ready for this interview and prepare English grade.

✓ The interview for exchange students will be held at my university, so the date is the most important thing in my schedule. I am preparing for this interview and working on my English grades.

Use 'at my university' (correct preposition). 'The date' is singular, so use 'thing' not 'things'. Use progressive 'am preparing' for an upcoming event. 'Prepare English grade' is ungrammatical—use 'working on my English grades' or 'improving my English'. ('at' 전치사 사용, 단수/복수 일치, 진행형 사용, 그리고 자연스러운 표현으로 'English grades'로 수정했습니다.)

× Umm to remember important things I use my calendar and reminders so that I. Uh. So that I can avoid forgetting my important schedules.

✓ To remember important things, I use my calendar and reminders so that I can avoid forgetting my important appointments and schedules.

Begin sentence with infinitive 'To remember'. 'Avoid forgetting' is correct, but 'schedules' is vague—'appointments and schedules' is clearer. Remove sentence fragments and filler sounds. Keep 'reminders' and 'calendar' as tools and connect purpose with 'so that'. ('To' 부정사로 시작하고 문장 파편을 제거하며 목적을 명확히 표현했습니다.)

× They are helpful for my schedules. So I can do many things and I can not forget the things.

✓ They are helpful for keeping my schedule, so I can do many things and not forget them.

Use 'keeping my schedule' not 'helpful for my schedules'. Combine sentences for fluency. Use 'not forget them' rather than 'I can not forget the things'—avoid unnecessary words. 'Cannot' can be written as 'not' in this context; native phrasing is 'and not forget them'. (문장을 결합하고 중복을 제거하며 더 자연스러운 대명사 사용으로 수정했습니다.)