Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and correct factual and grammatical errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and add one specific detail about a landmark or feature. Use linking words to connect ideas and keep within 3–4 sentences.

例: My hometown is Changhua, in central Taiwan. It has a warm climate and a lively night market where you can try local snacks like oyster omelette. Because of the markets and friendly people, I always feel happy when I visit.

提案: Clarify vocabulary and give more specific descriptions. Begin with a clear topic sentence, correct terms (e.g., 'rural' or 'mountainous' instead of 'lunar area'), and add one concrete detail about the scenery or a hiking trail using a linking word.

例: I like my hometown because it is a rural, mountainous area. For example, Bagua Mountain (Bai Gushan) offers several well-maintained trails with scenic views, so I often go hiking there at weekends.

提案: Correct tense and age expressions, and organize sentences clearly. State the duration directly, then briefly explain the move and travel convenience using linking words. Avoid fragmented sentences.

例: I lived in Changhua for about 15 years. However, when I went to university I moved to Taichung, which is nearby, so it is easy for me to go back to my hometown by bus or train.

提案: Give a balanced answer with clear reasons and specific examples. Start with a direct opinion, then provide 2 concise reasons (jobs, entertainment, education) and finish with a linking phrase. Avoid vague place names and incomplete sentences.

例: Not really. Because Changhua is quite rural, young people often move to cities like Taichung or Taipei for more job opportunities and better entertainment and education options. Therefore many young people leave to find work or study.

× My hometown is located in the middle of Taiwan in Zhanghua country.

✓ My hometown is located in the middle of Taiwan in Changhua county.

Use the correct place name and noun: 'Changhua' is the common English spelling and 'county' (not 'country') is the correct administrative term. 'In' is fine for location.

× It's a lovely place especially with warm weather.

✓ It's a lovely place, especially because of the warm weather.

The original is understandable but awkward. Adding 'because of' clarifies the reason and a comma improves flow. Pronoun use is fine, but sentence clarity improves with this change.

× Also, you also can try some street food in the night market.

✓ Also, you can try some street food at the night market.

Remove the duplicated adverb 'also' and use the preposition 'at' for event/location 'night market'. Subject-verb agreement is fine but wording and preposition choice are corrected.

× It always made me feel happy especially when I am in the night market.

✓ It always makes me feel happy, especially when I am in the night market.

Tense consistency: the present simple 'always makes' matches 'I am' for habitual feelings. Add a comma before 'especially'.

× I like my hometown because it is in lunar area.

✓ I like my hometown because it is in a rural area.

'Lunar' (relating to the moon) is incorrect; the intended word is 'rural'. Add the article 'a' before 'rural area'.

× You can enjoy the scenery such as Bai Gushan.

✓ You can enjoy scenery such as Bai Gushan.

Both forms are acceptable, but dropping 'the' sounds more natural before 'scenery' in this general statement. Alternatively, 'the scenery of Bai Gushan' is also correct.

× They have a lot of different types of trail for people to hike.

✓ There are many different types of trails for people to hike.

Use 'there are' to introduce existence (There be issue, ID 3) and plural 'trails' to match 'types'. 'Many' is a more natural quantifier than 'a lot of' in this structure.

× I have lived there for 15 years old.

✓ I lived there for 15 years.

The original mixes present perfect with an age expression incorrectly. If referring to a past duration, use past simple 'I lived there for 15 years.' If intending to say you have lived there since age 15, say 'I have lived there since I was 15.'

× When I was university student, I moved to Taichung, also in the middle of Taiwan.

✓ When I was a university student, I moved to Taichung, which is also in the middle of Taiwan.

Add the article 'a' before 'university student' and link the clause with 'which is' for clarity. Commas improve readability.

× To stay there.

✓ I stayed there.

Fragment: 'To stay there.' is not a complete sentence. Use 'I stayed there.' or combine with previous sentence: '...I moved to Taichung, where I stayed.'

× It's very easy to travel to go back to my hometown.

✓ It's very easy to travel back to my hometown.

Remove redundant 'to go' and use 'travel back to' for correct word order and idiomatic expression.

× Not really because my hometown is quite rural area.

✓ Not really, because my hometown is quite a rural area.

Add 'a' before 'rural area' and a comma after 'Not really' for natural phrasing.

× I think people should move to more suburban or urban areas such as Taejong or other places like Taipei.

✓ I think people should move to more suburban or urban areas such as Taichung or other places like Taipei.

Correct the place name 'Taichung' (not 'Taejong'). Preposition 'to' is fine. Ensure correct city spelling.

× They have more opportunities for working or they have different types of.

✓ They have more job opportunities or different kinds of activities and services.

The original is incomplete ('different types of' what?). Provide a complete noun phrase: 'different kinds of activities and services' or 'different types of jobs.' Also avoid repeating 'they have' by joining ideas.