Flowers— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 질문에 바로 답한 것은 좋지만, 답변이 모호하고 문법 오류가 있습니다. 색깔을 좋아한다고 말했지만 ‘꽃’을 좋아한다는 표현으로 명확히 해야 하고, 이유나 간단한 설명을 덧붙여 자연스럽고 풍부한 답변을 만들어야 합니다. 예: 주제 문장(꽃을 좋아한다), 이유(색깔·향기 등), 구체적 예(특정 꽃) 순으로 1~3문장으로 구성하세요. 또한 문장 연결을 위해 because, so 같은 연결사를 사용하세요.

例: Yes, I love flowers, especially blue ones because their color is very calming. For example, I often admire blue hydrangeas in my neighborhood garden. They make me feel peaceful.

提案: 의미는 전달되지만 문법과 어순 오류가 많습니다. 자연스러운 주제문과 이유·빈도 표현을 덧붙이세요. ‘She loves flowers’로 시작하고 빈도 표현(frequently/often)과 예시를 이어 연결사(so/and)로 연결하면 더 매끄럽습니다. 동사의 시제와 어순을 바로잡고 불필요한 단어를 제거하세요.

例: Yes, my mother loves flowers. She often visits the local flower shop and buys seasonal bouquets, so our house is always decorated with fresh blooms.

提案: 전달하려는 내용은 괜찮지만 문법(지시대명사, 전치사, 시제)과 문장 흐름이 어색합니다. 먼저 간단한 주제문을 말하고(예: There aren't many flowers near my house), 이어서 예외(temple gardens)와 이유 또는 습관을 linking word(however/so/therefore)를 사용해 연결하세요. 문장을 2~3개로 간결하게 정리하세요.

例: There aren't many flowers right next to my house; however, there is a temple with beautiful gardens behind it. So whenever I want to see flowers, I usually walk to the temple to enjoy them.

提案: 의도는 좋지만 모순된 표현('Of course I can't')과 문법 오류가 있습니다. 긍정 응답이면 'Of course I do' 또는 'Yes'로 시작하고 이유와 구체적 상황(스마트폰에 사진이 많다)을 연결사(so/therefore/because)를 사용해 설명하세요. 문장 수는 2~3문장으로 유지하세요.

例: Yes, I often take photos of flowers because I want to capture their beauty. As a result, I have lots of flower pictures saved on my smartphone.

提案: 내용 전달이 불명확하고 단어 선택·구문이 크게 틀렸습니다('spa older people' 등). 질문에 대한 일반적 관찰을 먼저 말하고, 예시로 가족(어머니)을 덧붙이세요. 빈도 부사(sometimes/often)와 명확한 명사(older people/elderly people) 사용을 권장합니다. 문장을 간결하게 하고 중복을 피하세요.

例: Yes, many people, especially older generations, enjoy sending flowers or pictures of flowers. For example, my mother sometimes sends me photos of seasonal blooms.

× Yes, I love blue.

✓ Yes, I love blue flowers.

The pronoun or noun is missing; 'blue' alone is an adjective and needs a noun to be clear. Use 'blue flowers' to specify the object of affection.

× Yes I know my mom really likes the flowers, even love she go to the flower shop frequently.

✓ Yes, I know my mom really likes flowers; she even goes to the flower shop frequently.

Awkward word order and incorrect pronoun placement. Use a clear subject 'she' before the verb and correct verb form 'goes' for third person singular. Remove 'the' before 'flowers' when speaking generally.

× Not many of it, but behind of my house there are temple and temple gardens.

✓ Not many, but behind my house there is a temple and temple gardens.

'Not many of it' is incorrect for countable nouns; use 'Not many' or 'There are not many flowers'. 'There is a temple' (singular) and 'temple gardens' (plural) require correct article and word order; 'behind of' should be 'behind' without 'of'.

× So if I wanted to see flowers and I go to the temple.

✓ So if I want to see flowers, I go to the temple.

Mixed conditional tenses and conjunction use: use present tense 'want' and 'go' for habitual action. Remove the extra conjunction 'and' and add a comma for clarity.

× Of course I can't, I can't hold the feeling of the beauty of flowers.

✓ Of course I can; I can't help feeling the beauty of flowers.

The original contradicts itself and uses 'can't hold the feeling' awkwardly. Use the idiomatic expression 'can't help feeling' to express inability to resist an emotion. Also correct modal polarity.

× So in my smartphone there are lots of picture of flowers.

✓ So on my smartphone there are lots of pictures of flowers.

Use 'on my smartphone' not 'in my smartphone'. 'Lots of' should be followed by a plural noun 'pictures'. Preposition and pluralization corrected.

× Yeah, spa older people who loves to send loves to send flower pictures, like my mom.

✓ Yeah, some older people like to send flower pictures, like my mom.

'spa' likely mistyped for 'some'. Fix subject-verb agreement: 'people like' not 'people who loves'. Remove duplicate phrase. Ensure plural agreement.

× My mom sometimes send me a photo of seasonal flowers.

✓ My mom sometimes sends me a photo of seasonal flowers.

Third person singular subject 'my mom' requires the verb to take an -s: 'sends'.